Hey ppl. Me and my friend decided to do a co-authored fic together because we have nothing better to do in History. Really, all we do is watch youtube. So, since Naruto is her fav anime, and I know a bit about it, we decided to write this. If you want an official summary, this is a study of teenagers and how certain people react to…situations. But this is really just crack/insanity. Note, this is for a more mature audience, since we say everything other than what actually happens. Also, my friend and I have only watched a total of 5 episodes…so OOC-ness is expected. In fact, this is probably one of the most OOC fics you'll ever read. I don't own anything, but I do have a Gaara plushie =) !
Gaara:...you emo...bitch...thing
Sasuke: That's the best you can do?
Gaara: Yes *looks down in shame*
Sasuke: Sad. Very Sad.
Gaara: Shut up! Just shut up! It's not like you could do any better!
Sasuke: Actually, I can you Lee-loving, gay a**, eyebrow less crybaby.
Gaara: So? You like Naruto...and your just insulting yourself. You cry in your emo corner all the time!
Sasuke: How do you kn- I...uh...mean...uh...
Gaara: Oh, everyone heard you. "Oh Naruto...please...more...not the whip NOT THE WHIP!" You'd be surprised how many were injured by Ino and Sakura... and blood loss from nosebleeds *coughKibacough*
Sasuke:*red* That's a lie! We never used a whip!
Gaara: Then why did I find this in your closet *holds up whip*
Sasuke: Why did Lee come into your house carrying chains and leave wearing a collar? And why were you in my closet?
Gaara: Where do you think I got the collar from?
Sasuke: You're the one who took my collar!
Gaara: And you stole my kitty ears!
Sasuke: GaaLee is worse than NaruSasu!
Gaara: So you do uke!
Sasuke: Only half the time!
Gaara: What, Naruto to hard for you to beat?
Sasuke: I hear you yelling more than Lee when I walked past your house. I think you need to soundproof your walls.
Gaara: And you need to soundproof the school, the headquarters, the mission rooms, the forest...
Sasuke: For you?
Gaara: You wish, don't you?
Sasuke: I...uh...well...
Gaara: I knew it! You are stalking me!
Sasuke: Where did that come from? It's totally off topic! If anyone is a stalker, it's you! How would you even know about the forest! It's too big for anyone to tell from the outside!
Gaara: So you do use the forest! And some people actually use the training grounds for what it was intended for.
Sasuke: Naruto said it was away from the training grounds. Damn it. I knew I shouldn't have listened to him.
Gaara: So I was right! I was faking to see if you were lying or not! HAH!
Sasuke: So I'm not the only one that fakes.
Gaara: Having suspicions about your boyfriend? Well, you can try staying faithful, but with Sakura, Ino, Itachi, and Neji...
Sasuke: What about you with Ten-Ten, Hinata, your brother Kankuro, and your sister Temari, and Shikamaru?
Gaara: Oh, you'd like to think I've been sleeping with my sister, wouldn't you? You know, incest is considered illegal, immoral, and wrong.
Sasuke: Okay. You're not sleeping with Temari. But you're not denying that you're sleeping with your brother. Besides, you don't care if something illegal, immoral, or wrong.
Gaara: Hey! That was a long time ago! Once!
Sasuke: Awww. Poor you. You didn't enjoy it enough. Or are you doing your best to resist all the temptations. Or maybe Kankuro didn't enjoy it enough.
Gaara: No. Kankuro sucked. And he has a creepy puppet fetish. Not my type at all.
Sasuke: So he was controlling you. You were the uke.
Gaara: No, He liked being controlled. He called me master.
Sasuke: Then why are you turning red? And avoiding eye contact?
Gaara: I was twelve! I didn't know what he was doing!
Sasuke: You started at a young age.
Gaara: Yes, yes I did.
Sasuke: You want to kiss me, don't you?
Gaara: Yes, yes I do.
Sasuke. Then do it.
Gaara: Fine. *tackles Sasuke, starts making out with him*
Sasuke: Gaara, too much!
Gaara: What, too fast for you? No wonder you like Naruto then, he always was a little on the slow side.
Lee: Gaara! What are you doing!
Gaara: Making out with Sasuke.
Lee: Why? Am I not good enough?
Gaara: Yes. After the no-sex rule, things went downhill from there.
Sasuke: A no-sex rule? Honestly?
Lee: It was umm... because I...
Gaara: He kept getting mad because he couldn't train 'cause his ass hurt too bad.
Lee: Actually, you made the no-sex rule because you didn't want to be the uke.
Gaara: Only because you kept complaining about the whip marks.
Sasuke: Whip marks?
Gaara: Uhhh... I forgot you were here. Go away!
Sasuke: You'll have to get off me first.
Gaara: I don't think I will. You're very comfortable to lay on.
Lee: *eye twitch*
Sasuke: I don't know if I should be happy or scared.
Gaara: Be happy bishies like me like to sit on you, be sad stalkers like Sakura like sitting on you.
Lee: And be happy I'm not strong enough to kill you.
Gaara: Would you lift the no-sex rule if I called you a bishi?
Lee: Will you be the uke for once?
Sasuke:*sigh* *slams head on ground*
Gaara: Fine.
Lee: Now get off Sasuke!
Gaara: But he's so comfy! Really, get over here! *pats Sasuke's stomach invitingly*
Sasuke: NO! IF YOU TOUCH ME, I WILL KILL YOU!
Gaara: Ignore him. He can't do anything if I hit this *Sasuke goes limp* pressure point.
Lee: I'm still not sitting on him.
Gaara: Why not?
Lee: Uh...
Naruto: No! Sas-uke! Why! Why did you kill him! I'll kill you! *tries hitting Gaara*
Lee: *tackles Naruto* He's mine. You won't hurt him.
Sasuke: *drools all over Gaara's hand*
Gaara: Ewww! Drool! Get it off get it off GET IT OFF!
Lee: I'm sorry, I won't touch drool.
Gaara: *starts crying*
Naruto: Wow, real man. Crying over drool.
Lee: Do you want me to take you home?
Gaara: *tackles Lee, still bawling* Waah! I want my mommy!
Lee: You know you don't have a mommy, right?
Gaara: Yes I do! I do have a mommy!
Naruto: Who, your mom is dead!
Lee: Don't say the d-word!
Gaara: Her name is Mrs. Fluffy-kins.
Lee: You might not want to say that out loud.
Gaara: *innocent puppy dog eyes* Why?
Lee: We're in public. People can hear you.
Gaara: *evil, creepy, scary voice* Let them hear. They'll die soon anyways. *creepy smile*
Naruto: Is he on medication for his 'issues'?
Lee: Sometimes he forgets to take it.
Gaara: That stuff is EVIL! It will mutate into bunnies and take over my brain!
Sasuke: *half-awake* Bunnies are fun.
Gaara: Bunnies are evil! Like girl scouts! They steal your soul and put them in the cookies!
Lee: I really think I should take you home.
Gaara: Yaaay, ice cream!
Lee: Okay.. *starts dragging Gaara home*
Naruto: Sooo...they're gone. We're alone. Finally...
Now, I'm probably gonna end every chappie with an implied scene. We've got over 40 pages written out in my notebook, so whenever I get off my lazy butt and type it up, you'll get a new chapter. We try to write every day, sometimes over the internet on the weekends, so you should get a good amount of reading with this. A little tip, it might have taken me 3 days to type this up, but reviews=love=happiness=a typing mood. So review. Please? I have interweb cookies!