This is a very, very late birthday present for my friend, Sarah. I love her to the point of shared insanity, and she's a Kurama fan girl. Since they were sold out of plushies online, this will tie her over. *grins* I'm not going to lie, this is probably considered a crackfic, and it's supposed to be funny. It's also sort of AU (now that I know what that means). Don't get me wrong, I'm going to do my best to keep things realistic and all that but this is more about fun.

And the only thing keeping me from freeing Yusuke or Hiei up is that I like Yusuke/Keiko and I need Iruni to exist in order to have a reason for them all to go to the states in the first place. That and I'm fiercely loyal to my characters lol.

It's also based on my adopted hometown in Idaho, so the people I mention will be funnier to us than anyone else most likely, but hopefully you guys can enjoy it just the same. Also, try and guess which one is me lol. There'll be a few innuendos to things me and my friends share also (the video game scene is altered from a book I'm writing, the Dracula series quotes, the insanity), if you have any questions I can totally answer them. By the way, the language will be a bit more… severe? I'd say mature but that doesn't quite fit lol.

Some scenerios (nachos…) are taken from stories I've only shared with a small group of people, but everyone should enjoy them.

Don't worry about reviewing or liking this story really (though it would be appreciated) it's really just a gift from one psychotic sister to another. Something we share lol. It was supposed to be a quick oneshot but… looks like it might be a few chapters long. Not like my other story, but you know, not exactly a quick and easy fix either. Now onward!

"This is slavery," Yusuke griped as he lugged Iruni's bags around for her. Listening to him whine was giving her and the fire demon at her side each massive headaches.

"Will you shut up already, you crybaby?" she yelled finally. "You're carrying three bags! You're a freaking demon! Shut the hell up!"

"Sheesh," Kuwabara leaned away from the girl, seeking shelter behind the red headed demon in their group. "Someone is testy."

"She's been like this ever since she got that damned phone call. Shinpi doesn't handle her nerves well." Hiei explained calmly, cleaning his nails. Kurama made a face at his short friend. He was way too nonchalant about this.

"You didn't have to come you know," she snapped at all of them. "She invited me. Not any of you. Geez, she's already worried about space. And now she has to cram four men into her home. Her father is absolutely loving this I bet."

"I'm not letting you go that far away without me," Hiei responded smoothly, his eyes dark. "You always end up nearly dead, and then I have to waste my time avenging your mistakes."

"Oh, bite me you midget," she griped, rubbing her forehead where the headache was throbbing. He raised an eyebrow and without looking up she pointed at his nose. "It is a figure of speech, not an invitation, Hiei."

"For now," he smirked and watched as a small amount of color rose on her cheeks.

"So, who is this chick again?" the irritated spirit detective asked before dropping their bags in front of a check-in stand at the airport. Iruni moved forward with their tickets, showing IDs for everyone. No one asked how she'd gotten one for Hiei, and since they weren't arrested they dropped it all together.

"She's a friend of mine from the states," she responded somewhat sharply.

"And why are we going to stay with her for two weeks?" he blinked.

"It's her birthday and I haven't seen her in years, and for whatever reason, she likes me. She invited me, and you losers just tagged along." She sighed, nodding to the attendant before throwing her bag up on a scale. Soon they were all done. "Look, just do me a favor and don't judge me about this, okay? In America, people are different. And since I was sort of an outcast, I sort of got in with a group of people you might not really understand."

"You sound almost worried," Hiei smirked at her.

"We promise to be on our best behavior for your friends," Kurama smiled sweetly, trying to calm his wolf blooded friend. The dead faced look she gave him was not what he had expected.

"It's not you lot that I'm worried about."

Idaho was bright during the summer, the desert near Boise outside of the mountains reflected the undeterred sun back into their eyes from the plane windows. The sky was vast, and a pale blue, the mountains that they did see were slightly purplish in color. Iruni had stated they were in The Rockies. Only Kurama seemed aware of what she meant. Hiei pressed his face against the plastic of the viewing space and noticed the random specks of green turning into full pastures. Lots of animals were stumbling around.

"What the hell are those?"

"Cows, Hiei. One of Idaho's largest commodities." Kurama had done a load of research so that he knew everything about their surroundings from wildlife to take out restaurants. He hadn't found a lot of information on the town they were destined for though.

"You call this a city? Psh. Tokyo could eat four of these and still have room!" Yusuke laughed at the pitifully small sprawling city that was Boise. Iruni shot him a harsh glare.

"Screw you, Urameshi. At least there aren't a bunch of loser delinquents running around trying to be badass demon hunters," she snapped. The fire demon sitting beside her turned to study her tense expression.

You're worried about something. He whispered in her mind.

Obviously. She bit back sarcastically. He raised an eyebrow. Sorry.

What's wrong, Shinpi? He turned back to look out the window. Kurama sat on her other side, leaning over the girl's lap to see out the window as well.

It's beautiful here, isn't it? She thought instead, a small softening occurring on her features. She breathed in deeply. I love the way it is here, it's calmer then back home. It's more open and free. The air is cleaner, somewhat. And there is way more room.

"Hn."

If Yusuke thinks Boise is small, wait until he gets to Mountain Home. The girl sighed, brow furrowed again. The male beside her slipped his hand over hers gently, no one noticing the small movement. He didn't even have to look at her to know she was calming. My friends here, well, they are different. And I can be a little… crazy around them.

He looked at her from the corner of his eyes as Kurama pressed his face to the glass to study the plants. If it had been the detective or moron leaning over his girl he might've growled, but Kurama respected both of them. He was like a brother to the woman, something Hiei appreciated. She needed company when he wasn't there.

Of course his friend deserved his own company.

They touched down not too long after that, and the complaining started before the doors were even opened.

"It's freaking hot as hell," the black haired hanyou complained.

"It's Idaho in the summer you moron, you're in a bloody desert. What did you expect?" Ichi rolled her eyes. "Look, let's just go get our bags alright. Sarah and maybe one other girl should be waiting for us outside the gate."

"So, what's this friend like?" Kurama asked kindly.

"Sarah? She's crazy, but safe enough." The girl blanched slightly. "She's not the one I'm worried about. Though both are pretty… interesting. Cynthia is the dangerous one. Doesn't know when to shut up. Together they are a viral force from hell that even I had to flinch from at one point."

The group balked at that admission making her shrug.

"I tried to convince you to stay home."

"Baka onna, you didn't tell us we would be dealing with hell spawn." Hiei growled, keeping her pace as she calmly walked towards the gate. Two girls were waiting outside, well two that stood out.

One was slightly taller than the other, with long light brown hair that was tied back in a braid. Her eyes were green, shining from a happy face. She had curves on her, something Yusuke pointed out immediately making Kuwabara smack him in the head, and stood in Coach sneakers, jeans and a slightly baggy t-shirt with a picture of a skeleton stuffed animal on it. Her thousand watt smile seemed to be holding back an anxious squeal. Upon comparing her to the other girl it was obvious this one was Sarah.

Cynthia then, was almost her opposite. Firstly she was coated in a fine dust. She was shorter by a few inches and had much less going on in the curves department. She had some, but mostly centered around her butt and hips. A little less proportional than her friend. Her hair was flaming red, hanging down her back from under a black fedora hat. Eyes that couldn't decide whether to be green or blue shined with bad intentions, her lips pulled into a grin. This one wore dirty converse, holey jeans, a Rolling Stones tee and a denim jacket despite the ninety-four degree heat waiting outside.

"Sup?" she greeted casually as they broke through the barrier, Sarah running forward to tackle-hug the small wolf demon. They fell to floor much to the boys' amusement, causing Iruni to fight a blush.

"Hi Sarah," she sighed, trying to breath.

"IRUNI!" the girl squealed happily, still clinging to the other girl's neck. "We've missed our most awesome, cuddly, popcorn stealing, bitch kicking, Japanese friend!"
"Sarah, get off her," Cynthia smirked a bit, eying the others. The two got off the floor. She walked forward and threw a single arm around the dark haired girl with a grin. "How you been, sexy?"
"Busy as all hell," the girl laughed.

"Damn. I can see that," blue-green eyes roved up and down the group of boys. "All of these yours?"

"No, just the short one."

"Double damn." She shook her head. "All the good ones are taken, dead, or gay."

"Or in prison." Sarah pointed out.

"Or stuck on a fucking ranch for the summer. Or on a submarine," the red head looked seriously angry at that thought. "I suck at picking men."

"Aren't you hot?" Yusuke asked, pointing at the shorter of the new pair. She flashed him a deadly smile.

"Thanks for noticing, you aren't too bad yourself Brown Eyes."

"I meant literally. It's hot out there." He rolled his eyes making her laugh.

"He's got no sense of humor," she pulled Iruni along with her arm still around her shoulder. Sarah lead the way. "I got ventilation."

Her finger pointed to the holes in her pants and Hiei snorted.

"Clever."

"Yeah, I have my moments." She shrugged.

"I like your hair," Kuwabara reached forward to touch the long strands of red only to realize his hand had been stopped by the taller girl.

"Cynthia shouldn't be touched…in any way." She warned seriously.

"What's she gonna do?" he blinked.

"I bite." Came the cheeky response as the two others swaggered ahead, laughing about something. Flashing him a glittery eyed wink she added, "Of course, I could make an exception."

"Does she flirt with anything that has a face?" Hiei sounded disgusted. "Because he is the ugliest-"

"Actually, yes," Sarah nodded sagely, ducking behind the orange haired man with a sheepish smile when a glare was cast her way. "Aw. Sorry, sexy!"
"Get your asses up here to get your bags. I ain't no fucking pack mule," the girl snapped instead of retaliating. Everyone raised their eyebrows. "Did I stutter? I said move, damn it."

Iruni threw an apologetic glance over her shoulder, silently muttering an 'I told you so'.

"So, is your hair natural?" Sarah looked up at Kurama with a gentle smile, trying to reel herself in. It looks soft like a baby ducky.

Hiei very nearly dropped his scowl as he tried to conceal his laughter at her thoughts. He'd opened himself up to study these two, wondering how the hell they'd met up with his woman. She was too… withdrawn for them. They seemed to only gain more energy the more time they spent together too.

"What?" he seemed shocked at the question.

"I mean, Cynthia dyes hers, but I don't see your roots. I'm guessing that's your natural hair color." She explained, waving her hand as they marched to the two cars. One was an old black pickup truck with flaky paint, and a dirt bike tied into the bed. It only had one bench for seating. The other was a sleek 2008 Malibu, gunmetal grey and pristine, minus a few scratches.

"It does look nice," the comment was thrown over the smaller girl's shoulder. Her tone didn't hold anything but honesty though. Hiei raised an eyebrow at that. She's hadn't made a single flirtatious comment toward what could be considered the most attractive member of the group.

"Yes, it's natural," he smiled down at the girl and her heart skipped a few beats. He was some other kind of gorgeous than she was used too. Most of the boys they'd grown up with here rednecks, or country, and the ones who were hot had the benefit of ruggedness. This red head was just plain beautiful.

"Alright, let's divide and conquer. Pretty boy, shrimp, and Iruni ya'll are heading back with Sarah. You two jump in my truck, drop your bags in the bed and don't touch my bike or I'll saw your fingers off with rusty butter knives," she still hadn't turned back to look at them. She was busy tightening the straps on the bike after she'd kicked the tire to the side to make more room. A helmet and pair of boots were tucked up against the cab, both covered in grime.

"Is this device why you are covered in dirt?" Hiei asked, eying the mud caked motorcycle.

"Indeed it is, Einstein." She rolled her eyes finally jumping out of the bed. She landed easily on her toes as if she'd done it a million and one times. The boys eyed her. "They call it a dirt bike for a reason."
"It's her third one." Sarah explained for the other girl who had given up on Yusuke being useful and chucked his bag into the bed herself. Kuwabara did his own, smiling kindly. She raised an eyebrow at him. "She has a thing for fast moving objects."

"So why did she buy this rust bucket?" Yusuke kicked her truck's back tire and received a prompt smack to the back of the head.

"It's easier to clean the blood out of the bed than a trunk when I'm hauling bodies around," she responded without missing a beat. "Look, our house isn't getting any closer with us standing here."

"Your house?" Iruni looked between the girls. "You two got a place? I thought we were staying with your parents."

"Actually, Cynthia bought it," Sarah shrugged. "Royalties or something. I just moved in a few weeks ago."
"It's been freaking sweet," the red head announced with a grin. "Best freaking roommate in the world. And Cujo isn't so bad either."

"Her name is Daphnie," the other retaliated blandly.

"Whatever," the girl threw her thumb over her shoulder. "Brown Eyes, Carrot Top, load up. Sarah."

"You'll never defeat me!" the lighter haired girl yelled, running to jump into the driver seat of her car. Everyone exchanged looks except Iruni, who made a point of walking over and choosing to sit in the back seat.

"I'll leave you here, I've got nothing to lose stranger," the short girl leaned out of her window as she spoke to Yusuke, her truck already alive and roaring.

"Except your dignity when I pound your face into the pavement," he muttered. She revved the engine and with a yelp him and Kuwabara jumped in. It was sweltering hot, even the wind was burning, and there was no protection from the sun. Without waiting for them to situation themselves she slammed it into reverse and hit the gas, jumping backwards and effectively cutting Sarah off.

"See ya, bitches!" she yelled out the window, squealing her tires as the truck gunned forward. Yusuke and Kazuma yelled profanities, barely heard.

"These are your friends?" Hiei blinked at Iruni darkly, making her laugh nervously.

"I told you to stay home," she tried to defend herself, then quietly she looked at Kurama who was seated in the front passenger seat in front of Hiei, looking cool as ever in the AC as Sarah punched it out of the space and towards the parking lot exit.

"So, what's your name?" Sarah asked, cranking on the wheel and diving into line. Someone honked and promptly got flipped the bird. Ahead they heard the slightly unbalanced red head cursing out her window as someone slammed on their brakes too fast.

"Oh, damn, I completely forgot to introduce everyone!" Iruni slapped her palm into her forehead. "Hiei is the one beside me, the ones with Cynthia are Yusuke Urameshi and Kazuma Kuwabara."

"I'm Shuichi Minamino," the red head fox smiled.

"We call him Kurama. It's a nickname, like Ichi," she explained when the two demons glared at her.

"So you're the ones who've been keeping my favorite Asian safe and sound." The girl smiled kindly at them. "Thanks. She has quite the temper and I've been worrying."

"What I want to know, is how the hell you managed to keep something as important as Cynthia buying a house away from me." Iruni glared into the review mirror. They'd been exchanging emails sporadically for a few years, more so in the last couple of months, so it shouldn't have surprised her. But it did, and she didn't like it.

They were speeding down the interstate leading from Boise to Mountain Home, doing ninety-five miles an hour in the sixty-five zone. The cackling red head was at least four cars ahead and pulling away. The forty-five miles southeast stretch of I-84 cut through mostly dry land and fenced range territory for the cows.

Sage brush decorated the yellowish ground, as well as thickening grasses as the state went into its second summer as a drought free area. Some deer like animals grazed off to the left, a large herd, looking sleek and graceful.

"This wilderness has a strange attractiveness to it," Kurama noted, looking out the window studiously. Sarah slipped her eyes over to him. He sat straight up, one hand on his chin and his elbow on the door.

"When you said desert I expected something more barren," Hiei noted, his gaze tracking the surroundings. Mountains could be seen in the distance around them.

"I like this version," Iruni smiled softly, her gaze out the opposite glass. He turned to study her instead.

"I wonder how the other two are handling their ride," the green eyed girl stared ahead, trying not to think too much about the man sitting beside her.

"You touch that again, and you die," the short truck owner slapped Yusuke's hand away from the dial of her radio.

"What the fuck is this noise?" he demanded, covering his ears as wind spilled in around them. The only two windows in the vehicle were open, since the AC was declared unsafe by the rampaging midget.

"Country, baby. So, who are you two?" she cut into the passing lane to get around a three trailer long semi. "I never caught your names."
"I'm Kuwabara Kazuma!" the orange haired one yelled valiantly, making her eyebrow raise. She reached between Yusuke's feet and brought her Coke back up to her lips. The detective was pinched between her and his best friend.

"That's backwards right? I mean, since in Japan the last name comes first you're name is really Kazuma Kuwabara." She put the bottle back down and looked at him as he thought about it. "What do you go by cowboy?"

"Kuwabara."

"Alright then, that's all I need to know. Now, what about you Brown Eyes?"

"I'm Yusuke," he looked down at her out of the corner of his eye. "What's all the green crap?"

"Sage." She honked as someone cut into their lane, forcing her to veer over to the much rougher slow lane. "Mother fuc-"

"You've got quite the mouth on you," he noted. With a smirk she nodded, looking up at him.

"Just one of my many great qualities."

"Jesus Urameshi, she almost reminds me of you, in a crazy way." Kuwabara leaned towards the smaller girl. "So, we heard you were the crazy one."

"So, you must the brains," she snapped.

"Do you like, rob people or something?"

"No, I beat the crap out of talkative little boys, speak my mind, and defend my friends. Screw you and your ideas of perfections if I don't fit into your mold for normalcy. I like music. I watch movies. I live my life the way I freaking please and at least I'm happy." She ranted, making Kazuma look up at Yusuke with wide eyes. "Bastards. Why is it that every girl in the world who isn't picture perfect or socially acceptable all the time is insane? Freaking idiotic mainstream standards of social convention."

"She is you!"

"Nineteen minutes! I've set a new record," Cynthia bounced out of the truck only to jump back into the bed. They were parked in front of a small house on the outskirts of a park, a little ways back from the main street. The land wasn't too large but the backyard seemed to take up most of the room. It was fenced in and green.

"My life…flashed before…my eyes," Kuwabara shakily got out of the truck, thankful that solid ground was beneath his feet. Yusuke didn't look much better, his face pale.

"I've seen a lot of really messed up things, but never in my life have I been as scared as I was when that giant truck nearly forced us off the road."

"Hn. I have four wheel drive you jerkoffs. Now grab your stuff, I need to unload my bike." There was a small garage, the door down, and an awning beside it. Under the white sheet metal sat two bikes similar to the one in the truck, along with a pair of pedal bikes and a lawnmower.

"I hope Kurama and the wonder twins are alright," the detective ran a steadying hand through his hair. "Your friend doesn't drive like a bat out of hell, does she?"
"Of course she does." She laughed. "And I wouldn't be calling on any hell bats. You never know if they'll answer."

They held their bags and she kicked the tailgate open, dropping a wooden ramp from it. After unbuckling the straps they watched the small girl singlehandedly roll the motorcycle down and out of the bed. She had to jump halfway down the ramp just to make it down before the bike.

"How much do you weigh?" Kazuma asked curiously, comparing her size to Iruni's. They were close to the same height, except this girl was a bit taller.

"A buck twenty," she shrugged, rolling the bike with the others. Then she brought the ramp and leaned it against the side of the house.

"Can we go inside now?" Yusuke begged, sweat pouring from his forehead and down his neck. She rolled her eyes and walked to the front door.

"It was unlocked, wuss," she glared.

"This isn't a rough town is it?" he blinked, following into the CentralAir cooled building.

"Not when you know the people I know," she smiled. A large bazooka shaped arrangement of plastic piping was leaning against the entryway wall. They two boys gaped at it as the small girl shouldered passed them.

"What is that?" Yusuke demanded, dropping his bag right there and running forward.

"Potato cannon," she shrugged. "You'll see that baby in action tonight. Sarah has a score to settle with some boys from high school."

"You fire potatoes at people?" he blinked at her before his lips slowly grew into a grin. Kuwabara and him shouted at the same time.

"That's so badass!"

Preview: Sarah tries to get know more about her guests while her friend attacks not so innocent bystanders. Kurama wonders what's so strange about this pair, realizing that Yusuke might've met a formidable foe in the nineteen year old red head while they all get introced to some 'Idaho charm'. Kuwabara learns the hard way that maybe playing keep away with nachos isn't such a great game with tempermental teenage girls.

And just what exactly is a demon doing on Cynthia's front lawn? And who the hell would give her a gun?