A/N: Sad and angsty.
Enjoy. :)
"Man always dies before he is fully born."
Erich Fromm
It all happened without warning.
The sun suddenly expanded at a phenomenal rate.
Nobody survived.
Han and Leia grieved for eternity, seeking each other's warmth, trying to make it over the impossible hurdle that was their childrens', and Luke's, death.
But now they were released from break. They were needed for a diplomatic mission, and Leia was needed. Han threatened to defect to the other side if he was not allowed with her.
Both of them dwelled on the deaths, but still worked hard. It was the end of the mission when chaos suddenly struck.
Leia watched numbly as she was blasted off her feet, landing on her back. Loud ringing filled her ears and she tried to stand up, only to feel a piercing pain in her chest. What happened?
Smoke obscured her vision, making her hack violently. Her fingers found rubble around her and she struggled to her feet. Leia's hearing began to clear, and she could hear Han's voice calling for her.
"I'm here," she said as loud as she could, her voice breaking. Dizziness made her disoriented, but she could make out the figure of a man walking through the smoke.
"Han," she said weakly, raising her hand up for help.
The shadow only raised its blaster, pointing it straight at her chest. He pulled the trigger.
I watch the laserbolt pierce through my chest, sending an unbearable shot of agony racing through my body.
I utter a scream, both in pain, also to warn Han. If he comes on time, he could take the enemy out before being killed.
It is evident to me that I will not make it this time.
I drop to my knees as my assassin slumps to the ground himself. A moment later, Han emerges from the haze and is immediately at my side. He catches me as I fall and cradles my head in his knees.
"Stay with me Leia," he rumbles in terror. My hand reaches up, feeling the gaping hole in my chest. I pull it to my rapidly fading eyesight to see scarlet blood.
"I can't," I say quietly. Tears roll down his cheeks, falling onto my face. I find my own tear escaping my left eye, making slow progress down the side of my face.
"Please, Leia," he says, his voice rising in panic. Jaded lights of white begin to lap at the edges of my vision. My heart is failing, and my breath is coming in short breaths.
"Han," I breathe. My words come slowly, thickly, to my heavy, unresponsive tongue. My free hand finds his face, stroking it, my eyes taking each little detail of his features until they are imprinted in my memory. "I," I choke. "I love you."
I let the warm waves wash over me and I catch one last sight of beauty to take with me. Those dark, hazel eyes.
I let go of my human body, drifting with the Force.
Luke's presence awakens me from the peaceful slumber. His voice speaks to me through the Force.
"Leia."
"Luke." I find I have missed him dearly. "Luke, what has happened?"
"You have died."
"Died?"
I remember it all, I want to cover my face and weep. I don't know why, in joy or sadness or relief. But I am nothingness. All that I can sense are those same white waters that had carried me away.
"Am I...one with the Force?" I ask tentatively. He pauses for a moment.
"No. Not yet. There is one last thing that you must do before your soul is at peace," he says.
I cannot imagine what it is until I find that I am suddenly standing in a funeral.
My funeral.
What?
Hundreds upon hundreds of people gather in the green meadow. I recognize my mother, my true mother Padme Naberrie's homeworld of Naboo. I walk forwards, naming each of these attendants in the front row. The generals, Mon Mothma. Friends. Han.
Han.
His face is empty of feeling, blank with shock. He stares straight ahead. My cheeks flush in emotion, tears brimming to my eyes. I force myself to turn away.
My body lies on the pyre, and I walk over it like a human in a dream. Sure enough, there are those features I have seen in the mirror. Layers of makeup make my skin glow, my cheeks full, my lips a natural shade of pink. My hair is loose, in long strands that frame my face. It looks like I have lay down in a mattress of green grass and flowers and fallen asleep.
I stand quietly before myself, my corpse, as they say their blessings and conduct the ceremony. Finally, a flaming golden torch is lit to the pyre and I watch as my life as I knew it is reduced to ashes.
People file out in silence, murmuring quietly and eventually Han is left sitting, grieving, his head in his hands.
Ben steps forwards from the dissolving group. Both of his parents, gone, yet he is still the strong Jedi he has always been.
"Uncle Han?" he says quietly. He is thirteen, still a boy. "Don't cry." Han's shoulders shake in silence, and I let loose to my own tears.
"She's gone."
"She's is undoubtedly one with the Force," his nephew said in a calm, low voice. "She has found peace."
"Peace." He finally looks up, his eyes clouded with tears. A small smile touches his lips. "Yes. Thank you, Ben."
The young apprentice watches his uncle carefully, sensing something going on.
"You're welcome," he says cautiously, and I feel a prick of foreboding myself. He stands for a moment, uncertain, before walking off in silence.
Han stands alone in the maze of chairs, staring at the pyre, the jar of ashes, of my ashes. I step forwards, and I suddenly know that I must be visible to Han.
"Leia?" his voice is shocked. I only smile, reaching out a shimmery, opalescent hand to stroke his cheek.
"Oh, Han."
"Let me join you," he blurts suddenly, his hazel eyes wide and desperate. His right hand fumbles at his side before removing the blaster from its holster. I realize his intentions and lunge for his hand, trying to knock it away. He wastes his energy pulling it away, as my hand passes right through his arm.
"No, Han," I say loudly. "You can't do this! Han! Please!" I shout at him, covering my face, shaking my head. He only leans down and brushes my non-existent forehead with a last kiss. The cold muzzle meets his temple and his eyes meet mine. I scream in desperation as he pulls the trigger.
I catch one last emotion in those eyes that I love so much, the ones I had thought I would never see again. I saw some strange, dancing joy, passion, sadness, excitement, relief. So many things.
They all disappear as he falls back onto the grass.
Lifeless.
I stand in shocked silence, staring down at Han's body.
"Leia."
His voice jerks me around. I dash into those familiar warm arms, except now they are like mine, half-transparent and shimmering. But this time I can hold them in my own.
"Why, why did you do it," I whisper into his chest, tears spilling again.
"Because I love you."
We leave reality as the people start swarming, screaming, snapping pictures of the remains. We keep going, ignore all of the sorrows in our lives past.
Nothing can touch us now.
A/N: Thanks for reading.
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