I look back and forth between the two boys. My heart is racing. They both look like they could kill the other.
"STOP!" I yell running between them and pushing Yuki out of the way. "DON'T DO IT!"
Sasuke stuffs his hands in his pockets and scoffs. "You weren't worth my effort anyway," he spat as he turned and walked away. I lifted my hand to stop him, but realized it was useless. Slowly I lowered my hand and looked back at Yuki. What I saw scared me.
His eyes were dark. He looked furious, confused, and hurt all at the same time. Without a word to me, he turned his back on me and left. I wanted to scream, to yell out to him, but when I opened my mouth to say something, nothing came out. I fell to my knees and cried. I only knew one thing to do, and that was to as my best friend for help. Coincidently she was the girlfriend of Yuki's best friend. Maybe things would work out after all.
I slowly made my way to her house and knocked on the door. I had stopped crying by the time I got to her house, but my eyes were red and puffy. She ushered me inside and gave me somthing to drink as I told her what had happened.
"I think he hates me..." I ended pathetically. "Could you go console Yuki then? And bring him back? Because I'm not good at that, you are."
"Allright," Charly says getting to her feet. "Make yourself comfortable. I'll be back in a flash."
Just seconds after she walked out of the door, she walked back in. I looked at her with a puzzled expression on my face. "What is you decision?" she asked forcefully. "I need it in order to sonsole him."
"Tell him I love him!" I said as if it were the most obvious answer in the world.
"That'll work..." she
said as she left again, five minutes later she came back again. "Man
you are fast..."
"I called him," she said simply.
"I have answers though..."
"What did he say?!?!" I asked urgently.
"Well, he said it's a lot of information to process and he's been though a lot, so he's going to give today some thought at home." My heart sank. "Pretty logical when you think of it," she continued. "I sent Manabe over to talk to him about it in a subtle way. So...Manabe will probably say something like 'So, Roxanne loves you, eh? Whatcha gunna do now?'" She actually giggled. "Well, we'll hear from them soon."
My fists were shaking, and I'm sure my face was turning red. I could feel the heat radiating off of it. I actually hit her arm, hard. "YOU SENT MANABE!?!?!?!" My mind was reeling and I was going into a panic. "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?!?! YOU IDIOT!!!"
"Ow. Hey now...Manabe is the only one he talks to like that. It'll be okay. He probably won't end up there for a while. He has to work. Yuki will be less stressed by then." Then she actually had the nerve to pat me. "You pack a pretty stong punch."
"Want to see it again?" I threatened still shaking. It felt like my whole world was crashing down. You never leave things to Manabe! I was sure that Yuki was never going to speak to me again. "This isn't how it was supposed to happen!" I say sinking back to the floor.
"What? Did you want him to come running back into your arms right away?" she asked. 'Yes,' I thought miserably. "Look...he found out there was another guy. Almost got into a fight, and you stopped it. He felt rejected. Then found out that you love him. This is life, everyone needs time to process. It'll be okay."
I feel tears well up inside me,
but I hold them back. I felt like all I've done today was cry. We
sat in silence for the longest time. I don't even know how long it
really was, but it felt like an eternity. I didn't even notice that
Charly left the room for a while. When she came back she announced
that she had called Manabe on his cell. "There was no answer.
I'm hoping he didn't mess this up. Either he's at work or Yuki
knocked him out."
I gasped. "That would be horrible!"
She shrugged. "If that
happened, I wish I was there to see."
"WHY DID YOU SEND
HIM TO DO YOUR JOB ANYWAY!?" I suddenly shout at her.
"HEY! I did my job! I gave you the report! Yuki cheered up and stopped his sulking! I sent Manabe to check on him...BACK OFF! If you don't, I won't help anymore. Trust me okay? I know what I'm doing!"
"YOU never said he cheered up! You just said he had to think about it, which means he's possibly thinking of denying my feelings without EVER listening to me and it was YOUR job to get him back here!"
"...no it was my job to console the crying yuki."
"I ALSO said to bring him back!! You forgot the second part of your job!"
"I never agreed to that part"
"When you said yes, that means you agree to BOTH parts of the deal, not dumping them on your boyfriend!"
"I'm not going to Yuki's house until I hear back from Manabe. I'm doing my Job I'll get him back eventually."
"EVENTUALLY!?!?!?!" I start crying again, I just can't help it. I had lost hope "I'll never see him again."
"Yes you will!" She sighed impatiently. "Fine, I'll try Manabe again..." I dried up my tears hoping to hear somthing. "It's ringing." She pauses. "Hi Manabe..." My heart flips. He picked up! I couldn't get much out of their conversation. She just seemed to agree with him a lot. She mouthed to me "Talk talk talk talk talk...I might hang up on him." I signaled for her not to or else she'd be dead. Finally when the conversation was over, she turned to me.
"Okay here is what I got. And this is exactly how he told me:
Manabe: Hey Yuki
Yuki: How did you get in here?
Manabe: Some read haired kid let me in.
Yuki: Remind me to kill him later.
Manabe: So what are you going to do?
Yuki: About what?
Manabe: Roxanne.
Yuki: I don't know what you mean.
Manabe: You know you like her...
Yuki: Our relationship is hard to explain.
Manabe: Try me sits back in chair
Yuki: Long pause She says she loves me, but I wonder...if love is just a lie people tell? I want to be able to give her more than empty words.
Manabe: But is it how you feel?"
Charly paused. "I'm really thirsty, do you need a drink?" she said suddenly.
"NO! WHAT DID HE SAY!?" I yelled impatiently.
"All right! All right! Keep your pants on!" She cleared her throat and continued in her Manabe-mimicking way.
"Yuki: How can you put into words how you feel...If love is pain...then what I feel is ten times greater than that...
Manabe: So whats so explain? Oh wow...I'm late for work! I gotta go...if I get fired it's your butt Yuki!
Yuki: Just go you wise guy!
Manabe: Later Yun-Yun...oh and Yuki...call the girl!"
By the end I was in tears. Did he really love me? Or was all of this just causing him pain? "THAT'S IT! I'M GOING TO TALK TO HIM!" I decided. "Come with me?" I said weakly. I didn't know if I could do this on my own.
"...Are you sure...you want me there...when...you guys talk?"
"I don't know!" I sighed angrily. "MANABE IS SO USELESS!"
"Okay I'll go...but if it gets too mushy I'm gone," she said with a smile. "WAIT A MINUTE! THAT'S MY BOYFRIEND WE'RE TALKING ABOUT!"
"Okay fine...he was KINDA helpful..."
"More than kinda. But anyway, lets go come on!"
"But...uh...what if he doesn't want to talk to me? Am I just empty words really?"
"Come on! Of course once he see's you...He won't be able to keep those emotions all bottled up! He loves ya I know it...Manabe's knows it...and so does he...come on." I was still unsure.
"I don't know." I made a sound that sounded like a whining puppy dog.
She took my hand and dragged me out of her house. I obliged. Afterall, this was my idea, and then I had time to think of how stupid an idea it really was. I needed to give him time and space right now. But here I was, storming up to his house like an idiot. "I think I'm going to be sick..." I muttered quietly. It was true. My stomach was doing flips. I was so nervous.
"Well do it out here because once we're inside he won't wanna see that."
However crude, I gave her a half-smile. "No...I-I'm okay..."
"Good cause here we go. Hey look the doors unlocked..." To my horror, she opened the unlocked door and let herself in. I hit my forhead in disbelief. "Hello!? Anybody home!?" she called as she walked inside. Suddenly she stopped and started giglling uncontrolably. "That was a dumb question," she said once her laughter subsided. "Who leaves their door unlocked when their gone?"
"Who walks into a house that isn't theirs!" I whispered hanging just outside. "You can't do that!"
"Why not? They left it unlocked...evidently we're welcome" Just then, Tohru came around the corner and greeted them both with a smile. "Oh hey Tohru!"
"Idiot!" I whisper to Charly. I don't know why, but I laugh nervously when we see Tohru. I know she's not an angry person...but we did just enter her house without asking. How far can one person's patience go? But it's a good thing we ran into Tohru instead of that hot-tempered red-head though. "Oh hi Tohru... Um...we uh... well you see... we were passing by and... your door was unlocked... so..." I couldn't seem to form my words right.
"So where's Yuki?" Charly asked boldly. I nudged her hard in the ribs, but that didn't seem to have any affect on her.
"Oh he's upstairs in his room, would you like me to go get him for you?"
"Nah...we'll just go up thanks though..."
"Okay! Nice seeing you two again!" Tohru smiled like she always did.
"You too Tohru. Hey, you have to come over for some steak sometime. My treat." They said their goodbyes and Tohru went back into the kitchen. I was feeling light headed by now. I took a deep breath as Charly pulled my hand and dragged me upstairs. We arrived outside of Yuki's door. Charly looked at me expectantly, so I reached out, my hand shaking, and knocked weakly on the door. "Yuki?" I asked gently.
Charly smiled and patted me on the back. "That a girl...HEY YUKI!" I hit her again for being so obnoxious.
"SHUT
UP WILL YOU!" I wisper to her, but it's like she doesn't
hear me. After announcing her prescence she opens the door and lets
herself in. "Hey
Yuki...did
you hear us knock?
Roxanne's
here."
'Oh
my gosh I can't believe she just did that!' I think to myself.
If I get any more embarrassed, I think I might die. Why did I even
bring her along? I simply hover outside the door and look in. "Hi
Yuki," I managed to say.
He looked surprised to see us there. "Um...hey."
Charly nudges me a bit and I walk forward into the room. "Look...um about earlier...I think we need to talk..."
"Yeah I guess your right," he said. We stood in silence for a while. All this time over here and I hadn't prepared ANYTHING to say to him! I didn't know what to do. I just stood there like an idiot. I wanted to be anywhere but here right now. The horrible things he must think of me right now...
"Do you mean it?" he asked suddenly.
"What?" I was so surprised at the question. What was he talking about?
"When you said you...you loved me...did you mean it?" He got up from where he was sitting and walked forward.
I nodded. My tightly knotted stomach loosened slightly. "Of course I meant it. Yuki...the reason I stopped your fight with Sasuke...wasn't becasue I didn't believe in you. I was worried about you. I know what he can do, and I was scared. I wanted to protect you because I really care about you. I-I love you."
He was silent for a long time. 'Say something! Anything!' I pleaded silently.
When he finally did say something, it wasn't 'I love you too' or anything like that. He said, "I'm not so sure I love you."
My heart sank to the ground, yet I could feel it pounding in my head. Charly absolutely looked petrified of what she just heard. I couldn't look at either of them. I focused on my shoes and the carpet. "O-Oh...well..." Tears welled up inside. But I couldn't cry in front of Yuki. I wouldn't let myself. "If thats how you feel..." I needed to get out of here quickly. I felt so horribly rejected. The worst kind of rejection. I turned to leave. But as I did that, I felt Yuki grab my hand. I turned and looked at him surprised. What did he want now? But he wasn't angry or upset like I thought he might. He simply looked into my eyes and held my hand for a few seconds.
He took a deep breath and said. "If love is forgetting you own name at the sound of your voice, if it's forgetting to breath when I see you...if its...getting all nervous knowing you are going to be somewhere. If that's love...than I'm in it."
I suddenly can't hold my tears anymore. I cry and he pulls me closer into a hug. These tears were happy ones though. "I love you," he whispers in my ear.
"I love you too," I say inbetween sobs. I realize I must look like a right mess, so I quickly dry my tears at once feeling silly for crying like this. Afterall, it's not my most attractive side. If a guy can stand that, he can stand anything. Then, once I've regained my composure, I nudge him. "Don't ever scare me like that again," I said quite seriously.
Yuki laughed softly. "I wont..." he promised me.
All of a sudden we hear a loud crash. Apparently, Charly had tried to leave the room quietly and knocked over the side table on accident. "Um...so sorry...please...don't let me interupt...I'm gonna go...um..." She picked up the table as she continued to back out "...away..."
I looked back at Yuki and we both laughed.
"She's funny..." Yuki said with a smile. "But don't let her tell Manabe to come back okay?"
Manabe! I had forgotten about him. "I told her not to, but by the time I said it...it was too late..." I grinned sheepishly. "I'm sorry about that...he didn't torture you too much did he?"
"It's all right," Yuki said with a smile. "I'll live"
I smiled back and was content in Yuki's arms for a little while longer.
