I know. I am shocked and amazed as well. I don't get it either.

Ella's already laying on the floor of the office, dead from shock.

Because this is an actual chapter.

Of an actual Maximum Ride story.

Granted, it's not about the main characters. Well, it's slightly about Fang, because Fang rules.

But as you may have noticed, this is about Lissa. I know you all don't like Lissa. Heck, I didn't either before I really thought about it. But seriously, would Fang be kissing a girl that was bad news? Don't we trust Fang's judgement?

So.

Here's Lissa's story of friendship, love, and how all of that blows up in your face. :D

Chapter one

Book Nerd for Life

Sometimes, I just want to kill her. You know who I'm talking about. She's at your school, too. Maybe she's blond, maybe not. Maybe she's pretty, and maybe not. Maybe she has the biggest damn boobs you have ever seen in your life. Maybe she doesn't.

Either way, the Popular Girl is everywhere. She's rude, annoying, and backstabbing. One minute you think she's your friend, the next minute she's talking about you to the cute boy on the other side of the classroom.

Anyway.

I have to say that the PG here has got to be the worst. Crystal Jacobs is her name. She is one of the un-blond ones who get highlights to make their hair look blonder.

"So, Lissa," says Crystal. "Teach says we're getting some new kids. Two boys. Brothers, by the sound of it."

"Thanks for letting me know, Crystal," I say, not looking up from The Prisoner of Azkaban. Crystal always feels the need to inform me of unnecessary things. I really don't know why.

"Ugh, why are you always reading those things?" Alora, Crystal's sidekick, asks.

"You mean books?" I ask politely.

Alora looks disconcerted, but then says, "I mean those stupid books about what's-his-face. The guy with the scars."

"He only has one scar," I inform Alora while Crystal, who is now down the library row, supposedly looking at the old issues of Seventeen, shoots me death glares.

Alora's way-too-plucked eyebrows draw together. "Like it matters," she slams my book down onto the table. Danget, she lost my page!

"Hey!" I say loudly.

Crystal and Alora laugh cruelly. "That's Lissa," Crystal chokes out. "Book nerd for life."

I roll my eyes nonchalantly, but it still hurts. What, just because I like books that makes me a nerd? I guess so, in Crystal's book anyhow.

No pun intended.

"Is there a problem here?" says a voice from behind me.

Crystal stops laughing, and when she speaks, she sounds breathy. "No… we were just laughing at the fabulous joke Lissa just told!"

I stand up and turn around to face Alex Delbecq, my best friend since forever. I now understand why Crystal's gone all googly-eyed. See, Alex is tall, super-smart and pretty cute. If he wasn't my best friend, I'd totally like him.

"Hey Alex," I say calmly as Alora lets out a shrill giggle. I smirk at Alex and he gives me a pained expression.

"Ready to go, Liss?" Alex says sweetly, ignoring what I'm sure must be the death glares aimed at the back of my head.

"You bet," I tell Alex.

"Bye, uhm… what are your names again?" Alex looks innocently at Crystal and Alora as I turn to face them.

"Crystal Jacobs," she says forced-pleasantly.

"Alora Okamura," she says, swinging her long dark hair behind her.

Alex's smile is strained, but he says, "Okay. See you around, Alona. Christy."

They look murderous.

Outside, Alex's sister Jasmine, more commonly known as Jazz, is waiting in her beat-up truck that used to be Alex's dad's.

See, his dad died back in the fourth grade. That was pretty much what sealed the deal on our friendship; my dad had died the previous year, and so we had some stuff in common.

Alex and I swing into the back of the car laughing.

"What's so funny?" Jazz asks, adjusting her mirror. Jazz is pretty much the non-blond Barbie doll. She looks like Alex, really, same dark hair, same brownish-hazel eyes, same tan skin. She's also slender and very pretty. Basically, she's your perfect French girl.

"Well," Alex breathes. "Crystal and Alora—you know them, right?"

"Freshmen PG's? Yeah," Jazz glances at me in the mirror as she pulls out of the parking lot.

"Well, anyway," Alex continues. "They were being real bitches to Lissa. So I was like, what's your name again?"

"They were about ready to kill him," I agree, still laughing. "The only reason they didn't is 'cause they think he's cute."

Alex blushes. "Yeah. So then, they tell me their names, right, and I'm like, oh, that's nice, bye Alona, bye Christy."

Jazz giggles. "Wow, they must've been annoyed."

"Super annoyed," I conclude. "They think everyone knows who they are. Like, I could go to NYC and be all, oh, I know Crystal Jacobs, and the people over there will fawn over me by association."

"Especially since I'm a nerd," Alex concurs. "They think nerds have nothing better to do than worship them."

"Hey, Liss, you coming over or should I drop you?" Jazz asks.

"Ugh, I gotta go home. Evil essay due tomorrow that I probably should have started last week." I make a face at Jazz in the mirror.

After Jazz and Alex drive away, I enter the dark house. Mom still isn't home.

She's been working late a lot recently. I wonder if she's going on dates without telling me, and I feel anger rise up in my chest.

She doesn't belong to anyone but Dad! She doesn't need someone to take care of her! She's got me!

But I know that it's pointless to think about my mom going on secret dates, so I sit down at the computer to start my essay. My cat, Caniche, nuzzles against my legs.

If you're wondering, Caniche means puppy in French. That's why I gave that name to my kitten.

Well, the logic made sense at the time. Ah, better start that essay.

Using symbolism, the author shows that…

I can't stop thinking about what Crystal said. About those boys that were coming tomorrow.

I'm hit by an idea, so inconceivable… and yet… I've just conceived it, so now I'm trapped.

Now that I've got the idea, I can't get it out of my head. It's just perfect. These boys don't know me. They have no reason to believe that I'm a dorky little book nerd. It's brilliant.

I am now ready to commence Project Lissa Flynn: Book nerd to PG.

Wow.

I know, it's insanity that I even updated so before you get too mad at me for making a crappy story that isn't even about the flock, just remember: I cry easily. Don't be mean!!!

Well, I mean, yeah, criticize, but don't insult. Don't waste my time by flaming me. There's just no point. I'm not going to blow up at you, and I'm not going to quit this story just because some moron tells me it's stupid.

Or you know what? Flame me. At least I'll have something to entertain me.

So… uh… review, please!

And for those that know me and my obsession with Baby Names & meanings, Flynn, which I have chosen to be Lissa's last name, means "son of the red haired one."

Just for entertainment.