Disclaimer: I don't own HP
Author's Note: I tried to stay as close to the canon as possible but obviously this is AU so I made some changes.
This story has three chapters that are almost ready, I will upload them within the next few days (unless someone has mercy on me and decides to become my Beta)
Read and (hopefully) enjoy :)
The Patented Daydream charm
Prologue
It took a lot to impress Hermione Granger. And yet there she was in Fred and George's shop and was just that impressed.
She had always thought of them as troublemakers and only good for annoying pranks and mediocre jokes.
But here and now she had to change her opinion of them, some, no actually most, well basically all of their inventions were creative and ingenious and quite extraordinary magic. The last part she had said aloud to Harry while examining a box that read patented day dream charm. Out of nowhere arrived Fred and told her happily that she could keep that one since she was so impressed by it.
___________________________________________________________________________
Her sixth year wasn't to her liking at all so far.
First Harry got the Potions book of this halfblood prince, a dubious character and now he beat her in every potion class. It was not that she didn't think he deserved it, but she was studying for hours in the library while he was off somewhere doing nothing. Oh well, yes she thought she deserved more to be the best and get all the praise in class.
Secondly, everything had started so well with Ron this year. She thought that she liked him in more ways than just a best friend and was pretty sure he felt the same. Heck she even went against all her principles for him and hexed McLaggen with a confundus spell.
How was she rewarded? At first he started glaring at her, completely out of the blue, when she asked Harry about it he looked very uncomfortable and just mumbled something about Viktor and kisses. What Viktor had to do with anything was beyond her, after all that was more than a year ago.
And now he had found himself a girlfriend, Lavender Brown. And they had absolutely no shame and were constantly attached to each other and eating each others faces. It was disgusting.
Harry was a dear at least most of the time when he wasn't droning on about Malfoy being a Death Eater on a mission.
School had just started two months ago and she already needed holidays, preferably far away from certain infuriating red heads, and Malfoys (Death Eaters or not).
It was only the beginning of November and the weather was as dismal as she felt. Hermione was sitting in the library in front of her a huge tome, but she couldn't concentrate for long, because she was making a pro and con Ron list in her head.
She did that a lot lately and the con list had become longer and longer she could hardly remember anymore why she fancied herself in love with him in the first place.
He was a great guy as a friend but, if she was honest with herself she knew that as a boyfriend he would simply drive her crazy.
This revelation should have made her feel better but it didn't. Wherever she went it seemed as if she was surrounded by happy couples. She saw Harry and Ginny fawning on each other and it was only a question of time when they would finally be together.
And then she the boring bookworm would be left alone. Nobody liked her that way, she was boring and plain and as Ron loved to tell her a kill joy, and she felt so utterly sorry for herself.
Since her time at the library had been completely unproductive she decided to go back to her dormitory, eat a complete chocolate bar, feel a little bit more sorry for herself and then she would try to sleep.
Luckily nobody in the common room noticed her so she was able to sneak undisturbed into the girls' dormitory.
There she got her pyjama and a chocolate bar from her trunk that was when she noticed a colourful box underneath her socks. She took it out, on the front it read Weasley's Wizard Wheezes and below Patented Daydream charm. On the back was the picture of a handsome couple on a pirate ship, in the back were some dolphins playing in the water, it was sickeningly romantic.
"That's exactly what I need" the Gryffindor thought to herself, "if I don't have any romance in my real life than at least I will have some this way." That thought made her feel even more pathetic so she pushed it to the back of her mind and instead just hoped that it would
take her mind off of other things and she wasn't opposed to the idea of dreaming about being in the arms of a handsome stranger.
She got ready, closed the curtains around her bed and got comfortable, finally she spoke the incantation.
At first she started to feel warm and giddy, her eyes dropped close and all of a sudden she lay on the grass in a beautiful garden, around her were flowerbeds with all kinds of colourful flowers, most of them Hermione didn't even know, a soft warm breeze blew through her hair and she smelled the freshly mown grass. Next to her was her favourite novel "Pride and Prejudice" by Jane Auston (because contrary to popular belief, Hermione does indulge in a good romance novel from time to time).
She noticed that she wore a white summer dress and was bare food, she lay on her belly with her head resting on her arms and her eyes closed. Everything around her was so peaceful, the wind softly swept through the leaves and some birds were chirping.
Suddenly she heard someone coming towards her, but she felt too lazy to move to see who it was. Then unexpectedly someone ran his fingers through her hair and whispered "hello love" in her ear.
That person began to run his fingers softly up and down her back. Hermione got goose bumps and felt a trillion butterflies in her stomach. Still she was too lazy to move and just made some small noises of contentment, but it seems that wasn't good enough for whoever was caressing her, because he started to tickle her mercilessly. She laughed and rolled around and found herself staring into hazel eyes that sparkled with mirth, he had freckles on his nose and bright red, slightly dishevelled hair.
Before she was able to form a coherent thought he pulled her close to him and started kissing her lips. Softly at first but then the kiss grew more passionate and he started running his tongue along her lips then he entered her mouth and started teasing the tip of her tongue.
All of a sudden he drew away and looked at her with a mischievous grin before he started kissing a trail down her jaw to her neck, while his hands explored her thighs and stomach.
Hermione ran her fingers through his hair and her other hand caressed his back while she pressed her body closer to him.
They kept kissing and caressing each other until Hermione's vision became more and more fuzzy and she opened her eyes to find herself in her bed, alone. She closed her eyes again and a small sigh escaped her lips, she could still feel Fred's hands on her body and his lips on hers.
Wait a minute. All of a sudden Hermione came back to reality. Why Fred, it should have been a handsome stranger, and how could she be sure that it was not George? But for some reason she was certain that it was Fred who had caressed her in her dream.
She felt confused, why would she dream of Fred, weren't you supposed to dream of someone that you fancied? She most certainly did not fancy Fred.
Those infuriating twins, they must have manipulated the charm so that you would dream about one of them, concluded the bushy haired brunette, after all that was just like the twins to do something like that. She could imagine how hilarious they must find it that the uptight bookworm should have a steamy daydream about one of them.
After that train of thought Hermione had worked herself up over the whole daydream issue and decided to give the twins a piece of her mind. So she set about to write a letter that would leave no doubt about how she felt about them and their blasted Patented Daydream charm.
*
Fred and George,
I am sure you two had a good laugh behind my back after giving me that Patented Daydream charm.
How stupid of me to think that you could actually be nice, or that you maybe matured and put your minds to some good use for a change. I guess you will always be the two troublemakers who play stupid pranks on people and make fun of everybody, without considering how they might feel about it.
And I better stop here before I start rambling.
Hermione
The next morning Hermione stormed, still feeling rather angry, to the owlery to send her letter before breakfast.
One Charms and one transfiguration class later at lunch, she had already calmed down considerably and started to wonder whether or not she had maybe overacted a little.
This time she was thankful that her friends were otherwise occupied (Ron alternated between stuffing food into his mouth and snogging his girlfriend, while Harry observed Malfoy junior to find some evidence for his theories) because Hermione had felt a little off all morning and didn't feel like telling anyone what was actually going on, so she was glad that they were oblivious to her inner turmoil.
After most of her anger was gone, she realised several things (thank God that they had only reading assignments this morning) first that she was angry with Fred and George because they must think that she would have the need for a daydream charm (that she indeed had it was beside the point) but they must think that her life was so uneventful in the romance department that she needed some stupid charms to spice it up a little and then they had the audacity to show up in her daydream, well one of them had.
And they surely made fun of the boring bookworm. (And yes that's a lot of insecurity coming up there)
Then a small voice piped up in her mind and told her that maybe she was a little unfair and that the two probably didn't think that and that with all the stress and emotional distress that she felt, she maybe was a little sensitive at the moment.
So then she started to think back of the daydream she had, and she remembered Fred's soft brown eyes and his huge grin and how his hands had felt on her skin, which led her down a path she most definitely didn't want to go down and she felt annoyed again.
Her musings were stopped when an owl dropped a letter in her juice. She opened it and was a little nervous what might be inside, because she was pretty sure now that she had overreacted before and felt a little embarrassed.
Our dearest Hermione,
We don't know what we have done to induce your wrath. But whatever it is we apologize and hope to be forgiven. We most certainly wouldn't want such a powerful witch as yourself as our enemy (Yes we have heard about Ron and the birds)
We are sorry to hear that you weren't satisfied with our Patented Daydream charm but rest assured that we never made fun of you.
We would like to make it up to you. Next time you set your delicate foot into our store you can choose whatever you want and it'll be on the house.
Your most humble servants,
Fred and George
"Most humble my arse", snorted Hermione. Those two buggers pretended that they had no idea why she was so upset. Hermione gave the owl a treat and told her to wait before she took out her quill and some parchment from her back.
Fred and George,
You two are the most infuriating people I ever had the misfortune to meet. Since you pretend to not know what is wrong with your daydream charm let me enlighten you. (By the way I only used it because I was curious what you two created, it's not like I need something like that, I am happy with my love life, thank you very much). So anyway, as I was drifting in a peaceful daydream, you Fred had the audacity to show up. So clearly you two charmed the charm to make the dreamer dream of one of you. Maybe you might find that funny, but I don't.
And as for your offer, you can stick your products where the sun doesn't shine.
Good day,
Hermione
By dinner time Hermione felt completely exhausted and frustrated. During all of her afternoon classes she was plagued by the images of her daydream and had to use all her willpower to concentrate on her classes.
She had just started with her dessert when the owl arrived, curious as to what they might have to say in their defence she opened the letter.
Dearest Hermione,
Well first of all your dream must have been marvellous if I was in it, so I don't understand your annoyance (and I feel insulted) and secondly the charm is designed so that you dream of someone that you fancy (I totally understand why you would fancy me, I mean I am sexy, funny, intelligent etc, etc., far more so than George for example, so don't deny it any longer). I am curious what did we do in your dream? And how did you know that it was me and not George who showed up.
Of course we would never think that such an intelligent and beautiful witch as yourself would be in need of a daydream charm.
Yours forever and for always,
Fred
Hermione groaned, oh no, now the git thought that she fancied him, and they still wouldn't admit to how their charm actually worked. Deciding that she had to correct his preposterous assumptions right away she scribbled an answer.
Fred,
Still not done with making fun of me? But don't you get too full of yourself. I would know if I would fancy you and I most certainly don't, even if you were the last man on earth.
As to what happened in my dream, I was sitting on the grass reading and then you showed up, that's it and I don't know how I knew that it was you I just did.
Hermione
After dinner Hermione went to the library to work on her Arithmancy essay and she even managed to forget about infuriating twins and steamy daydreams and got lost in the mystery of the numbers.
Satisfied again with herself and the world she went back to the common room. Harry was already waiting for her there with his newest findings on Malfoy. He told her that he couldn't find him on the marauder's map, that he seemed to disappear, and started speculating as to where he might go.
Hermione couldn't care less and soon her mind was invaded again by a certain red head with freckles, warm brown eyes and a mischievous smile (and that certain someone was not Ron). She sighed and hit her head as if trying to get the images out of her head. Harry looked at her in a strange way and asked if she was well. She cursed inwardly, made up a lame excuse and went to the dormitory.
There was already a fluffy little owl flying excitedly around her bed. Must be Pig's brother she thought. She got the letter and the owl collapsed on her bed. She carefully lifted him up and placed him on her pillow then she rummaged through her trunk to look for a treat for him, she only had the treats for crooks but the tiny owl didn't seem to mind and devoured hungrily what she gave him. She snuggled into her pillow and started reading.
Fair Hermione,
How often do I have to tell you that we are not making fun of you, my dearest. So you don't fancy me, huh? The Lady doth protest too much, methinks. (Aren't you impressed with my knowledge from muggle studies?). About that dream so you were reading and I was just…there? And what are you so upset about then (no I don't think you were lying but maybe omitting some things?).
This is Eugene by the way, I met him today in the pet shop where I was looking for an owl for my personal mail, he crashed right into my head it was love at first sight.
Sweet dreams princess,
Fred
Hermione giggled, next to her hooted Eugene and started jumping up and down excitedly. "Well hello Eugene", Hermione crooned, "pleased to meet you". Eugene chirped happily.
"Let me just write a short answer and then you can fly back home". Quickly Hermione grabbed her quill and parchment and started writing feeling strangely giddy.
My dear Fred,
I am deeply impressed with your knowledge on Shakespeare and glad that the entire Hogwarts education clearly was not wasted on you. But, I still believe that there is something fishy about your daydream charm and it will take time to regain the level of trust that I had in you before (which was not much to begin with). However I think I will forgive you this time.
And about the dream, maybe I omitted something, maybe I did not you will never know, I am upset because this is a matter of principle, you weren't supposed to be there in the first place.
Eugene is really cute, I think he likes me (do you think he is a close relative of Pigwidgeon?)
Sleep tight,
Hermione
That night Hermione had sweet dreams in which she was kissed soundly and held tight by a strong pair of arms that belonged to a certain slightly infuriating red head.