Living dead.

I've found myself writing again,

On the ground in a dark cave,

I could do better,

I could do worse

Anything just to reverse this curse.

I'm on a dark grey wooden ground in a room, a room with nothing but darkness.

I cant see anything, nothing but my shadow, which is also lifeless.

Can you believe, that this unholy creacher, is still living?

Still in the world where I just cant keep winning.

Just me and my writing notebook,

To write anything I could.

If I could write something creative,

It could work but your mistaken.

I here them banging on the door

Shouting words, I hear them swore,

There's nothing I can do, and nothing I will

I can tell they're wanting me killed.

I'm frightened as it seems.

I'm not stuck in a dream.

This is all in real life.

And that's why I have a knife.

They bang the door down,

They stomp on the ground,

Their finding my room

I hear the sounds

Now it hurts,

In so many ways

But one of these ways

Is what I feel everyday

They've change their minds

Instead they mock me

Is it my fault?

In what they see?

He looks up from the ground

His heart is pounding loud

What will he do next?

He pulls a blade on my neck

I could feel the pain

I swore at them in vain

They did it twice

My face was turned to ice

Blood was rushing down my chest

On my clothes and it made me sick

How could they do this to me?

What did I do to make them angry?

I lied there on the floor

They started heading for the door

My strength was low, I couldn't move

Yet I still tried to

I collapsed again, in pain

My neck was starting to strain

My tears collected dark fluid

Rushed down my face before I new it

This is the end I thought deeply

Is there anyone to save me?

How could you be lifeless?

How could you be cruel?

Cant you see I'm defenceless?

I Have nothing to use.

When they'd left I didn't move,

I had nothing left to choose

I could stay here and die

Or I could shout out and cry.

Help me! Help me! I cannot breath

Someone please, help me

I did nothing wrong to disserve this

And I swear I didn't approve to get this.

People walking pass my home

Starring laughing at what I own

Looking at everything else but me,

They don't understand how many medicals I need.

It's not my fault, I wouldn't dear,

In everything, I don't even care,

Disappointing eyes, laying on me

Please leave me alone, I need to breath.

Please leave me

Leave me be

I don't know what else

To see

I've done all you said

And nothing you didn't

So why does it seem

I'm so forbidden.

You've fucked up my life

So it's not my fault

Life is unfair

As I'm told

People used to say

I was the spitting image

Now all they do

Is spit with privilege.

Fine, just leave me here to die

Its not like the people walking by

Can hear my cries

And even if they did

They'd think I'm out of my mind

The pain I feel

Just had a sudden rush

This wasn't a deal

I did not cut

By now, there's no air to breath

I hear noises, they're crashing around me

Please stop this, it feels like I'm in hell

I think I am because I can tell.

I see a light

But that's not what I really see

Someone has come, come to rescue me

I skatter back

I hear my own words

I don't know what I said

I couldn't understood

Great now I'm talking crap

That makes not sense

Maybe it's because

My brain is intense.

Wait stop!

Please let me die!

Cuz if I do

I'd be closer to him at night

For every drop of blood

That fall's from this second

Will bring me closer to his spirit

I hear noises

That sounded like voices

I hear one say

"This will be his last day"

I feel a tear drop down my face.