The Taming of the Mean Girl

A/N: I don't like Sokai … in fact I don't really like Kairi. But my stories don't care about my opinion, they still write themselves. So SoraxKairi this is. And when I thought up the story, this was the first couple to come to mind. So, if you're like me and don't like Sokai, don't bother reading cause there'll be no Soriku and no yaoi. If you do like Sokai or just don't care, please read. I'm already having fun writing this story and I swear the idea just came out of nowhere! So please read and review if you like it. (If you haven't guessed, this is based off Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew)

Warnings: some sexual innuendo, some adult language, all out Sora-ness

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom hearts, Final Fantasy, or Shakespeare's works (obviously)

Chapter 1: A Shrew is a small mammal, not a grown woman

You know what? I don't get Shakespeare. I remember the other kids in drama class were laughing at this play. I never saw what was funny. I mean the mean girl is now being controlled by her husband because he felt her could tame her. And her sister, the nice one, ends up being the evil devil bitch or something. How's that funny?

Oh, I should probably introduce myself. See, I'm Sora, Sora Strife. My dad, Cloud Strife, is an army man. Everyone loves him. My mom, Aerith Gainsborough (I don't know why she kept her maiden name), is a doctor. Well, a pediatrician to be exact (she sometimes sells flowers on the side, too). Everyone loves her. My older sister, Vanille, is the dancer of the family (she teaches ballet on weekends). I haven't met anyone who doesn't look up to her like a role model (even if she dyed her hair a reddish pink … why can't I dye my hair then, huh?). My older brother, Roxas, is the singer. He'll make it big apparently. Me? I'm the actor … and apparently, my dreams aren't worth jack shit. Not that my family and friends aren't supportive, cause they are, but everyone in town feels that actors never make it big. If they're as popular as Angelina Jolie or Hugh Jackman, they'd probably paid to get where they are. These are people with talent, everyone in my town just thinks otherwise because they only see the drama in Hollywood. I don't want to act for the fame anyway, I just love how it represents freedom and the chance to be anyone but you. No one else really gets it but Rox, and he's closest to my age so of course he gets it. He always gets it.

Anyway, back to the introduction. I'm currently fifteen (Roxas being seventeen and Vanille being nineteen). I'm now sophomore in high school and a B student at that. My hobbies are acting, playing video games and fawning over the next hot girl I see. I'm a highly sociable creature by nature, though no one ever wants to talk to me. My hair defies gravity, my eyes are clear blue, I'm short and proud of it and I currently have a problem.

Well, let me start off by explaining my high school. Large, three stories and full of the most judgmental people I've ever met. It's full of cliques. Yeah, I mean the popular girls, the jocks, the groupies, the losers, the nerd, the stoners, the skaters (though I do skateboard myself, but I don't hang out with them), the goths, and the newbies. There are more but I'm feeling lazy right now. And I … well I don't really have a group. I always hang out with my best friend since childhood, he's Roxas' age but that didn't matter to me. He's Riku, one of those quiet and mysterious "sex gods" as the girls like to call him. This automatically made him popular. Unfortunately for me, I'm not. So any time I get near him, the women growl at me like I'm a threat to their territory. Whatever, like I care. I can deal. No, that's not my problem. My problem happens to be the most popular girl in school.

Kairi Santoni. She's fifteen as well, about an inch shorter than me and the toughest bitch you will ever meet. And she happens to be my drama partner as of this quarter and for the rest of the year. Not only could she kick my ass five times in ten seconds, but she can do it with fake nails and in high heels. Not to mention she hates me. Don't ask why, she just does. She had to go and sign up for drama, my sanctuary and the only place in that school I like. Not that she's got no talent, because damn that girl can act! But still, I'd feel better if my safe haven wasn't overrun by a psycho redhead. Remember how I said I wasn't popular? That all changes on stage. I can actually say things like:

"Roxas! I almost got fangirl raped!"

"Wha—Sora, what the fuck? Can't you see I'm a little busy—"

"Yeah yeah, making out with Naminé, but anyway I almost got fangirl raped!"

"What do you mean, you almost got—oh."

That was an interesting day. But my point is it's not like that anywhere else. For me, the only time people are shouting my name off stage are when I'm in trouble with some member of the female sex. And I can't act right when Kairi's glaring at me twenty four-seven. Oh and this is the best part. Guess who're playing Katherine and Petruchio. Yeah, that's right. Kairi and me. Fuck my life!

"Sora, you have to get into the role more! C'mon, I know you can do this!" Ms. Heartilly kept yelling at me. I know she has faith in me, everyone in this room does. That still doesn't make me feel any better when Kairi's staring at me like I'd stolen all her money or something.

"Y-y-you are called p-plain K-k-kate and b-bonny K-ka—"

"Okay, I think that's enough. You can all get ready for lunch now or something, we'll try this again tomorrow," Ms. Heartilly said, shrugging her jacket with the angel wings on the back onto her shoulders. I swear she wears that thing every day.

The fact that we could all go to lunch helped though. I hadn't eaten breakfast, much to my mom's chagrin, so I was basically running on kool-aid and a stick of paopu flavored gum.

And remember those cliques? Well, they don't disappear. Here's how my lunch period usually goes. I try to buy my lunch in a line full of obnoxious line-cutters. I go to sit by Riku since I'm pretty welcome at the senior table this year. I get greeted nicely by Riku, his girlfriend (you'll find this hilarious, her name is the same as his except it has two Ks. Rikku!), my brother, his girlfriend Naminé, my friends Selphie and Wakka (who are actually my age), my other best friend Tidus and then … Well I get glared at by Kairi who's dating my other best friend Tidus. The table gets uncomfortable, Kairi glares at me all lunch which causes Roxas to glare at her all lunch long and Tidus to feel extremely uncomfortable. Somewhere in there, Roxas' friends Demyx and Axel show up and make everyone less awkward with some random joke. Then they get in trouble with some teacher walking by and Roxas has to leave and explain what they were doing which leaves Kairi to glare at me some more and causes me to cling to Naminé who would still be somewhat confused through all of this. Then Roxas would come back and pat my head and I'd stick my tongue out at Kairi who would then scoff angrily and leave the table. Then Tidus would follow her and everyone would go silent. Then Rikku would say something to break the silence and we would all laugh and silently thank her for the distraction. Today would be no different.

"Oh! Oh, oh! I think I know what's wrong with Santoni now! She snorted pixie sticks the wrong way!" Rikku laughed. We all laughed with her as Riku shook his head.

"Ri, there's no right way to snort pixie sticks. And I can't really see her doing that …" he pointed out.

"Well, you never know! What if she does it on the side, you never really know what people do in their free time nowadays. Like no one would've guessed you watch—"

"No one needs to know that Rikku."

Everyone laughed and tried to pester Riku into telling them what he doesn't want them to know he watches. He just ignored everyone.

"But seriously, I want to know why Kairi hates Sora so much …" Naminé said.

"They knew each other when they were younger," Roxas said, squeezing Naminé's shoulder.

"Yeah, back when Kairi's hair was short and she didn't want to kill me every ten seconds. I think she just sees me as a constant reminder of her childhood. I don't know why she'd want to forget it though, she always seemed fine to me …" I offered.

"Family problems, maybe?" Rikku asked.

"She wasn't the type of person to keep things like that to herself," I told her. And it's true; Kairi was always a blabber mouth, telling me everything. Then, all of a sudden, she just stopped talking to me. Did she tell me something she now doesn't want me to know?

"Well whatever her problem is, she needs to confront you about it and stop glaring at you like you're some kind of demon. She's this close to me ringing her nec—"

"Roxas!"

"What? Naminé, all she does is glare at my little brother! It's creepy as fuck!"

"She has to have a reason …" Naminé sighed.

"I just wish I knew it …" I mumbled.

"Well, cheer up Sora. I'm sure when she's ready, she'll tell you. She couldn't possibly actually hate you. Tidus wouldn't even date her if she hated his friends. Maybe he even knows why she acts that way and Kairi won't let him tell," Riku said.

"And anyway, you're partners with her in drama class, right? It's not like she never sees you …" Rikku offered. That just made me more depressed.

"Rikku, you just brought up a sore spot," Roxas said.

"Huh?"

"He can't act when Kairi's around because she glares at him all the time…"

"Aww, poor Sora!" Rikku yelled, glomping me in a very 'Rikku' like fashion. And trust me, it hurts when Rikku glomps you.

"It's okay, Rikku. Ms. Heartilly is very patient and anyway, I have Olette and Pence there for company," I said, prying the blonde girl off of me and pushing her towards Riku.

"Oh yeah, I forgot they took drama too," Roxas mused silently.

"Well, it's good that Rinoa's there for you, but remember she's going to be gone for two months since she's marrying her boyfriend, Squall, and they're having a honeymoon in Paris," Naminé said.

"And you know this how?" Riku asked her.

"Rinoa's my cousin."

"Oh."

"I know Ms. Heartilly is getting married but I sure wish she could've stayed a little bit longer. At least until second quarter ended. I mean, I know that's being selfish, but there aren't very many supportive substitutes since they don't know the kids they're teaching that well …" I sighed.

"I'm sure Ms. Heartilly will ask for someone she trusts to be her substitute her classes. If Ms. Heartilly trusts them then you should," Rikku said and everyone nodded in agreement. I sighed and nodded as well, although I didn't feel very much reassured at anything. In two days, I'd have to deal with Kairi on my own and when Ms. Heartilly … well, Mrs. Leonhart comes back in two months, she may or may not have a Petruchio. Since I might be dead by then.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"So …"

"So …"

"Eheh … so, um, Tidus?"

"Uh … yeah Sora?"

"So, yeah I was wondering …"

"Sora, you sound like you're trying to ask him out."

"Shut up Selphie! Tidus, do you think you could—"

"Tidus, why does Kairi hate Sora so much?"

Dammit Selphie, I'm supposed to ask!

Currently, I was walking home alongside Tidus, Selphie, and Wakka. Kairi has some club going on every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday (and today is Wednesday if you were wondering) so I had a chance to ask Tidus if he knew why Kairi hates me. I know, I could have done this much earlier in the year, but I wasn't thinking alright! I was a little scared his girlfriend would rip my entrails out.

"I couldn't tell ya man, she doesn't even tell me why …" Tidus said. Great, that's such a big help.

"Then why do you put up with her? I mean, Sora is your best friend …" Selphie pushed.

"I know, I know. It's not like she ever says anything though, right? I guess it's just her problem, though I do think she should talk to you about it," Tidus said to me.

"That's what I've been getting all day!" I huffed.

"Then talk to her."

"Excuse me? No way in hell, she looks like she wants to kill me when I'm just saying my lines to her in drama class!"

"Well maybe she's mad that you're not going to her," Tidus cut in.

"Hey, she should be the one talking to Sora about it! It is her problem!" Selphie yelled.

"Selphie calm down, we'll figure something out for the kid," Wakka said, placing his hands on her shoulders in comfort. My eye twitched a little at being called a kid but I let it slide.

"This entire day has just been an unhelpful pain in my ass," I pouted.

"Aww, cheer up Sora. We are here to help you! After all, what are friends for?" Selphie said with her usual smile. I couldn't even smile back, my thoughts just kept going back to how much I'm not looking forward to Friday. The day Ms. Heartilly leaves. I'm screwed.

"Look, Sora. You'll be fine. Kairi's not all that bad …" Tidus said.

Don't I know it.

"You say that like you're not sure," Selphie said.

Tidus looked a little … bummed out.

"Well, we have been having some arguments. But I'm sure it'll work out …" he said.

"Puh-lease! If you guys break up, you can just date that cute girl Yuna from my AP Physics class!" Selphie sang.

"Selphie!" Tidus and I yelled at the same time.

"What, I'm just saying!"

"Look, it doesn't matter anyway! I'll figure this out on my own. And anyway, I need to practice my lines! I haven't read this play since sixth grade!" I shouted running towards my house.

Yeah, I kind of already have the entire lay memorized but I needed to get away for a moment. All this talk of relationships wasn't floating my boat. My experience with girls ends with Selphie and she kissed me. Then it was awkward between us for a week before we decided to stay friends. And what's worse, I used to like Kairi. Now she just scares me, so Tidus can have her! Anyway …

"I'm home!" I shouted, walking through the back door (pfft … back door. Shut up, I blame Family Guy) since no one ever really uses our front door unless they're mail men, business men, or just have never been here before.

"Hey, Sora, can you do me a favor and walk Moonlight? I just got home from work and I have to start dinner …" my mom said from the kitchen.

"No problem."

I didn't really mind walking Moonlight. She's a black lab who loves people too much but she's at least calm when I take her for walks. And I'm usually the only one who walks her since Roxas usually does his homework at Naminé's house and Vanille is teaching at the studio around this time. And I know my mom was really tired having to deal with so many children in one day. She might as well be teaching Kindergarten. I whistled and Moonlight bounded down the stairs and jumped on me, to which mom ran out of the kitchen to see what was wrong then started laughing when she saw me struggling to push this darn dog off of me.

"She certainly loves you …" mom giggled.

"Yeah, but her love is a bit too painful. Does this count as an abusive relationship?" I grunted as I finally got Moonlight off my stomach.

"Sure sweetie …" mom shook her head and made her way back into the kitchen.

I shook my head as well and grabbed Monnlight's leash. We basically walked around the neighborhood and through the park near my school. The entire time I went over the lines of the play in my head over and over again. It's my method of memorizing them and keeping them in my head. I don't really need the method by now but old habits die hard and I'd been doing this since third grade.

One thing I can say about Shakespeare is that the language gives me a good challenge. I never liked easy roles, they were always boring as all hell basically. I liked having roles where I had to speak in a different dialect or even another language. I liked roles where I could use my imagination or explore certain parts of my personality that even I might not have known. Shakespeare just does that for me, especially his comedies like the play we're doing now. Although, if it were my choice, we would've done A Midsummer's Night's Dream or Much Ado about Nothing (although I'd rather not be Benedick or Bottom). Oh well, I'll have to put up with being Petruchio and marrying … Katherine. It's scary how well she fits the character. I think Moonlight could sense my distress too because she kept whining and trying to jump up and lick my face which I was not having!

"Alright, Moonlight, that's it! You want my love, you work for it!" I shouted, pouncing on her and wrestling with her. What? Like you've never talked to your dog or wrestled with it! Don't mock me!

"Sora?"

Huh?

"Wh-what are you doing?"

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

A/N: CLIFFHANGER! Tell me what you think please! Like I said, writing this story is getting to be really fun! I've always wanted to write something from Sora's point of view anyway, I just wanted to see what I could do with it without making him hyper off sugar all the time! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go in my room in cry cause I just watched Zack's death in FFVII Crisis Core (seriously emotional, I mean c'mon he was one of my favorite characters!) Review!