Chapter 1: A Memory Unearthened
'Twas twilight that time, the same time I smell liquor from a distance. At first I thought maybe father was done drinking with his friends. I thought it'd be the same as four years ago, when mother carressed me in her arms, gently assuring me that I was no different with any other child. That I wasn't weird and that all I have is special birthmark on my left shoulder. But no, it wasn't. It was never going to be the same. For this time I know, this will be the last time my life will be normal.
Father came home that moment, drunk again as usual. Mother told me to go outside and play with the other children and I did. My thoughts at the time were perhaps mother would just tell father off again. She'd ask father if he cares about us at all. Father would then grab her by the wrist and thug her close to him. Afterwards, he'd snap at her and after a few moments they'd come out and tell me to come in again. But then just as I reminisced the somewhat bittersweet memories in my head, the sound of someone falling down hard echoed throughout a certain radius of the area. I then heard father call for me. At that time, I felt a lump of dread go through me as I try to fortell what he might do.
As I went to him, he immediately clutched my collar and pinned me to the wall. His eyes were as cold as snow storm when he glared at me. He then pulled the cloth near my left shoulder down and glanced at it as if trying to bear holes into it. I cringed. I never thought father's eyes could be so cold and unforgiving. Tears began falling down my face as I saw father had a blade in his other hand. "You know," he said. "I'd have loved you better if only you weren't born with that wrenched mark!" As soon as he said those words, He clutched the blade hard and tried to stab my left shoulder. But then, Mother came to my rescue and pushed father away and freed me from his grasp. "Run! Quick! Run before your father stands up again!" shouted my mother as she led me out of the house as fast as she could. As much as I want to hesitate, I still obeyed her, though only half-heartedly, and ran as far from the house as I could.
From a distance, I have seen father come out of the house and started shouting at mother. I knew he was after me and I subconsciously craved to fix the situation and so I ran towards them. Father then pushed mother away and lunged at me as if I were some demon about to strike. Mother then got in his way and he stabbed her at the back. "Mama!" I cried as I saw her fall to the ground. I have known for so long that mother was sick and that her health might turn for the worst one day. But I never expected that father himself would be the one to strike mother down. As I stared in shock from the previously traumatizing scene, father then tried stabbing me straight at the heart. I then realized that my own father really did want to kill me. I had no choice but to run and try to evade him for as long as I can. It was already much of a pain to live on and fight. Let alone fighting and fleeing to survive.
As I reached the far edges of our village, I saw an angry mob surrounding me. There in that crowd was everyone I knew including Meiyi, the sole child in our village chosen to become a concubine of our country's emperor. If I recall right, she confessed her undying love to me. We were young. In fact, too young...as young as 4-year-olds can be. I did have some feelings for her but I just disregarded it for I knew that incest was a dreaded taboo even amongst us in our village. I know fully well too that love was still not in front of my footsteps. "Dian hui", she said in her low gentle tone. "I can explain..." What is there for her to explain? I know they all seek my death. "They...they wanted to kill you, a celestial warrior...I tried hard to ward them away but they wouldn't...listen..." Her eyes were filled with tears as she said those words. But what can I do? I am merely an 8-year-old at the time afterall. "Kill him! Kill that devil's child," they all chanted. "Send him to the depths of hell!"
I knew not what to do then. Everything was happening too fast. First I see my father stab my mother in front of me and in the next moment everyone I know is trying to kill me. As if I did not belong to their village at all. The villagers knew not of my anxiety. They wouldn't care any more than they would if I were dead anyway. All they did was sharpen their tools and glared at me with disgust as if I were a vile creature of the desolate mountains. I couldn't take it anymore and that was what I knew for sure.
As the last bit of agonizing memories hit me, I felt a sudden surge of energy rushing within me. It was a great feeling. Probably as great as one might feel if he were high with drugs. I didn't know and the more I cared less. I felt I could just leave everything in a moment and finally relax and forget. The next thing I knew, there was blood everywhere and everything reeked of the smell of metal. The aura of the place changed all of the sudden. There were dead bodies everywhere even that I my beloved cousin. I looked around me and feel not a heartbeat at all. This so-called blessed gift from the foreign god my mother told me, has caused the lives of everyone in my life. I knew pretty well it was my fault and it was the pain that it brought that made me realize that the great things in life would not last forever.