An impromptu one-shot inspired by this wonderfully adorable doujin I had come across. Link is in my profile, be sure to check it out and rate the artist! :)

Warning : A very OOC Levi, un-beta-ed writing, spoilers up to the very latest manga chapter (ch.51)


THE BATH


Levi couldn't tell why he was feeling like this. His legs wobbled, so much he could barely walk. His head spun, so much that his vision blurred. All he wanted to do was lay down somewhere; somewhere where his head could rest… it was getting hard to burden his head on his shoulders. He knew he was walking, and how he was doing that without any support was beyond him. His arms flailed all around, blindly grasping for something to hold onto. And to his surprise, he got naught. All there was around him was the ground… muddy, filthy, and insect-infested ground. For a split second, his usual conscience lapsed and he contemplated on lying down there. The very next second, his whole being and soul itched at the thought.

Levi, in his pain, marveled at what those brats had reduced him to. He had been driven delusional enough to consider laying his entire being on the ground – the ground! May he be be-headed before he does that. Controlling the previous 104th squad wasn't as easy as he thought to be. Look scary enough and they'll be reduced to a bunch of puppies, he thought. Look very unapproachable and they won't question you, he thought. Since they were now under his control, he could get a year's cleaning done out of them, he planned.

By the time he reached their first designated cleaning spot, which happened to be one of the Recon. Corps's offices, Levi blanched at the sight when he first entered.

His headache multiplied tenfold as the bizarre image replayed in his mind. All he could recall was that it messier and dirtier than before and the brats were obviously to blame for it.

But as he tried to get them to work again, Levi discovered that when it comes to normal work – other than saving their asses from Titans – these brats had the attention span of a monkey. No actually, worse than a monkey. The barely listened to him, even when he was threatening to slice their throats; they went on their merry ways, eating, chatting… being mindless monkey they were.

In the end, he had to kick them out and do all the cleaning himself… and that took a massive toll on him. He could've spent an entire day slaying Titans and he wouldn't have been this tired. Though it wasn't the cleaning that took a toll on him, it was those bickering annoying as hell brats in earshot that got him so spent. His brain wasn't that strong.

Controlling the fools at the military tribunal had been hell of a lot easier than this!

He desperately needed a place to lie down.

Through the blurriness of his vision, he finally registers something hopeful in eyes. A door – it must be a door of the barracks. Or a shed. Or anything that something clean he can lie down on.

He walks as quickly as his legs allow him to, desperation apparent in his face to anyone who looks upon him. He feels like a man who has found an oasis after days in the desert. He might as well look one too.

He finally reaches the door and latches himself to it. His ears are pressed to the wood and his breathing had become ragged. His hand grabs the door knob and twists it with all his might. It easily gives away, as Levi stumbles carelessly into it. He forgets to greet anyone who might or might not be in the room.

His vision might be blurred, but his other senses are not. As he limply walks into the room, he sniffs the air, inhaling in deeply. The room feels cold and not at all pleasant smelling. And void of any being. Oh, there's the bed. Hallelujah.

Though he never takes a note of what anything smells like, the smell of this room feels eerily familiar. He weakly thinks as he starts to take steps towards the bed, his energy being drained heavily with each step.

"Levi? Is that you?"

The last ounce of Levi's energy dissipated as soon as Hanji's voice drifted into his ears. With only steps away from the bed, he lost all will and fell hard onto the floor, his head barely inches away from – if his memory served right – from Hanji's bookshelf. Of all the places in the world, he had stumbled into her room. Her unkempt room…

"Levi! What in the world are you doing down there?"

Levi's head-ache had increased even more from the blow he received while he did a free-fall to the floor. And he didn't even try to think about what Hanji's floor might be infested with. Knowing the shitty four eyed woman, she didn't even allow anyone to clean or more so touch anything in her room. He knows, because god knows how times he tried to do that.

"Well, isn't it nice of you to visit an old friend! I have so many things I'd like to clear with you… So good of you to drop by!"

Levi groaned loudly. For a moment, he tried to forget everything and focus on the fact that he laying somewhere and it felt oddly incredible, despite the throbbing in the back of his head. And things to clear? He mentally scoffed. As if she cared for that. Shitty eyes must have gone out and done something she shouldn't have and this was her way of confessing what fucked up deed she did. "…knowing you, you already might've gone and done it… whether I would approve of it or not." He let his eyes flutter close, spreading his arms wide on the floor. He would just have to get a bath later on. Germs and dirt be damned.

He heard Hanji giggle. Bingo. She doesn't giggle. She guffaws, roars with laughter. Not giggle. She must have done something. Levi hissed, not bothering to look at the woman. "Oi, four eyes. What'd ya do?"

She giggled again, this time a bit more awkwardly. "Oh you're so cute Levi. I never said I did anything! I just wanted to you… oh my! Would you look at the time!"

The wooden floor creaked loudly as Hanji's thudded through the room. Judging from the increasing loudness, she was headed towards him. Good, he can berate her easily from where he was lying.

"Hanji, what the hell –" Levi caught the gentle whiff of soap waft into his nostrils, while the mild warm of steam tickled his face. All these were signs that someone had showered… "Did you shower?"

Levi opened his eyes to make sure what he was thinking to be true. His eyes were momentarily blinded by the overhead bulb hanging from the ceiling… until something blocked it. He squinted hard, trying to decipher what the hell was hanging over him all of a sudden.

Hanji's voice suddenly boomed out, as she loudly guffawed. "I smell nice, don't I?"

Levi's brain very slowly registered the fact that Hanji had just showered. She might have just gotten out of it when he stumbled in. And he remembered the fact that Hanji had zero regard for if she was decent or not.

A naked Hanji was standing on top of his head.

"Say, you were with the kids today right? How're they doing, gosh it's been such a long time since I saw them! You know, I had some books set aside for Armin. He's gonna love them…"

Levi's breathing had become labored; his eyes itched, since apparently he had forgotten how to blink. His jaws hurt from clasping his mouth so hard and breathing hard through his nostrils. He wanted to warn her, yell at her to move the hell away from him, since he was not enjoying the scene the right in front of his eyes!

"You know what, I'm going to take them with me now!" The 'cloud' overhead cleared and he was met with the blinding glare from the bulb.

Loud thuds reached his ears as Hanji stepped away. Wait, what was she saying before…?

"Oi, shitty eyes!" Levi sat up as fast as he could, resulting him in getting whiplash. He ignored the searing pain, focusing only on Hanji's moving figure, heading towards the open door, clad only in a towel.

Hanji halted sharply at the door, turning sharply towards Levi, "Oh Levi! I'll be right back! I'll just give these to Armin and be back in a jiffy!"

As he stared hard at her, Levi noted that Hanji was glowing. She was fucking glowing. Okay, maybe it was the sun streaming in from outside, and also the fact that was finally clean… but she was glowing. What in the world has happened? He violently shook his head, clearing his head and coming to the matter at hand.

"Hanji, for heaven's sake, get dressed first. It's in the after-noon, everyone is working, they will see you and –"

"Ah, Levi! I'll just give these books and be back! Nothing will happen, I swear!"

What followed after was just dust flowing in the air, its particles clearly visible in the sunlight, wafting gently through the air, and Hanji making a mad dash. In a towel.

Levi sighed helplessly, concluding for sure that Hanji Zoe had zero regard for decency. How she manages to lead an entire squad, more so garner respect for them is beyond him. He couldn't do it. Today would be a shining example.


Thank you for reading this! I agree, it was not very 'shippy' but hey, Levi-Hanji friendship is as awesome as the ship! :D
Please note that I was not aiming for a very in-depth, well written story, so the layout and story may have not been up to par and the characters not much in character. I tried! :P

If you wish, please leave a feedback! We writers love to hear what you thought of them! 0:)