Strange Incidents

Okay, I'm at it again and attempting to write yet another fic (humor possibly?) It's a bit pointless, like everything else I write. Everyone's bit out of character (like Numair) But hey, this is supposed to be humor. Of course everyone will be OOC. So sorry if you don't find this funny. I understand. I think.

Disclaimer: Same old boring disclaimer. I don't own anything! Okay?

All right, in this fic/incident I'm making fun of Alanna, and she's really OOC (in my last fic I made fun of Jon, hehe) So all you Alanna worshippers (as in WORSHIPPERS) and you people who don't have a sense of humor, DON'T READ!

Incident #1: Is That A Spider?

(Daine, Alanna, and Numair are in a very dusty/old attic. Uh oh)

Alanna: *COUGH*

Daine: *COUGH*

1 Numair: *COUGH*

Alanna: Copy *COUGH* cat.

Daine: That is *COUGH* not true!

Numair: Yea *COUGH* Alanna!

(Alanna glares at them)

Alanna: What is wrong *COUGH* with you, Numair? (a/n-check out 'Twas the Night Before Christmas)

Numair: Yea *COUGH* Numair.

(Daine and Alanna look at each other)

Daine: *blink blink*

Alanna: Okay…

Daine: Why'd we come *COUGH* here anyway?

Numair: Yea *COUGH* Alanna!

(Alanna and Daine choose to ignore him)

Alanna: It wasn't my *COUGH* idea.

Daine: It wasn't?

Alanna: No. It was *COUGH* Numair's!

Daine: *COUGH* Really?

Alanna: Yea.

Daine: Numair?

Numair: What?

Daine: Why'd you *COUGH* tell us to come up here?

Numair: I did not! *COUGH*

Daine: Are you *COUGH* sure?

Numair: Yes I'm *COUGH* sure!

Daine: Then who told us to come *COUGH* up here?

Alanna: Err…Daine?

Daine: Yea?

Alanna: Didn't you?

Daine: *blush* Oh…yea.

Alanna: *sigh* Well? *COUGH*

Numair: Yea *COUGH* Daine!

Daine: I have this problem *COUGH*

Alanna: And? *COUGH*

2 Numair: Yea *COUGH* Daine!

Daine: AAA*COUGH*HHHH! Can't you stop *COUGH* that?

3 Alanna: Can't we stop *COUGH* coughing?

Daine/Numair: NO!

Alanna: Fine!

Daine: Do you *COUGH* have a problem with *COUGH* coughing?

Alanna: Yes I do!

Daine: Well *COUGH COUGH* sorry *COUGH* Alanna *COUGH*

Alanna: OH STOP IT!

Numair: Yea *COUGH* Daine!

Alanna: That's it! I can't take it anymore! Stop coughing! I'M not coughing! You shouldn't either.

Daine: Fine.

Numair: Fine.

Daine: Copycat.

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

(Alanna walks away from them, ignoring them)

Alanna: *sigh*

(sits down on a dusty chair)

Alanna: *sigh*

(back to the argument)

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

(back to Alanna)

Alanna: *sigh*

(stands up)

(back to the argument again)

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Numair: Am not!

Daine: Are too!

Alanna: STOP THAT!!!

(silence)

Alanna: That's better.

Daine: He started it!

Numair: No I didn't!

Daine: Yes you did!

Numair: Did not!

Daine: Did too!

Numair: Did not!

Alanna: Oh not this again.

(walks toward the stairs when she sees something overhead, something big and black)

Alanna: Uh-oh.

(back at the argument, yet again!)

Daine: Did too!

Numair: Did not!

Daine: Did too!

Numair: Did not!

Daine: Did too!

Numair: Did not!

Daine: Did too!

Numair: Did not!

Daine: Did too!

Numair: Did not!

(back to Alanna, again)

Alanna: Tell me that that's not what I think it is. Please? (to no one in particular)

(thing starts crawling around the ceiling)

Alanna: Is that a spider? Tell me that's not a spider. TELL ME THAT'S NOT A SPIDER!!!

(spider "flies" towards Alanna)

Alanna: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!

(spider lands on her head)

ALANNA: HELP!!! GET OFF!!! GET OFF!!!

(argument is interrupted)

Daine: Was that Alanna?

Numair: Think so.

(both look in the same direction, Alanna is running around wildly, clawing at her head)

Daine/Numair: Okay…

Alanna: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Daine/Numair: Okay…

Alanna: DIE SPIDER! DIE!

Daine: Um…Alanna?

Alanna (who is too busy screaming) AAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Numair: Somebody stop that crazy woman!

(suddenly Onua runs in)

Daine: Onua!

Onua: Daine!

Alanna: STUPID SPIDERS!!!

Onua: Um…what's wrong with her?

Daine: I have no idea.

Numair: I think she's having a nervous breakdown.

(Myles walks in)

Myles: Actually, Alanna's always been afraid of spiders.

(walks out)

Daine/Numair/Onua: Okay…

Alanna: HELP ME!!!

Onua: Well that explains things.

(Daine and Numair nod)

(Alanna continues screaming)

Onua: Does someone want to help her?

(Daine walks up to Alanna)

Daine: Alanna?

(Alanna still continues to scream)

Daine: like *sigh*

(plucks innocent spider out of Alanna's hair)

(Alanna doesn't notice)

Daine: Um Alanna, you can stop screaming now.

Alanna: I can?

Daine: Yup.

Alanna: Okay.

Daine: Wanna get something to eat?

Alanna (grin): Sure.

(the two walk out)

Onua: *blink blink*