Disclaimer: (Child pulls string on SeeN'Say. Big plastic arrow lands on picture of Amaxing)
Metallic Voice: 'The Amaxing says….' "I Don't Own One Piece!" CLICK CLUNK
Amaxing Fan Fiction Inc. Brainstorming Session.
Location Location Location: A meeting room in AFFI. Amaxing sits at the head of the table, a large blackboard behind him for writing ideas down. On his right sit AFFI's yellow-eyes Janitor, Nathan Amarillo, editor, Dante' Cervantes, marketing chief, Damon Alighieri, and Disclaimer Writer, Skyler. One his left sit Nami, Tony Tony Chopper, Sanji, and Zoro.
Amaxing cleared his throat. "Could I have everyone's attention please?" The eight peoples quieted. (Ouch, Dante, get over here and edit that!) "I'm sure you know all know why you're here today…" No one spoke. "You do know why you're all here today, right?"
"Isn't today muffin day?" asked Skyler.
"Muffin day is Friday for the n-teenth time" said Dante, already annoyed.
"Besides! He said there would be cotton candy!" said Chopper.
Cries of 'cotton candy!' and 'I love that stuff, where is it?' resounded throughout the conference room. It soon turned into a dull roar.
Amaxing looked over to Zoro. "Hey, buddy, could you quiet everyone down please?"
Zoro smirked. "Why should I do that? You don't own me, I don't have to do anything you say?"
"Do it, or I'll write a Sanji/Zoro yaoi.
"QUIET!!!!!" screamed Sanji and Zoro at the same time. The eight peoples quieted again.
"Now" Amaxing began "since everyone obviously missed/ignored/used for sword practice the memo, I'll tell you why we're here. Over the past few days it has come to my attention that several staff members wish to have a say in what goes into the fanfics that come out of AFFI. So, I've decided to cut you guys some slack and hear your ideas."
"All hail that great, just Amaxing!"
"Stop that brownnosing, Amarillo."
"Sorry."
"Alright! Let's get started. Any suggestions?"
Sanji's hand shot up into the air.
"Yes, go ahead, Sanji."
Sanji giggled. Repeatedly. Like a fan girl. Everyone looked at him strangely. "Well…" he began "I've had this idea for quite some time now…"
"Yes, well go on" said Amaxing, motioning Sanji to continue.
"I think that in your next story, you should make Nami-San accidentally eat the Hot-Hot fruit, but not be able to control her…powers…at first."
"The Hot-Hot fruit?" asked Amaxing. What's that?"
"Well, when eaten by a woman, the Hot-Hot fruit gives one the ability to infinitely expand the size of one's…"
SMACK! Sanji fell to the floor, unconscious. Nami clapped her hands together, sat back down, and gave Amaxing a warning look. "NO" she said. No one questioned this ruling.
Chopper raised his hand next. "I have an idea Mr. Amaxing, Sir."
"Please, just Amaxing, you don't work here."
"Right…I was hoping that maybe you could have someone eat a Reindeer-Reindeer fruit."
"Fair enough, Chopper, any preferences on who?"
"Oh!" Chopper said, turning pink. "Well, I really wouldn't care who as long as she was cute and maybe if she liked doctors it would be nice and…"
The entire room stared at Chopper. The shock was so resounding that Sanji sat up on the floor, as if he had been splashed with a bucket of cold water.
"Whoa!" Said Damon, brushing back his ridiculously long black bangs to get a better look at Chopper. "Tony Tony Chopper is a closet pervert! Who knew?"
"OOH! Mr. Amaxing! That reminds me!" yelled Amarillo, his yellow eyes gleaming in excitement. "I think it would be cool if you made a Naruto-parallel fan fiction with me as the main character Mr. Amaxing!"
"You think this….why?"
"Because I have this really cool idea! You see, it takes place after Akatsuki dies and everything… I'm a ninja who can't use chakra, but understands it amazingly! So then the four-tailed wolf comes along and…"
"I don't like it…oh shoot. SKYLER!"
"Yes?"
"Quick, I need a disclaimer for Naruto!"
"Got it! Um…"
Disclaimer: Got Naruto? Amaxing doesn't.
"How's that?"
"As good as usual man, as good as usual." Amaxing nodded towards Skyler.
"Well, if we're talking about putting ourselves in fan fictions, I think that I would make an awesome villain" said Dante'.
Murmurs of agreement filled the room. "He does have the perfect name for it," said Nami "it even rhymes! Too cool."
"Alright, Alright" said Amaxing "I'll put it down." He wrote 'Dante' Cervantes as villain' on the chalkboard. "Anything else?"
Zoro raised his hand. The room fell silent.
Amaxing was shocked. "Zoro? YOU want to suggest something?"
Zoro nodded. "I'd just like to say that so far, except for the whole moonwalk thing, you haven't made me do anything embarrassing. I'd like to suggest you keep it that way." The tone of his voice told Amaxing it wasn't a suggestion; it was a threat.
Amaxing sighed. "Well, there goes my idea of you having a mid-life crisis and wanting to become a clown…"
Zoro eyed Amaxing. "I'll ignore that. Anyway, I have to go, promised I'd meet Robin at the 'Big Rock Café' or something."
Skyler perked up. "The Hard Rock?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Well…" began Skyler, standing up and staring out the window to increase the effect of his characterization slot, "it's just that…it's always been my dream to have my guitar enshrined there!"
Silence. "Ooook." Said Zoro. "I'm going to….go…now."
Skyler sat back down, embarrassed.
Suddenly, the secretary Lucille's voice came over the intercom. "Mr. Amaxing sir, I have an idea!"
Amaxing sighed. "What is it, Lucille?"
"I think you should make a LinkxSamus fic, that's all." The intercom died. Amaxing looked at Skyler.
Disclaimer: Super Smash Brothers was not brought to you in part by Amaxing, or by the contributions of viewers like you. Thank you!
"Nice work man."
"No problem Mr. Amaxing."
"Hey, why not make him a main character in a fic?" asked Nami.
"She had a good point Mr. Amaxing" said Damon "if anyone deserves credit around here, its Sky, right guys?"
The Amaxing staff murmured in agreement.
Amaxing shook his head. "No, we've already been through this. No one, and I repeat, NO ONE gets to be a main character!"
"Why not?" asked Sanji.
"Well, think about it, if they were in these stories, who would help me write the stories?"
"Come off it Amaxing, you don't need any help, do you?" Dante asked. "Besides, all we really are is a personification of the many different aspects that go into writing a fan fiction anyway."
"You know, I could fire you for that."
"NO PLEASE!" begged Dante' "I need this job! My wife is expecting a kid!"
"Alright fine, just don't squeal like that ever again."
"Yes sir, thank you sir."
The clock struck 5.
"Hey look!" said Nathan "Work's over!"
"Thank goodness" said Damon "let's get out of this place."
"You know I am still here," said Amaxing.
Sanji walked up to Amaxing. "If you change your mind about that Hot-Hot fruit thing, let me know, eh?"
SMACK! Sanji fell to the floor again. Chopper sighed, picked up the chef and hauled him out of the room.
"You will think about giving him his own story, won't you?" asked Nami.
"Who, Sanji?"
"No, that disclaimer boy."
"Well… I might be able to…but it'll cost you!"
"THAT'S MY LINE!!!"
"Right, yes, of course, sorry."
Amaxing began to pack his things. Then, he heard a loud cry from the hallway. "YOSH! FREE COTTON CANDY!"
Luffy burst into the room. "Cotton Candy?" He asked hopefully. Amaxing shook his head.
"Gone." He replied.
"TARTAR SAUCE!" yelled Luffy.
"SKYLER!" yelled Amaxing.
Disclaimer: Hello… you have reached the disclaimer office…. please say the appropriate item you don't own after the beep…. BEEP…"Spongebob Squarepants."…. is not the property of Amaxing or Amaxing Fan Fiction Inc. Thank you.
Techno-ish end of story music plays.
Fin.
