Notes: AU where Roxas goes with Axel in the beginning of KHII and then they kidnap Kairi, because that is an area in which she excels. (Love you, Kairi.)
"So if you're a Princess of Heart, does that make your particular cardiovascular organ especially potent?"
"Uh," Kairi banged her handcuffs against the faucet, knocking one of the taps straight off in her efforts. Roxas threw his hands into the air.
"I just fixed that!"
"The reason I ask is, 'cause, we're nobodies. Me and him. So we don't have hearts."
"Uh-huh," Kairi said, and shuffled over to the door. Axel, appearing unconcerned, followed her into the kitchen, where she located a bread knife and began using it as a saw.
"Oh, no way. I am not sharpening that shit," Roxas noted. Axel ignored him.
"So I was thinking, you know, if your heart is so rare, it must be capable of generating enough revenue to cover the debts of those who just couldn't catch a break, you know?"
Kairi paused in her escape plan to squint at him, "Are you saying you're holding me for ransom?"
"No," Axel said, with a benevolent sneer.
"Would you stop that," Roxas interrupted, pointing to her knife, "It's an exercise in futility."
Kairi glowered, "Did I mention that my childhood friends are going to kick your butts when they come to save me?"
"Kick our butts? Yes. Yes, that particular phrase does ring a bell. Kairi, you are a poet. I have always considered Roxas to be something more of a 'tush,' though."
"No," Roxas intoned, voice bleak.