hi! (:
this was inspired by the song "Almost Lover" by A Fine frenzy. I was just listening to my iPod and it just came out.
Hope you like it. And yeah, i love Shess.. :P
Review please?
Almost Lover
I screwed things up, as usual.
I made him fall so badly, and now i feel guilty.
Guilt.
I've never felt guilt in my entire life, until now.
Not even when i accused Mitchie at Final Jam, not even when Peggy and Ella left me, damn they were right, but still no guilt. I felt bad, sad, like a totally bitch, but that's it.
Now is different.
But i just wanted to know how he tastes like, and i did it. And he just kissed me back. And maybe we got a little bit too… Excited about it. However, she saw us, and now she's heartbroken, he's heartbroken and I'M heartbroken.
"I'm sorry Shane"
I tell him that i'm sorry. Because i really am.
"She's gone, she's hurt Tess… I hurted her…"
He was so sad and broken. My fault.
"I'll talk to her, i'll tell her it was me"
He looked at me with those gorgeous eyes, like asking me 'what?'.
I answered him.
"I never want to see you unhappy…"
When i said that, his look was priceless. So confused. Yes Shane, Tess, the bitch Tyler actually has a heart, she can feel too, as strange as it sounds, huh?
"I'll leave you alone"
Before he could tell something, i was gone. I don't want to change my mind now, i'm actually doing the right thing, i'm gonna talk to Mitchie, i'm gonna tell her it was my fault, not his, just to make him happy. For the first time, it was not all about me, it was about the only one i cared about.
And it felt so good, as if i were a good person. Feels good, painful, but good.
I heard some footsteps behind the door of his cabin, as if he wanted to stop me… But he just didn't. Oh well.
No way i'm crying. The tears rolling down my cheeks are telling me the opposite. And so does the pain i feel right now. It hurts a lot.
"Goodbye my almost lover.."
Goodbye my hopeless dream.