Title: The One with All the Answers
Pairing: None
Warnings/Spoilers: None
A/N: Thank you to mrspollifax for her beta work


"What was it like working for General O'Neill?"

Walter gets a lot of questions about that year. Though he's certain what they're really asking is how he could've possibly survived it?

The answer is a lot of coffee. That, and not taking things too seriously even when they are serious. Especially when they are serious. Although O'Neill was in charge of the SGC for a short period of time, Walter learned a great deal from working so closely with the general, including some pretty good knock-knock jokes.

"Hey Walter, could you tell us the story about the time…?"

If there was anyone that appeared to be polar-opposite of General O'Neill, it was General Hammond. Walter often fielded questions after the general retired, since many at the SGC knew that Walter and his former boss still kept in touch. Every single inquiry seemed to come from genuine respect for the general and a desire to be reassured that he was doing well.

Since the funeral there's been little that people say. Walter's sure once a period of mourning is over, they will once again request Walter recount happy times. Right now, it's too soon.

"Teal'c does realize that 'kill two birds with one stone' is not a direct order to go outside and begin stoning birds to death, right?"

Walter gets more inquires about Teal'c than anyone else. He must admit it took a number of years before he was sure how to answer some of them but Walter can now confidently respond to any question that might arise. Er, hopefully.

Walter makes a mental note to keep an eye out for dead birds on base, and if he finds any, he'll do away with them before anyone else notices.

"Do you ever get annoyed when Colonel Carter uproots you from your chair and takes over?"

He doesn't remember what his response was at the time; probably something that sought out a tiny bit of sympathy, yet sounded respectful. She did save the world, after all, several times over. It's hard to get mad at that.

And if ever the line of inquiry starts to steer away from Samantha Carter's work-related accomplishments and toward her physical attributes, he has nothing to say about it, changes the subject quickly, and harbors a little less respect for the person asking.

"Were you there when it happened?"

Considering SG-1's history "it" could mean a lot of things. But when it comes to Daniel Jackson, Walter assumes the person asking wants to know details of Daniel's ascension. Or descension? Both times?

He wasn't in the room when Daniel ascended so he can't comment on that. As for the second time Daniel descended there's not much to say, other then it happened quickly and everyone was surprised except O'Neill. Oh, and it was Walter's responsibility to get the flag dry-cleaned.

"Say that again?"

By the time General Landry came to the SGC the program had been around so long that people on base had begun referring to "the old days" with some level of nostalgia. Walter finds that he doesn't get nearly as many questions about General Landry, as he does from General Landry. There continues to be an unspoken agreement never to mention the fact that Landry has never read all the past mission reports. So if something comes up in a meeting or hallway discussion that Landry doesn't know the history of, he later pulls Walter aside to fill him in.

Walter doesn't mind the questions; it keeps his day busy. Well, those days that don't require activating the self-destruct, anyway.

"What's with the new guy?"

As opposed to Landry, it seems Colonel Mitchell did, in fact, read every file he could get his hands on. Thus, Walter got a lot of suspicious questions those first few months about how the new guy knew so much? Walter mostly shrugged his shoulders because he understood the procedure, and the questions would disappear as soon as Mitchell started demonstrating a consistent record of bringing his team back alive.

Well, except for Daniel. Daniel going missing once in a while wouldn't impact on anyone's opinion of Mitchell.

Exactly as Walter predicted, about three months in, he stopped getting any questions about the new guy. Unfortunately, those might be preferable to the ladies in accounting always asking Walter if he knows whether or not Mitchell was single.

"Is she serious?"

When it comes to Vala, the answer is "Yes" almost every time. Expect for the things he cannot confirm or deny, like her claim that aliens from her home planet have no gag reflex. He simply couldn't say whether or not it's true. He has no idea. Never given it even a moment's consideration. Honestly.

"What is the best part of your job?"

When one of the members of leadership council visiting from P6X-090 turns and asks Walter this question he doesn't hesitate. He doesn't need to think about it for even a second before he answers.

"The people."