Cover Photo done for this story by Meynari
Inspiration song for this story is "ЦΣЛУЙ МΣНЯ" by ÑΣVΣR GΣ† U$ΣD †Ø PΣØPLΣ
There was no noise. Not a single sound. And yet, she woke up.
She stared up at the ceiling, feeling a sense of emptiness. She was exhausted. Completely and utterly exhausted. Mentally.
She realized that it was near dawn and yet she didn't wish to wake up. Her body was well rested, yet her mind was lethargic.
Luxanna Crownguard was sick of her life. Everyone thought of her as an amazing individual, to be in such a high position and to be so talented at such a young age. Yet, none of them saw through her blindingly bright facade. No one saw how she had to study and practice 18 hours a day in her youth to get to this point of life. No one saw how she had been drilled into the perfect daughter by her father and mother. She realized, only a few months ago, about how her entire life had passed her by. She didn't have a childhood worth remembering. She didn't really even have friends. Her brother was blinded by patriotism. 'For Demacia,' he would always say.
For Demacia.
A nation of fascists. A city ruled by fear, by fear of the unknown. Fearing something as wonderful and powerful as magic.
Fearing her, that is, if anyone knew.
She had told absolutely no one about her powers. No one knew, not even her brother Garen. He was too blind for his hatred of magic… If she were ever found out to be a mage, she didn't think even he would come to her aid. No, he would probably be the first to hand her over.
To be executed.
She slipped off the bed, her bare feet touching the cool marble floor as she stood up. She walked over to the window, pushing the curtains aside to stare outside. Out at the skies above the city.
Full of glittering stars. An ever spreading tapestry of sparks. Just like her. She liked to believe that her powers came from a star, just like one of the millions up in the sky. People had all said that when her mother was in labour, there had been a shooting star in the sky, falling across the periphery of night, lighting up the city. Most people took it as a good omen, citing it as blessings of the light upon her birth. Perhaps that's why she had been named after Light.
Perhaps the star that had fallen on that day had ended up becoming her. Being born as who she was today.
If only it knew the shackles it would be born into.
She stepped away from the window, sighing softly as she walked over to where her night robe was. She could not sleep tonight, not when so much was on her mind. She needed to get out, out of this room, out of this house, or else she would drown. She would drown in the air that everyone else breathed to live.
Tying on the satin blue robe, she went over and gently opened the door to her room. All was quiet in the house, the hallways dark. She closed the door behind her, trying to be as silent as possible.
It closed with a small click.
She padded through the hallways of her resplendent family mansion, feeling the emptiness and quiet of the house. It was as empty as how she felt inside. Big, ornate, decorated… But empty, without meaning.
She reached the front doors and exited without incident. Getting out of the mansion was one thing, but leaving the grounds was going to be another thing. There were guards all around, patrolling the outer perimeters of her family's estate. Then again, she didn't really care about it.
She made her way down the path towards the gate, only then realizing that she had foregone shoes and was walking barefoot. But the feeling of the cobbled stone under her bare feet… It was good. It was a feeling, a physical feeling that she could actually register through the numbness surrounding her. Just like the bite of the cold winds gently blowing through the night, rising goosebumps on her fair skin, moving only the very ends of her flaxen hair.
She reached the outer gate, where a guard turned around, surprised to see her. He walked over to her, already speaking, "Miss Crownguard? What's wrong? Why are you outside in your nightclothes? Please, let me escort you bac-"
"I would like to go out for a walk."
The guard was slightly confused and stunned by this sentence, before starting again, "Miss Crownguard, please let me escort you back to your room, it is not safe out at night."
"Do you mean to say that there is a lack of safety in our glorious city of Demacia?" She said, knowing this would get the result she wanted.
The guard sputtered for a few moments, obviously caught by her question, before straightening up. "No… Of course not, my lady."
"Open the gate, I shall return before sunrise."
"Yes, my lady. But I must insist, your brother will not be pleased to hear about this."
The guard opened the gate as Lux's lips curled into a weak smile, her eyes downcast. "Yeah… Add it to the list."
"I'm sorry, lady?"
"Nothing. Never mind." She said, with another bright smile.
The guard only stared at her, still concerned, but she walked through the gate and continued out.
The Crownguard estate was within the part of the city reserved for nobility, and as such, very wide expanses of land were devoted to natural beauty between the houses. Forests, where the nobles could go hunting for pleasure. It was still within the walled confines of the great citystate, but still large enough to be its own little world.
Lux didn't remember when she broke off the road, the rough stone under her bare feet being replaced by harsh gravel and then soft, damp grass. The feeling was… pleasant. This was where she would always sneak off to whenever life felt too much for her, whenever she had nights like this where she wanted nothing more than to run away from all of her problems, from all of these expectations that weighed down on her, from the stress of hiding who she really was from her own family…
Slipping into the forest, she followed the familiar trail that only she knew off, marked by tiny little signs she left on the trees, allowing the starlight drifting in through the gaps in the foliage above to light her way. Finally, she came upon a small clearing, where a little pond lay, the water supplied through underwater tunnels connecting it to a lake farther beyond. The lake was well known to people, but this little pond in this little clearing… This was her little secret.
The whisper of fabric as she untied her robe and slipped it off was the only sound in the clearing, aside from the subtle sounds of water and the distant muffled sounds of forest critters. She had no fear of any dangers here, as the forests for these nobles were well regulated. There were no predators, only prey.
Stepping closer towards the pond, her bra fell to her feet next, and she took a deep breath, filling her lungs to the fullest, tasting the fresh air, relishing the kiss of the cool night sky on her exposed skin. She slipped the last article of clothing off her legs near the water's edge, before stepping into the water. The first step caused her to utter a soft sound as she gasped from the cold. The water wasn't that cold, but there was always that initial shock from the difference.
She slowly waded into the water, allowing herself to adjust to the temperature slowly, delighting in every step as it gave her more and more to feel, to fill that emptiness inside of her, until she was near the middle of the pool, the water up to her neck. Here, she felt a sense of peace. Outside, everything was choking, suffocating, the numbness surrounding her like a black cloud. But here, the water replaced that pressure, that darkness. Here, the water gave her a comforting presence, a pressure on her skin that she could understand, could embrace. It filled that echoing emptiness inside of her by surrounding her with its beautiful embrace.
She took a deep breath, before submerging herself fully underwater. She pulled her head down, curling up under the water, the sounds of the night being ended by the closed silence of water. Yet, even this silence was better. This silence was a good silence, and it drowned out the screams of her mind. She opened her eyes, seeing her hair floating around her face, barely illuminated by the moonlight penetrating the surface of the water.
Her lungs began to burn for air and for a second there, just for a second, she contemplated opening her mouth and taking a deep breath, filling her lungs with the water of the pond she loved so much instead of the oxygen her body depended on…
It would be so easy… Just a parting of her lips…
She raised, her head breaking the surface of the water as she rose up, breathing out and releasing the air that had been trapped in her lungs, replacing it with a fresh breath. She remained still like that, the water dripping off her hair, down her face, as she stared down at the water. It took her a while to register that some of the droplets on her face wasn't from the water.
If only life was as easy as this moment, right now. If only she could always have this peace of mind.
She frowned. There was something suddenly different with the night. A certain kind of…
Silence.
She turned slowly in the water, towards the way she had come from.
And she was greeted by the sight of a man standing there, shirtless, wearing ionian clothes and armor below the waist, splattered with blood and holding a great scythe at his side. And his eyes… one of them was literally glowing at her, a deep crimson color.
"Well, this is a surprise." The man said.