Title: A wedding, a not so good introduction and a refreshing drink
Rating: R
Disclaimer: The characters from Lock, Stock belong to Guy Ritchie. I am using the lads for fun and not meaning any harm. All non-movie characters are mine and I am not making any money off this story.
Summary: Soap's getting married and Bacon's still having trouble getting the drink he wants. Throw in a lady to complicate things and see what you get.
Archive: Just ask
Feedback: Please
Note: I beta read this with help from a friend. So I hope I fixed all the mistakes. If not so sorry
Chapter 1
Hatred at First Sight
~ A STRIP CLUB SOMEWHERE IN LONDON~
Jesus this place sucks! Looks like those three shit heads are having a good time. Ed got a red head...damn she does really like him. Bacon turned his head in the opposite direction of his friends. They were, all in their own ways having fun. He on the other hand was sick and tired of watching this large breasted woman bounce her tits in his face. He couldn't believe that the night before Soap's wedding he wanted to go to a strip club. Of all the places, Soap never set foot in a strip club before in his life. All of a sudden thoughts of G-strings and topless woman appealed to him. Bacon shook his head in disbelief. Soap, I can't believe you wanted to come to a strip club!
The sound of the red headed moaning caused Bacon's head to snapped back in that direction. Ed had a shit eating grin on his face. He looked like he'd just won the mother of all porker games. Thank God they were seated at the back of the club in a darkened corner or for sure he and his friends would be thrown out of the club. Tom and Soap where seated on the other side of the huge table with a girl on both their laps. He laughed to himself, Soap was actually being a ladies man. A blonde sat staring down at him. She was hanging on his every word. I thought I'd never see that! Tom on the other hand was wrapped around a raven haired beauty who was calling him Tommy.
Why don't you just leave? He was asking himself that. The answer was clear, he couldn't leave his mates. They had been friends for so long and had gone through allot together. Blowing this little party off would be a bad decision on his part. The three men sitting at the table would go through hell with him and never let him down when he needed them!
With that thought, Bacon spent the next two hours pretending to have a good time. Thank goodness not one of them was a mind reader!!
As the night went on, Bacon found himself deeper into a state of boredom. Soap and Ed were shit faced to say the least and Tom. Tom was from another planet. Sometimes only sometimes did he, Soap and Ed visit that special place that Tom called home. His friend was at the bar with the same raven haired girl gracing his lap. He was now making a deal with the owner, something about bottles of acholol and how Tom could get the man more product for less. Bacon laughed, knowing Tom would be making more money in the end. Finally when the club was closing, the four of them left.
~SOAP'S FIANCÉ'S FRONTDOOR~
"I WANT TO SEE HOLLY!" Soap yelled while banging on the door.
Tom grabbed hold of him and pulled him away from the door. "You ass you're gonna wake the whole block!"
"I DON'T CARE THOMAS! I WANT TO SEE HOLLY AND TELL HER I LOVE HER!"
Tom rolled his eyes before saying, "Soap shut up and after we get back to your flat then you can call her on the cell."
Bacon was too busy holding Ed up to help with Soap. He keep his head turned, due to the fact that his friend smelt of Liquor and sex.
"Fuck Ed, you are a heavy one."
He saw that Tom was having a difficult time holding onto Soap. He placed Ed against the semi fence and went to help Tom. His arms were almost around Soap's body when a voice came from behind.
"Don't you think you should get him home?"
Bacon turned his head and saw a woman glaring at them. "Well, what's this about?" he then asked after turning around to face her.
"Don't you think you should take him home!" She insisted while folded her arms over her chest.
Without thinking, Bacon looked the woman up and down. She looked like a tart. A black skirt was high above her knees, showing off more legs than he cared to look at. Her top, if you could call it a top was also black and skin tight. The front was cut low to show off her breast which were now practically falling out cause of her arms resting beneath them. If that wasn't enough, she had on black high heels. The straps encircled her ankle. All in all she looked like a hooker, a damn fine hooker but a hooker nonetheless.
"Sweetheart," he said while taking a step closer to her, "why don't you let us get back to business so you can get back to the corner over there!"
Bacon smiled to himself, great line. The woman in front of him wasn't as amused as he was. She placed her hands on her hips then said, "You bald..."
She was silenced by the front door opening. Bacon wished she would have finished what she wanted to say.
"Tom, Soap, Ed, Bacon? What are you doing here?" Holly asked.
"He wanted to see you" Tom told her while pulling a now sleeping Soap closer to him.
Holly smiled at Soap then said, "You've got a get, my mum comes down and she call the police on you."
Bacon turned around to face the woman again, but she was gone. Where did the tart go? He shook his head then looked back at Holly then smiled. "How are you love?" he then asked.
"Fine Bacon, now you four go!" She shook her head then slammed the door in their faces.
~~~~~~
~THE NEXT MORNING~
Soap woke up with the worst hang over in his life. He stood for an hour under the hot water in his shower.
After he was done, he strolled into his living room and found Bacon asleep on the couch. He slapped his head as the walked by.
"Ah hell Soap!" Bacon hissed after he sat up. "I was having a very nice dream until you ruined it!"
"Sorry" Soap said while making some tea.
Bacon fell back down on the couch. He pulled the covers over his head and tired his hardest to go back to sleep. His dream was getting good before Soap arrived.
~BACON'S DREAM~
He was sitting a chair in a dark room. A door opened and someone walked in.
"You've been a naughty boy" came out of the darkness.
All the sudden a woman appeared in front of him. He focused more clearly on her but couldn't make out her face. She wore the same outfit that hooker had been wearing.
Bacon knew he was liking this dream. Without warning, she sat down on his lap.
"Have you been a naughty boy?" she asked again. Before slowly unbuttoning his shirt.
"God I hope so!" escaped his lips before she was about to kiss him.
Then he felt a slap to his head...Ah fuck!
~BACK IN THE REAL WORLD~
"Bacon where's Tom and Ed?"
Bacon growled then threw the covers off of him. He sat up and flung his legs off the couch. "They went back to Tom's. They'll be here around 11:00."
Soap sat down across from Bacon and held his head, "I feel like someone shot me and God is punishing me by not letting me die."
"You are a real sick bastard sometimes"
"Well," Soap then announced, "it's 11:05 you need to take your shower or we'll be late."
Bacon watched as Soap finished his tea and went back to his bedroom. He isn't telling us something. I don't know what he did before we meet him but I really don't want to know anything about it!
TBC
Rating: R
Disclaimer: The characters from Lock, Stock belong to Guy Ritchie. I am using the lads for fun and not meaning any harm. All non-movie characters are mine and I am not making any money off this story.
Summary: Soap's getting married and Bacon's still having trouble getting the drink he wants. Throw in a lady to complicate things and see what you get.
Archive: Just ask
Feedback: Please
Note: I beta read this with help from a friend. So I hope I fixed all the mistakes. If not so sorry
Chapter 1
Hatred at First Sight
~ A STRIP CLUB SOMEWHERE IN LONDON~
Jesus this place sucks! Looks like those three shit heads are having a good time. Ed got a red head...damn she does really like him. Bacon turned his head in the opposite direction of his friends. They were, all in their own ways having fun. He on the other hand was sick and tired of watching this large breasted woman bounce her tits in his face. He couldn't believe that the night before Soap's wedding he wanted to go to a strip club. Of all the places, Soap never set foot in a strip club before in his life. All of a sudden thoughts of G-strings and topless woman appealed to him. Bacon shook his head in disbelief. Soap, I can't believe you wanted to come to a strip club!
The sound of the red headed moaning caused Bacon's head to snapped back in that direction. Ed had a shit eating grin on his face. He looked like he'd just won the mother of all porker games. Thank God they were seated at the back of the club in a darkened corner or for sure he and his friends would be thrown out of the club. Tom and Soap where seated on the other side of the huge table with a girl on both their laps. He laughed to himself, Soap was actually being a ladies man. A blonde sat staring down at him. She was hanging on his every word. I thought I'd never see that! Tom on the other hand was wrapped around a raven haired beauty who was calling him Tommy.
Why don't you just leave? He was asking himself that. The answer was clear, he couldn't leave his mates. They had been friends for so long and had gone through allot together. Blowing this little party off would be a bad decision on his part. The three men sitting at the table would go through hell with him and never let him down when he needed them!
With that thought, Bacon spent the next two hours pretending to have a good time. Thank goodness not one of them was a mind reader!!
As the night went on, Bacon found himself deeper into a state of boredom. Soap and Ed were shit faced to say the least and Tom. Tom was from another planet. Sometimes only sometimes did he, Soap and Ed visit that special place that Tom called home. His friend was at the bar with the same raven haired girl gracing his lap. He was now making a deal with the owner, something about bottles of acholol and how Tom could get the man more product for less. Bacon laughed, knowing Tom would be making more money in the end. Finally when the club was closing, the four of them left.
~SOAP'S FIANCÉ'S FRONTDOOR~
"I WANT TO SEE HOLLY!" Soap yelled while banging on the door.
Tom grabbed hold of him and pulled him away from the door. "You ass you're gonna wake the whole block!"
"I DON'T CARE THOMAS! I WANT TO SEE HOLLY AND TELL HER I LOVE HER!"
Tom rolled his eyes before saying, "Soap shut up and after we get back to your flat then you can call her on the cell."
Bacon was too busy holding Ed up to help with Soap. He keep his head turned, due to the fact that his friend smelt of Liquor and sex.
"Fuck Ed, you are a heavy one."
He saw that Tom was having a difficult time holding onto Soap. He placed Ed against the semi fence and went to help Tom. His arms were almost around Soap's body when a voice came from behind.
"Don't you think you should get him home?"
Bacon turned his head and saw a woman glaring at them. "Well, what's this about?" he then asked after turning around to face her.
"Don't you think you should take him home!" She insisted while folded her arms over her chest.
Without thinking, Bacon looked the woman up and down. She looked like a tart. A black skirt was high above her knees, showing off more legs than he cared to look at. Her top, if you could call it a top was also black and skin tight. The front was cut low to show off her breast which were now practically falling out cause of her arms resting beneath them. If that wasn't enough, she had on black high heels. The straps encircled her ankle. All in all she looked like a hooker, a damn fine hooker but a hooker nonetheless.
"Sweetheart," he said while taking a step closer to her, "why don't you let us get back to business so you can get back to the corner over there!"
Bacon smiled to himself, great line. The woman in front of him wasn't as amused as he was. She placed her hands on her hips then said, "You bald..."
She was silenced by the front door opening. Bacon wished she would have finished what she wanted to say.
"Tom, Soap, Ed, Bacon? What are you doing here?" Holly asked.
"He wanted to see you" Tom told her while pulling a now sleeping Soap closer to him.
Holly smiled at Soap then said, "You've got a get, my mum comes down and she call the police on you."
Bacon turned around to face the woman again, but she was gone. Where did the tart go? He shook his head then looked back at Holly then smiled. "How are you love?" he then asked.
"Fine Bacon, now you four go!" She shook her head then slammed the door in their faces.
~~~~~~
~THE NEXT MORNING~
Soap woke up with the worst hang over in his life. He stood for an hour under the hot water in his shower.
After he was done, he strolled into his living room and found Bacon asleep on the couch. He slapped his head as the walked by.
"Ah hell Soap!" Bacon hissed after he sat up. "I was having a very nice dream until you ruined it!"
"Sorry" Soap said while making some tea.
Bacon fell back down on the couch. He pulled the covers over his head and tired his hardest to go back to sleep. His dream was getting good before Soap arrived.
~BACON'S DREAM~
He was sitting a chair in a dark room. A door opened and someone walked in.
"You've been a naughty boy" came out of the darkness.
All the sudden a woman appeared in front of him. He focused more clearly on her but couldn't make out her face. She wore the same outfit that hooker had been wearing.
Bacon knew he was liking this dream. Without warning, she sat down on his lap.
"Have you been a naughty boy?" she asked again. Before slowly unbuttoning his shirt.
"God I hope so!" escaped his lips before she was about to kiss him.
Then he felt a slap to his head...Ah fuck!
~BACK IN THE REAL WORLD~
"Bacon where's Tom and Ed?"
Bacon growled then threw the covers off of him. He sat up and flung his legs off the couch. "They went back to Tom's. They'll be here around 11:00."
Soap sat down across from Bacon and held his head, "I feel like someone shot me and God is punishing me by not letting me die."
"You are a real sick bastard sometimes"
"Well," Soap then announced, "it's 11:05 you need to take your shower or we'll be late."
Bacon watched as Soap finished his tea and went back to his bedroom. He isn't telling us something. I don't know what he did before we meet him but I really don't want to know anything about it!
TBC