Summary: Unable to return home for Christmas, Lindsay spends her first Christmas away from her family. Danny realizes that she is unhappy and decides to cheer her up. (Set during season 3)
A/N : This story mentions Lindsay's past, but because I didn't want to darken the story, and don't know what her 'dark past' is I don't say much about it.
Snowflakes
Snowflakes fell upon the city, creating glowing halos around the streetlights. In her apartment, Lindsay rested her forehead against a window and sighed. She gently touched the condensation on the window, and watched a drop form and travel in a rivulet down the window. It was mid-afternoon on Christmas Eve, and Lindsay had gone home for the day an hour earlier. Two inches of snow lay on the ground, and by morning over a foot more was expected to fall. Lindsay was reminded of her home—of Montana—where the snow already lay three feet deep.
Montana, where most of the family would gather tomorrow, and where, for the first time in her life, Lindsay couldn't be. She had been lucky enough last year to have gotten the time off to go back home for Christmas, but this time she couldn't. She had called her family to say that she couldn't come home, and as a result she had several packages from them in her living room. She knew not to open her presents until Christmas Day, as tempting as it was not to wait, but she also knew that opening them in the morning meant that she would be opening the gifts close to when they would be opening the ones she had sent.
She could imagine them all in the large ranch home her father had built. Her parents would try to make sure everything went smoothly, while her brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins, brother and sisters-in-law, nieces, and nephews made life hectic. Her younger sister Erica would be home from college in Washington, and probably bring a boyfriend. Her younger brother Derek, the baby of the family, would be back from college in California, still a swinging single. Lauren, the second oldest, would be there with her husband Albert and their children Samuel, Anna, and Brian—ages nine, six, and four. Benjamin, the third oldest and older than Lindsay by a year, would be there with his wife Melissa and their children Marie, Christopher, Hannah, and Wesley—ages six, five, three, and one. Joseph, the oldest, wouldn't be there either. He was fighting in Iraq, and being career military, he wouldn't be home for some time. Joseph had taken after their grandfather, for whom he had been named. Their grandfather had been a World War II veteran and always talked about fighting for America, causing Joseph to have that desire from an early age. Joseph's wife Arianna and their children Shannon, Madison, and Kyle, ages thirteen, ten, and seven, would all be at the ranch as well.
Lindsay could hear the sounds of the children laughing and playing, and see their excitement while opening their presents. She could smell the food as it was cooked and served. She could also smell the firewood burning and the wooden piney smell of the house. She could hear the piano being played and carols being sung slightly off key. She could see the smiles on the faces of her family members as they talked and joked. She could see the dogs begging for food, and the cats hiding from her nephews.
In the evening, when things settled down, her aunts, uncles, and cousins would head home, and the rest of her family would go to bed. Her nieces and nephews would be given the dens and living room to sleep in, and Shannon would complain that she needed her own room. Eventually everyone would stop fussing, playing, or talking, and fall asleep. Lindsay was sorry that she'd miss all of it.
With another sigh she left the window, and walked to her small, pre-lit Christmas Tree where the packages her family had sent lay. She picked one up and then another, turning them a few times before returning to her current pastime—snowflake watching.
Meanwhile in the crime lab…
"What do you think we should do," Danny asked Stella.
She turned to her colleague, completely confused. "About what?"
Danny shook his head a bit, realizing that his question had come from nowhere from her perspective. "Sorry, I was thinking to myself and…"
"You figured that you'd invite me to join in on the conversation," she finished with a smile.
"Yeah, something like that. I was wondering what we could do for Christmas, me, you, Lindsay, Mac, we don't really have people to spend Christmas with. Sure, I'll try to see my family for a bit, but the rest of you don't have people to see."
"All four of us work tomorrow, so we'll see each other on Christmas. Unless it's mostly Lindsay that you're worried about."
Her statement made him pause; then he half smiled. "Hey, I just figured she'd be homesick and the rest of us are lonely…"
"And you like her. Come on, don't look so surprised; it's an investigator's job to notice things." She paused a moment, and then said, "She cares for you too you know."
"Yeah, I know, but she says it's complicated."
She shrugged. "So what? Go over to her place after our shift is over and see if she wants company. I don't think she'll say no."
Danny nodded and Stella smiled again, then they both returned to their work.
Early evening…
Holding his coat tightly against his body, Danny left the subway and walked into the cold evening air. By that time only a few flurries were falling; however, the second wave of snow showers would come around midnight and not let up for hours. He ducked his heat to protect his face from the wind, and started walking. At his feet the snow crunched and swirled as it drifted against the buildings.
He paused for a moment to look around and see how much further he had to walk. To his surprise, Lindsay's apartment building lay just across the street. He paused a moment, wondering what would happen when he knocked on her door. Then he took a deep breath, shoved his hands deep into his coat pockets, and walked to the building.
In her apartment, Lindsay sat on a chair playing her violin fast and powerfully. A dull ache in her chest had formed, and wouldn't go away. Slowly tears fell from her eyes, so she closed them to slow the flow. Her mind became so lost and focused in the music, that for awhile she didn't hear the knocking at her door.
Finally broken out of her reverie, Lindsay set the violin and bow in their case on the floor, wiped her eyes with her sleeve, and looked through the peephole on her door. She was surprised to see Danny standing in the hallway, so surprised that she didn't respond at first to seeing him, but then she quickly opened the door.
"Hi," she said.
"Hey."
"What brings you here?"
"I just wanted to know if you'd like some company."
She smiled. "That'd be really nice. Come in." She stepped back so that he could go in, and then shut and locked the door.
"Do you want something to drink?"
"Sure, what do you have?"
She listed several different juices and sodas, and he settled on orange soda. A minute later, she brought in two glasses of soda and joined him on the sofa.
"I didn't know you played the violin," Danny said casually, breaking the awkward silence that had fallen.
"I've been playing since I was little. It helps me to relax."
He nodded, and then asked thoughtfully, "Are you ok? You looked like you'd been cryin' when I came in."
Her answer didn't come quickly, causing him to worry a little. "I miss my family. I've never spent Christmas away from them before. Last year I was lucky enough to get off so that I could go. But I didn't have the time or money this year. It kind of seems silly for a grown woman to feel homesick doesn't it?"
"No, not really. Your family is close?"
"Very. My parents try to have as many family members over as possible throughout the year, especially for the holidays. It's always a wonderful time. I'm glad you came over, I was really lonely."
"Well, it was my goal to keep you company, and to cheer you up if you were sad."
She grinned, "You have."
Silence threatened to fall again, so Danny put his glass down and turned to her, mustering what courage he could to say what he wanted to tell her. "Look, I know a few months ago you said that there were things stopping you from being in a relationship with me, but I want you to know that whatever it is won't change how I feel about you. I care about you Lindsay, that's why I came here. I want to have a relationship with you, and whatever is in your past we can work through together." He gently put a hand on her cheek, almost afraid that she'd pull away, but instead she did the same to him.
"I care about you too," she whispered, her voice full of emotion. Then, painfully, she took his hand away from her face. Seeing the pained expression on his face she didn't release his hand, but held on tightly, so he squeezed back. "I want you to know," she began, and then she proceeded to tell him the dark tale of why she was fearful of relationships. When she finished both of them were in tears.
He pulled her into an embrace and held her close. "Don't worry," he whispered into her ear. "I'll never let anything bad happen to you again. I'll protect you."
After a few moments, she lifter her head from his shoulder and looked into his eyes. Only an inch apart, they could feel each other's breath. "Thank you," she breathed, her voice tremulous. In that moment, with both of them emotionally charged and in a moment of closeness and openness, the attraction between them grew very powerful. They both began to breathe shallowly, and their eyes shifted from eyes to lips, each scanning the other with uncertainty. Then gently and briefly, like the touch of a butterfly, their lips touched. Sensing that there was no fear from Lindsay, Danny kissed her again, softly and tenderly. With a deep breath, they pulled away from one another, but still remained close.
Lindsay smiled brightly, pushing the bad memories they had just discussed back into the recesses of her mind, and changed the subject. "Why don't we talk," she suggested.
"What about," he asked back, also smiling.
"Anything," she replied.
So they talked about everything that came to mind. And for the first time that day, she forgot how much she missed her family. Hours later, Danny yawned and looked at a clock, it was nearly midnight.
Running a hand through his hair he said, "I should get goin'."
"Wow, I didn't realize how long we've been talking." She stood up and walked towards a window, beckoning for him to follow.
"What's up," he asked.
"Well it's not safe to be on the street this late," she explained. "Plus I don't think you should be going out in that." She motioned out the window and looked out, which he then did as well.
The snow was falling so thick and fast hat it was impossible to see the streetlights below.
"I agree, but what am I going to do?"
She shrugged. "Stay here for the night. The snow is supposed to stop at about six, and hopefully the streets will be cleared in enough time for you to go home and change before work. I have enough pillows and blankets for you to sleep on the sofa." The last part she said with a grin, causing Danny to shake his head.
"Gee thanks," he replied, with just a touch of sarcasm.
In response she put a hand on his cheek and caressed it gently; he reciprocated the gesture. "Just because we kissed doesn't mean I'm sharing my bed with you."
He cocked his head and raised an eyebrow. "You call what we did earlier kissing? Come here." With that, he drew her close and kissed her powerfully, until both were breathless.
"No," she beamed. "I call that a kiss."
"So the question then is, do you want to date me?"
"Yes."
"Good," her replied. He went to kiss her again, but this time, she kissed him first.
When their kiss ended, they stood next to one another for a moment, finally comfortable in the silence of each other's presence. "We should watch a movie. Why don't you find one on TV while I get stuff for you to sleep on, and in if I can manage it. There's also a variety of food in the kitchen cabinets if you want something to snack on."
"All right," he said. Then Danny went digging through her cabinets for food, while she went digging for bedclothes. Several minutes later, Lindsay came into the room holding a large fuzzy blanket, a pillow, and black pajamas. Danny had refilled both of their glasses, put chips into a bowel, and found a movie to watch.
"I'm impressed," she say, laying the blanket and pillow on the sofa. Then she held out the pajamas to him. "Here, these should fit. I had bought them for my brother, but then I got a better sale and didn't take these back."
"Are you sure you want to give 'em to me?"
"Yeah, just think of it as a Christmas present."
He took the garments from her and set them on the coffee table. "Thank you; they're very nice."
"You're welcome," she said with a smile. Then she sat next to him on the sofa, and covered both of them with the blanket. "I didn't know you watched older movies," she commented as they snuggled closely together.
"My mom always watched old movies. I came to like them too."
"I like 'Meet Me in Saint Louis' it's a good movie."
"Good," he replied. Then, seeing that it was past midnight, he added, "It's tomorrow. Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas."
Then they wrapped their arms around one another and kissed again. While the movie played, they fell asleep in each other's arms cuddled together on her sofa. And while they slept the snowflakes continued to fall on both New York City and the town in Montana where Lindsay's family would gather later that day. Lindsay's first Christmas away from home was not a lonely one, because she was able to spend it with someone she love who loved her just as much.
This was written for Lalenna's CSI Santa project, and even though she said it'd be ok to post it earlier, I decided that I'd wait just in case. I may continue it, I may not, right now I don't know.
This was my first CSI: NY fic, yay!