A/N: Sam is in the iCarly Studio, alone, a few minutes before Carly and Freddie arrive. She is writing something in her notebook, and it is represented in the first lines below. I invite you to read iTheReason and share more Sam's thoughts. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for read.

# Sam alone

"I'm sitting here writing in my notebook some notes that I never have shared with anyone yet, and I probably won't. Carly and Freddie will arrive soon to rehearsal iCarly and I have to do it fast. I know I'm always late but today I just decided to arrive before them because my mom is getting me crazy and overshadowing my mind while I only want understand it.
I have many words to get off my chest however I'm feeling empty. My mom never have been able to explain me about feelings and I don't know how change my bad behavior just by myself , so let's try to write something. I think about so many things and all I had seen but never noticed that I can translate it into my feelings since I can't take it anymore and I'm ashamed to tell Carly even she has been my best friend. I never wanted to be something for you since I have hated you for my whole life. I never will be able to show it and tell you all I want to be for you, now. Every word leads to another and I just can't sto".

# Sam decides write a poem, even it can be so weird to her.

"Emptiness

For you, I want to be the reason of everything,

For you, I want to be everything, even empty

For you, I want to be like the empty on your nights

For you, I want to be like nights when they are cold

For you, I want to be like cold because I can do fire

For you, I want to be like fire burning your mind

For you, I want to be the mind full ramblings

For you, I want to be ramblings when it is all

For you, I want to be all you have inside

For you, I want to be inside world

For you, I want to be your world and the sun

For you, I want to be like the sun lighting up your soul

For you, I want to be like a soul with a warmer heart

For you, I want to be like a heart with open arms to envolve you every day

For you, I want to be every day in your entire life

For you, I want to be your life and live it forever

For you, I want to be yours forever.

S.P."

"This forever would be like what the spring does for us because we can have winter but it doesn't means I could love you less..."

Sam starts to think it but doesn't write this time , when... -My thoughts were interrupted by Carly and Freddie entering the room-

(Sam quickly stops writing and puts the notebook inside her bag. She doesn't notice that the bag is still open and ...)

Hey Sam! Carly greeted Sam cheerfully.

Hi Carls, Sam replys enthusiasm lacking in her voice, "what's up?"

Hey, why are you in here all by yourself? Freddie asked Sam with his nub face.

Eh, nothing, I'm just checking a shopping list, my mom never buys me things anyway. She answered, chuckling slightly.

Ha, I get it. So your mom doesn't even try? Freddie teased, but Sam glared and he stopped smiling like the jerk he is.

"Whatever Frednerd, just forget about my mom, she's crazy. Let's start iCarly rehearsal." Sam commented, standing up off of the beanbag.

We have the rehearsal to do even though my mind was so far away from me. Sam decides just forget it.

Wait the chapter II to see what will happen.