Gel's First Kiss
"I have never felt so humiliated, so stupid or so not cool in my entire life! The worst thing is, I think I've lost one of my truest friends over this. Mouse says he'll come round, so does Trudy (they're the only other ones who know, thankfully), but I don't know if I can ever look at him again without cringing and blushing and getting tongue-tied and ... Oh heck! What have I done? Surely your first kiss isn't meant to be like this, well, to turn out like this anyway? It's meant to be nice and romantic. First kisses are supposed to be sweet little things that you remember forever and can look back at when you're sixty and smile at them. I don't think I'll ever smile again! Certainly not over this!
It's not like it was love at first sight or anything, don't get me wrong, it takes time to get used to this guy, to get to know him; but once I did, I was hooked. He's a great guy. It's funny, when we first met I thought so little of him, now I think so little of anything else: I just can't get him out of my head, even now. I've got it bad, and I've been like this now for a month at least. No, come to think of it, it all started about six weeks ago, when another ex-Mall Rat turned up."
Trudy was busy making full use of the now smoothly operating electricity to make waffles for Mouse, Sammy, Gel, Brady and Salene. Jack and Ellie were sitting at one table eating cereals and having a hushed argument, while Ebony was watching Amber from across the room. Lex, Ram, Jay and Slade sat at the same table as Amber, her son Bray and her sister Solaris, or Ruby as she was now called, discussing the goings on in the city. May was gone.
"And here we have the first plate of waffles!" Trudy laughed, putting on her cheery face as usual as she walked over to the counter with a plate of four waffles, as many as the waffle iron could cook at once, before passing the plate over the counter to Salene, "Sal, can you make sure there are no major battles over these: there'll be more in a few minutes."
As Salene returned to the table to see the four hungry faces staring at the plate in her hand, she really was reminded of a mother sparrow returning to feed her little ones in a nest: all hungry, all craning their necks to be the first to the food. She dished out one waffle each for the time being. Trudy would make another four and they could have one each of those, then she would make a third batch for herself and Salene while the others disappeared to avoid the washing up. All's fair in love and waffles!
Gel delicately picked small pieces off her waffle and popped them into her mouth, careful not to disturb her precisely applied lipstick.
"It'll get cold if you eat it that slow, Gel," said Mouse.
"Slow-ly," Salene automatically corrected, making a mental note to go over grammar with the kids in school tomorrow, today was their day off.
"I'm not that slow," Gel retorted, "and anyway, I'd rather be a slow eater than a messy one!"
"What's that supposed to mean," wailed Sammy, at whom the comment had been directed, causing the three young girls around him to erupt into a fit of giggling.
Trudy and Salene laughed too: it was true, Sammy was a terribly messy eater. She piled the next four waffles onto a plate as Salene rose to collect it from her. Turning to hand the plate of waffles to her friend, Trudy glanced up at a movement in the doorway that had caught her eye and froze. Salene saw her look, a confused one, not sure whether to be happy or worried, and turned, half hoping it might be Ryan or Alice.
"L-Luke," Salene stammered, her eyes wide and the plate in her hand beginning to dip to the floor, causing the waffles upon it to slide off and be caught, just in time, by Sammy.
The room went silent.
"W-what are you doing back here, Luke?" Trudy asked, glancing sideways to see Jack's knuckles turn white.
"I, um," Luke hesitated, looking at the frozen scene at the corner table: Jack was staring at his cereal, his brows gathered like storm clouds and his fists clenched on the table before him, while Ellie was watching Jack, one gentle hand placed over one of Jack's fists, the other resting by her bowl, "It doesn't matter, I'll go. This was a mistake."
Luke turned and left the room and the Mall Rats tried to focus their attention on anything but Jack and Ellie. Gel and Mouse, however, watched with bated breath. Jack's face never moved, his expression never changed as his eyes slid up to meet Ellie's. Gel had never seen looks alone say so much. Ellie's eyes looked deep into Jacks, pleading, begging, but for what? A sign? Forgiveness?
Release?
With an almost inaudible sigh, Jack pulled his hand away from his girlfriends and sat back.
"Go," he said, almost too quietly for the others to hear, even in the still silent room.
Ellie didn't need to be told twice: she practically ran out of the room and after Luke. Gel and Mouse looked down at their waffles, simultaneously, afraid to now be caught watching, then glanced at Salene and Trudy, who were watching each other with worried eyes, as if waiting for something. Looking quickly around the room, the two young girls found the other Mall Rats suddenly deeply interested in their food. Out of the corner of her eye, Gel saw Trudy's head turn slightly to watch Jack's countenance. Doing the same, she saw his face colour from a deathly white to a vibrant red, almost the colour of his hair.
"Duck!" Trudy whispered to Salene as the two of them expertly dodged the cereal bowl that went flying just over their lowered heads and Jack stormed out of the room.
"Of course, I'd never seen Jack lose his temper like that before, but I could understand why. I couldn't believe that little witch had done it to him again! He didn't deserve that! He didn't even deserve it first time round! So that was when it started, with a disaster. I should have guessed it could only lead to another one!
I'd had a little crush on him before, after all that hero business, but when Ellie decided to show everyone they were together, that quickly disappeared. I was a little ... downhearted ... for a while, but once I'd got past that, everything was fine. It was just a crush. It disappeared. This was different. When I had a crush on him, all I wanted was to be the hero's girlfriend. With this, all I want to do is make him feel better. I hate seeing him hurting like this. It's not fair. It's not Jack.
Ever since she arrived, he's been different. At the start, he was really happy! In a world of his own most of the time, but ... happy. I miss that. Once things settled down, he began to get back to being himself. Then the problems set in. Ellie's memory started throwing up things from a much more recent past. Things no-one had told her about. Things like the Chosen. Things like Luke.
I don't know how much she talked to Jack about it, but it was round about then that he started smiling less and snapping at people more. Then, he came back! Luke: the other man of Ellie's dreams! It was then that life in the mall really started to get ... interesting?"
"Jack, come down here!" Amber was shouting up to her old friend, who was sitting on the uppermost part of the mall roof.
"I'm fine where I am, Amber," Jack replied, tersely, "I just want to be left alone for a while."
"Okay then, then put the ladder down so that I can come up."
"When I said 'left alone', I meant by everyone including yourself!"
"Tough," Amber shouted, then searched her mind for something else to say.
"Look, I'm not gonna do anything stupid if that's what you're worried about! I just need to think."
"Then let me come up and 'think' with you."
"If you can get up here, you're welcome!" Jack shrugged, making sure the ladder was next to him and well out of Amber's reach.
"Fine, if that's what it takes!" Amber stormed back into the mall, past Gel and Mouse where they had been eavesdropping and emerged a few minutes later with a short A-frame stepladder.
"Aw, Amber, don't be stupid!" Jack cried, "You'll only end up hurting yourself!"
"I spent how long climbing trees in the Eco's? Nope, you are not putting me off just by stealing the ladder!"
"Amber!" Jack sighed, then gave up arguing.
Amber ignored him and set her stepladder up next to the wall. Climbing up to the top of the ladder only brought her reach up to an inch below the ledge. Standing on her tip toes, she could just grasp the ledge, but the old stepladder wobbled and threw her backwards. She would have kept going over the edge of the roof, but something, or someone, grabbed her and pulled her back. That someone was Jack.
"Come on," he sighed, "give me your other hand!"
Struggling past the low railing on the upper tier of the roof, Jack pulled Amber up to safety and sat her down beside him. She had a graze on her cheek and several bruises beginning to show from where she hit the wall on her return journey from the stepladder.
"There," Jack chided, "Are you happy now? You've bruises all over yourself!"
"Just don't say 'I told you so', okay," Amber replied, glad to have him thinking about something else, "Are they really that bad?"
"Ah, you'll live," Jack smiled, the first smile since breakfast that day, when Luke arrived, "You've seen better days though."
"And worse."
"True."
"But they'll get better again."
"Also true."
"Are you okay?"
"No," Jack replied, bitterly, staring at the ground, "But I will be."
Amber held her old friend close and felt his tears, wet on her shoulder. Below and out of sight, Gel and Mouse crept away.
"So, once again, he saves someone's life without even thinking about it. If he hadn't grabbed Amber then, she would have been a goner. It was after that that I really started looking at him differently. Looking out for people was second nature to Jack, regardless of the risk to himself, whether he knew them or not, or even whether he liked them. Just think of how he looked after me when we first met. And I was horrible to him! But now I saw him for what he really was: a really great guy! Brave, loyal, clever, honest ... well, if an inability to tell a lie and stick to it counts! Plus, he's cute, in a ... geeky ... kinda ... way.
Well, anyway, that was what got me hooked. And after that, everything was just tearing me up inside. Should I tell him? Should I wait a while, until he's over Ellie? How long should I wait? How should I tell him? What would he say? I watched him from a distance: chatting with Amber or going over some plans with Jay, or, on one occasion, even arguing with Lex and winning! I would go to talk to him sometimes. He's a good listener. Well, he tries to be. If there's a computer in front of him, nothing could take his attention from it fully. Most of the time he was busy working on something with Amber. I never quite figured out what, but it had something to do with the running of the city.
Even for a while after that, everyone was walking on eggshells around Jack. He'd never knowingly or deliberately hurt anyone, but some people were caught in the crossfire, especially whenever Ellie or Luke had been around. They tried to keep out of his way, but in a place this size, that's not always possible. Of course, the sensible idea would have been to move out instead of rub salt in Jack's wounds, but neither of them thought of that until Amber turned round and told them to get out, literally!"
Everyone heard the crash. Everyone went running. No-one knew quite what to expect Jack's moods had been so unpredictable over the past week that his oldest friends had to judge very carefully when to speak to him and when to leave him alone. The younger Mall Rats avoided him altogether. Only Brady would go near him and, even then, only with her mother. When everyone arrived at the source of the crash, the younger kids backed away. Amber, Lex and Trudy ran forward.
"Trudy, get the first aid kit!" Amber ordered as the rest of the Mall Rats disappeared back into the café; then she turned to their patient, "What happened, Jack?"
"I dunno," was the boy's dazed reply, "I just slipped. It's nothing."
"Mate, you 'just slipped' half-way down the stairs!" Lex retorted.
"Are you sure you're okay, Jack?" Trudy asked, returning with the first aid kit, "You look a little out of it."
"It's fine, I'm nothing, honest."
"Jack," Lex sighed, "are you drunk?"
"Maybe a little tipsy."
"Uh-huh," Lex held up his hand, "How many fingers do you see?"
"I dunno, stop wavin' 'em around!"
"Drunk as a skunk!" Amber sighed.
"But still sober enough to know who my friends are!" Jack slurred, "You guys are the best! You're always around, you know. Well, maybe not you, Amber, 'cause you were dead for a while. Nor you Trudy, 'cause you went off with those Chosen people, but you came back to your friends: that's the main thing. But you're all here now. All friends together. I love you guys."
"Right," Lex said, unable to stop himself laughing in any other way "let's get you to your room. You can spend the evening sleeping it off!"
"Plus most of tomorrow!" Amber giggled, helping Lex lift Jack to his feet.
Trudy lagged behind. She wasn't laughing.
When the three of them returned to the café, having left Jack safely tucked up in bed, they found the majority of the Mall Rats waiting for them.
"Is he okay?" Ellie was the first to ask the question on everyone's lips.
"Okay!" Amber exploded, "Okay! Ellie, I have never seen Jack like that before! I've never seen Jack half as bad-tempered as he has been recently and we all know whose fault it is! And you have the audacity to ask if he's okay! Why don't you just pack up and leave! Get out and stop hurting him even more!"
Needless to say, Ellie and Luke were gone before nightfall.
The next day, no-one saw anything of Jack. Eventually, at some point in the afternoon Gel went round to see if he was okay, but as she approached the door.
"It's your own fault!" Amber was saying.
"I know, I know," Jack replied, wearily, "Just don't lecture me, okay!"
"Oh, I think Lex is waiting to do that!" Amber laughed, "Now are you going to sit there all day, or what?"
Gel looked round the side of the door. Amber was standing, leaning against the wall. Jack was sitting on the side of his bed. He tried to stand up, but immediately sat back down again, clutching his head.
"Oh, go away!" Jack cried, "You've only come to torture me like this, haven't you! Admit it!"
"You know you'll feel better once you're up and about!" Amber replied, taking both of Jack's hands in hers and pulling him to his feet.
Jack staggered slightly, falling forward to be caught by Amber. His hands rested on her waist as he steadied himself.
"I swear, I'm never, ever drinking again!" Jack muttered.
"Uh-huh!" Amber replied, disbelieving.
"If only so that you can never do that to me again!"
"Admit it, you feel better now, though."
"A little," Jack rested his forehead on Amber's, "Can you just not move me for the next, um, hour or so?"
Amber laughed and Gel decided it was time to go, before anyone spotted her eavesdropping.
"I was glad he had someone to look after him, of course, even though it wasn't me.
Of course, I should have seen it. I should have guessed. After a couple of weeks, Jack seemed better ... happier ... but I just thought that was because Ellie had finally decided to leave with Luke and he was coming to terms with it. A few more weeks and he seemed his old self again. I thought, maybe, it was time to say something to him. About how I felt, I mean. So, I waited until he was on his own, then I went."
"Jack?" Gel called quietly round the door.
"Yeah, what is it?" Jack answered from in front of his computer.
"Can we talk?" Gel asked, shyly walking into the room.
"Sure," Jack glanced round at the younger girl, "You can come in, you know."
"Yeah, right," Gel gave a sheepish smile and walked over to sit down on the side of Jack's bed.
"Gel?" Jack questioned, getting up and walking over to her, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing!" the younger girl replied quickly, "I just, um, wanted to talk to you about something."
"Well ... what did you want to talk to me about? I-I mean, judging by the look on your face, it must be pretty important, right?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is."
"Then spit it out! Or are you afraid I'll laugh?"
"Slightly!"
"I won't, honest. What is it?"
Gel stared at her hands in thought. She had had her speech all planned out, but already she had forgotten it.
"This," she said eventually.
Turning to him and taking his face in her hands, she leant up and kissed him. Just a soft, quick touch on his lips, then he pulled away from her, as if he had been burned.
"Gel... ?"
"I-I'm sorry," The younger girl stammered, getting up hurriedly, "I should have given you more time. I'm sorry."
"More time?" Jack sounded confused for a second, then he saw what she meant, "No, Gel, that's not it."
"It-It's not?"
"No. I'm with someone else now. It's just, no-one knows about it yet."
"What? Who?"
"Amber."
"So that was it. My first kiss. So humiliating! I spent all that time watching him and doting on him and I never even noticed! How stupid must I be! But there's no hope now. Not for me. I've about as much chance winning Jack off the queen of the Mall Rats as I have winning a fight with the queen of the Locos! I can't believe I didn't see it! I can't believe I ever was so stupid as to think that he would ever want to be with me: silly little Gel! He must think I'm an imbecile! He's probably right to, too. I can't believe this hurts so much!
So, am I okay?
No. But I will be."