A/N - I have no idea don't judge me. This turned out really crackish and probably way out of character but it was fun. And i had to write it.
"Hook, how long until we leave Neverland?" Emma asked the pirate at the helm as she watched her son talk animatedly with his grandparents.
"Not long at all, Swan. Why?" Hook asked as he glanced over at the blonde.
"I just, never mind it's stupid." Emma said with a huff as she started to walk away. The pirate rolled his eyes and snagged his hook in her belt loops and pulled her back to him.
"Nothing you could ever want or ask is stupid." Hook told her in all seriousness. Emma sighed and bit her lip as she contemplated how to ask.
"Okay so if I tell you something, you have to promise not to laugh or interrupt until I'm finished okay?" She asked him and at his nod she took a deep breath before she spoke again. "Okay, here's the thing. Peter Pan was my favorite story growing up. I mean what orphan doesn't love the idea of a land where you never have to grow up and there are no grownups and you get to play all day. I always dreamed about going to Neverland and having an adventure and fighting the pirates. Then I meet you and you were nothing like I imagined, granted that has a bit to do with the versions I've seen in movies but anyway. Then we get here and the island is nothing like I hoped. I mean at one point I'm pretty sure the damn island tried to eat me. And nothing was like the stories I always hoped to be true." She trailed off watching as Hook's eyebrows knitted together as he followed along to her rambles.
"So what is it you want?" Hook asked her watching her expression as it became a bit like Henry's, all childlike and full of wonder. Emma's lips twitched and formed a smirk as she looked at him.
"I want you to call yourself a codfish," Emma mumbled quickly.
"I'm sorry lass, but I don't think I quite heard you." Hook told her with a raised eyebrow. Emma sighed and rolled her eyes.
"I want you to call yourself a codfish," Emma repeated crossing her arms across her chest as Hook burst into laughter. "Ugh see I told you it was stupid," she huffed out as Hook struggled to get his laughter under control. His laughter had drawn the attention of the other members of the crew on the deck and they were watching the pair interact.
"No, lass it's not stupid. But it is a rather odd request. Why would you have me liken myself to a fish?" Hook asked her as he struggled to contain his mirth.
"It's something Peter makes Hook say in the movie before he feeds him to the crocodile, or well makes him walk the plank the crocodile just happens to be there." Emma told him.
"Oh so you are planning to feed me to the crocodile are you?" Hook asked her, his lips turned up in a smirk.
"Pfft, no, but making you walk your own plank does have its appeal," Emma said with her own smirk. "Now say it."
"I don't think so, lass," he told her as he turned back to the wheel to keep them on course. Emma quickly reached out and stole his sword pointing it at him.
"What's the matter, Hook, are you afraid? Is the big bad Captain Hook afraid to say one little thing for me?" Emma taunted him. Charming had been on his way to break up whatever was about to happen, but Snow and Henry held him back.
"Oi, you take that back Swan. I am not afraid of anything." Hook insisted as he fixed the wheel so it wouldn't move off course as he moved to take his sword back. Emma just danced backwards out of reach.
"Ah ah, you can have this back after you say it," Emma called over to him as she hopped down the stairs and made her way across the deck.
"Never going to happen, now give me back my sword love." Hook repeated as he held out his good hand expectantly. Emma lowered the sword for a moment, tapping her free hand against her chin as she thought about what he said.
"Hmm, no," she said with a shake of her head and raising the sword again.
"The asking was me being a gentleman, and what you are doing could be considered mutiny." Hook said as he advanced yet again.
"Pfft, if anyone on this ship is captain it's me. You just get to do the steery thingy because you like it." Emma said with a smirk. "Now say it!" Hook sighed as he backed her against the rail and used his hook to snatch his sword back.
"Why is it so important to you that I do, love?" He asked, searching her eyes for a bit more of a reason.
"I just want one thing to be like the stories," Emma said with a sigh. "Please Killian." Hook let out a sigh of his own as he took a couple steps back and shook his head.
"Of course, this is what gets you to use my real name," He grumbled as he re-sheathed his sword. He looked back up at her and sighed again realizing he was lost. "I'm a codfish," he muttered with a roll of his eyes.
"I'm sorry, what was that?" Emma taunted as a smirk reformed on her face.
"I'm a codfish," Hook repeated a bit louder, but still shaking his head at her antics. Henry was trying and failing to stifle his giggling.
"A little bit louder there, Hook still can't hear you." Emma said with a small giggle.
"Bloody hell lass. I'm a codfish!" Hook said louder causing the entire royal family to fall over in a fit of giggles. Hook rolled his eyes and muttered something about blonde haired sirens being the death of him as he made his way back to the helm. A short time later after she had managed to collect herself she made her way back over to him and looked out across the sea.
"Thank you, Killian." She said with a small smile, letting the winds carry her voice back to him.
"Anytime lass."
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