Nightmares
A/N: This is basically an R/C romance I thought up when I watched the Broadway version of the Phantom of the Opera for the first time. (So now whenever I see those signs saying "Remember Your First Time?" I'll think of mentally piecing together a fanfic. Sorry, lunatic ramblings)I know, I've often said I'm an E/C fan and writer, but I think R/C is such a great, sweet, romantic pairing, I wanted to experiment with it and see if I can write a good romance while remaining true to the original characters. Anyways, this is supposed to be a one shot, but it could turn into a chapter story. Who knows? So, enjoy
Summary: Even though Christine and Raoul are married and living happily together, Christine still can't put the past behind her. Nightmares of that horrible night in the Phantom's lair when Raoul nearly died still continue to haunt her every waking moment. No matter how Raoul tries to help her, she can't forget that night, and Raoul knows she never will until she makes peace with the past.
Christine smiled as she climbed into her warm soft bed. The sheets were still warm from the bed warmer the maid had used a few minutes ago, and smelled faintly of sweet lilac. She pulled off the matching robe to her pale blue nightgown and flung it over a nearby chair. Christine pulled the covers up to her chin, and laid back against the soft, plump pillows, soaking up all the luxuries she'd slowly become accustomed to over the last few months. Who could have ever imagined last year at this time that Christine Daae a lowly, orphaned chorus girl, would be who she was today, Mrs. Raoul de Changy, the Vicomtess de Changy, married to such a loving sweet husband most girls only dreamed of, and the richest woman in France to boot? It was too marvelous to believe. But it was true. She gazed around the room at the soft, warm gas lamps casting a muted, cheery glow everywhere. Her huge vanity table stood in the corner, next to a walk in closet filled with hundreds of luxurious, gorgeous gowns and the huge mirror. She stared at the canopy above her stretching over the bed, and her gaze wandered to Raoul's bedside table. On it were some account and business papers, a white glove she couldn't find the mate to, a cigar case, and a small portrait of her. Christine's eyes wandered to her own bedside table. The usual things; a tube of half used lipstick, an opened case of rouge, the latest novel she was reading, a half completed sampler, a hair comb, and some photographs of Raoul, her and Raoul on their wedding day, one of she and Meg at a ballet performance so long go, and the only remaining picture she had left of her father.
Christine couldn't believe how happy and secure she was. She hadn't worked ever again since the Opera Populaire. True, sometimes she so yearned for the feeling of performing in front of a crowd, the exhilaration of putting her heart and soul into singing. But, there were enough other activities to take her mind off singing. Ever since she'd become engaged to Raoul, her life had become nothing but frivolous pleasure seeking, a princess fairy-tale life with her Prince Charming, whirling around in beautiful, dazzling ball gowns at holiday balls and dances, social dinners, shopping sprees, charity events and fun sporting events. Christine had been a little awkward and new when first introduced to the strict, upper class society of France Raoul belonged to. Some people wouldn't accept the fact that she was a former chorus girl and ballet dancer. But Raoul had always encouraged her, and defended her no matter what she may have done. Eventually, people started warming up to her, and now she had dozens of great friends she always enjoyed entertaining and socializing with, and society loved her as much as she did them. At first, Christine felt uncomfortable having servants, spending any money on herself, accepting any gifts from Raoul, but now, to tell the truth, she loved it and she knew she had become quite spoiled, but Raoul loved providing for her, and making her so happy, so she eventually stopped objecting.
The only social event she and Raoul never attended was the Opera anymore. Christine hadn't wanted to accept the invitations, and Raoul understood that perfectly. He was very firm and insistent they would never go back to the Opera if Christine couldn't bear it, and often told people quite firmly they no longer took part in the theatrical arts and Christine supported him one hundred percent. He had even resigned his position as the Opera patron. And Christine hadn't sung a note since that horrific night at the Opera House, and she never would. She couldn't imagine ever going back there or singing again, especially not for any "Angel" she once believed in. And that was mainly the cause of her nightmares.
Ever since that horrific night in Erik's lair, when Raoul was almost killed, Christine's dreams were haunted by her remaining memories, and she suffered from sickening nightmares. Raoul was always there to comfort her and coax her back to sleep, but she still was afraid to go to sleep.
All her worries and fears about nightmares slowly drifted away when Raoul slid into bed next to her, pulling the covers up onto his body too. He turned towards her and smiled, kissing her as he did every night. She smiled with pleasure at the touch of his lips on hers, and kissed him back. He broke apart and grinned at her
"So, have a nice day sweetheart?" he asked, like always
" Of course. Veronique invited us to her engagement gala next month, and I finally found a wonderful assistant cook to help Bridgette out around here. Poor dear, always works so hard. I hope she'll be a better help than the last one"
"If you found her, I'm sure she will."
Christine smiled. Raoul always thought she was some perfect angel and everything she touched turned to gold. He squeezed her hand
"Oh, Christine, hon, you're so cold. Maybe you should put your robe back on. Or" he said, with a mischievous glint in his eye "Maybe I could warm you up"
Christine giggled "That sounds like a wonderful idea darling" She scooted over towards him and leaned her small body against his large, protective body, resting her head on his shoulder. He put his arms around her and kissed the top of her forehead
"Mmm, I think I like this idea better." Christine said lazily.
Raoul chuckled "I knew you would. And I assume you're much warmer now"
"I definitely am" Christine said sweetly. She turned around and kissed Raoul fiercely, moaning with pleasure and running her hands all over his chest. He broke apart, grinning
"Christine, oh god, please don't. If we start now, you know neither of us will ever get to sleep."
Christine pretended to pout for a moment "All right, if you insist. But you know I can't resist that long"
Raoul grinned "I know. But not tonight." He gently turned her around and began massaging her shoulders
"You're so stiff. You just need to relax and sit back. You've got a real knot here Christine"
She laughed "Since when have you become a masseuses?"
"I'm not. I just know how to please you"
She sighed "You're such a wonderful husband Raoul. I truly don't deserve you."
He stopped massaging her shoulders and hugged her "Oh yes you do. I couldn't live without you"
They were both silent for a minute, holding on to each other. Raoul finally broke the silence
"Oh, by the way, Mme. Livingston said she was going to come calling here tomorrow, and she's bringing the twins, Edward and Pierre."
"That'll be nice. They're such adorable little boys. I do envy her.
Oh Raoul,I can't wait until we have darling little boys of our own" Christine remarked absently.
Raoul smiled. He knew how much Christine wanted children to care for "Or darling little girls to care for. Don't worry, I promise, we'll have children of our own. Someday. But" he said, rolling over to his side of the bed "Tonight, we just need to go to sleep. All right love?"
Christine nodded and yawned "All right." They kissed each other briefly and turned out their bedside lights, plunging the room into complete darkness
"Good night Raoul"
"Sweet dreams, honey."
Christine sighed. She wished that would be true tonight.
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Christine wildly tossed and turned, calling out frantically in her sleep. Once again, she was thrown into her horrid, familiar nightmare of that terrifying hell.
It was dark and damp down in his lair. She was frightened, so frightened. He was mere inches from her face, threatening her with those eyes, those yellow, glowing eyes of death. His horrid unnaturally deformed face in front of her. Everywhere he looked it was there. She couldn't escape from it. She had to get away! He was closer and closer, forcing her against him, pressing his rank lips onto hers, ripping open the confining dress he'd forced her into.
Suddenly, thank god, he let go of her. Just in time, Raoul, her darling Raoul, had shown up to save her from him. But something was wrong.
He opened the gate, mockingly, to let Raoul in. But suddenly, faster than before, he had Raoul tied to the gate, trapped in that sickening lasso, helpless, and he was screaming at her to make her choice.
Christine looked at Raoul's pleading eyes. But she couldn't move. She too was helpless and at his mercy. She tried to run to Raoul's side, to free him, but she was paralyzed, rooted to the spot. She desperately tried to call out, but she had no voice, she couldn't even open her mouth. She was powerless.
He laughed evilly, taunting her. Oh god, that laughter. It haunted her, echoing over and over in her mind. He savagely grinned at her and screamed "It's too late! You've MADE your choice!"
He pulled the lasso, and Christine found her voice when she screamed as she heard the sickening crack of Raoul's neck breaking, his body limp and lifeless, scarlet blood rapidly gushing out into the lake. She screamed and screamed and screamed, but it was too late. Raoul was dead, and there was no one to protect her as the monster came towards her, screaming at her "There's no one left Christine! You've made your choice! You belong to ME!" and wrapped her in his dark cloak. She was in total darkness, there was no way out. He was smothering her in his darkness and haunting visions f lashed before her eyes; his evil, deformed face cruelly laughing mockingly at her, those yellow eyes, Raoul's lifeless body tied against the gate, his blood staining her white gown. There was no way out of the darkness, no way out. She screamed but no one heard. There was no way out...
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"Christine! Christine! Christine, honey, wake up!" Raoul cried
"No! No! Help me! Somebody help me! Oh, god, let go of me! Let me go! Let me go!"
"CHRISTINE!" Raoul screamed
Christine was jolted awake to find herself thrashing wildly in Raoul's comfortingly strong arms. She was panting and shaking. She looked up at Raoul's concerned face a few inches from her. She was still panting wildly. He drew her into a protective embrace, holding her still against him comfortingly
"Christine! Honey, wake up. Come on Christine, it's all right. It's all over now. You were just having another bad dream. It's okay"
"No it's not Raoul! He can still find me! I know he can! He's going to come take me again and kill you!"
"Christine, shhh. Calm down honey. It was just a nightmare-"
"But, Raoul, it was so real! It felt so real. Oh god, he's still out there looking for me. I know he is."
"Christine, darling, don't get hysterical. You're perfectly safe here. You know that. And I'll always be right here with you. Always"
"Oh god. Oh god"
"Shhh, Christine calm down. That's it. Now take some deep breathes. That's it, there's my good girl."
He rang for Christine's lady maid "Olivia, could you bring up a glass of warm milk please? Thank you"
He rubbed Christine's arms soothingly "Now honey, tell me what's wrong. What was it this time?"
"Oh Raoul, I was so frightened. I was down in his lair again and he had you down there and he was screaming at me and I couldn't do anything and he killed you! It happened again Raoul."
Christine was trembling violently. Raoul held her still against him and brushed the tears gently from her face and smoothed her curls that had come loose out of her face. She cried into his nightshirt. He took the cup of warm milk gratefully from Olivia, mouthed "Thank you" to her and gently tilted Christine's head back and let her drink. She did, and then continued.
"I hate these nightmares Raoul! I hate them! They seem so real and sometimes I can't believe they're really nightmares. I think they're real, that someday we'll have to go through it all again, and then it will really happen."
Raoul knew Christine was just tired and upset and so frightened she didn't know what she was saying and was just babbling.
"Christine, you know it was just a nightmare. It's not real. It's all in your mind. Once you just relax and get used to being safe and secure and forget about it, they'll go away."
"No they won't Raoul! I've tried to forget about it! The past two years I've tried to forget about it! I can't and I never will! Do you think that I want to remember that night?"
"No, I don't. But Christine, I know how horrible it was for you. I was there, I went through it, and I understand it must have been ten times worse for you. I know that sweetheart. You'll be fine. It's all over now, over and done with. Come on, just lay down."
"I can't go back to sleep Raoul. I'm scared to. What if I dream the same thing again?"
"Here. Lie against me, that's it. Just calm down and think of quiet, pleasant things. That's it. Don't worry, I'm right here with you, and I'm going to be right here with you the whole night. You're safe, Christine. I'm here."
Eventually, Christine calmed down enough and went back to sleep. But this time, it wasn't she that was lying awake. It was Raoul. That was the third time she's had that nightmare this week he thought. And I lost count of how many times this month. Hardly a night went by where Christine's screaming and thrashing about in bed didn't instantly jerk Raoul awake, where he had to forcibly hold her still against him until she woke up and calmed down. Then they'd go through the same thing as always; Christine's hysterical panting and sobbing, Raoul's soft, comforting words, Christine's ramblings and Raoul's gentle coaxing to go back to sleep in his arms. It was almost like a set routine. Raoul just didn't know why she still suffered from these nightmares. It had been two years since the disaster at the Opera Populaire. Why did it still continue to haunt her?
Raoul gave up trying to solve the puzzle. Some things just couldn't be explained. Maybe, when Christine finally made peace with the past and put it behind her, the nightmares would stop. Maybe not right away, but he knew Christine would eventually make peace with the past and then the nightmares would stop. Raoul was just glad he had been able to comfort his wife tonight back into a gentle slumber. As it should be.
Because eventually, the nightmares would stop, and Raoul eagerly awaited that day. But, for tonight, everything was as it should be, and Raoul was glad he had comforted Christine like any good husband should.
Eventually, the nightmares would stop...
So, what do you think? A shameless use of R/C fluff and italics? Or a decent R/C fluffy oneshot? For now, this will probably stay a oneshot, but if anyone would really like me continue and make this a chapter story, leave a review and let me know! Thanks for reading!