"It sucks, but it's the job," Alex grunted, meeting Jo's gaze over the crib.
"Really?" she shot him a sad disbelieving look before fleeing the NICU.
Alex turned to follow her, but Bailey's voice stopped him, "Let her go. You..." He didn't stick around to hear what else she was going to say. He ignored her advice and took off after his clearly very upset girlfriend.
Jo was standing at the window in the back of a storage room looking out when he finally found her, "Look, Jo.."
She quickly wiped her eyes before turning to face him, "Don't, Alex, you don't have to say anything. I'm fine. You're right. It's the job; I just need to toughen up or whatever." She tried to brush past him, but he caught her arm turning her to face him once again.
He lifted her chin forcing her to meet his eyes, "You are tough, but you have a soft spot, and that's okay; it makes you a good doctor. But..." he rubbed a hand along the back of his neck and blew out a puff of air, "Look, you think I don't feel it every time a patient dies? I do, but I can't break down, because the next patient is right in front of me, and the next, and the next. You have to look ahead to the next patient you can save."
"Yeah, but..."
"And yeah, it sucks; it's horrible and it's sad, but it is the job. The worst part of the job." He pulled her into his arms. "But hey, the baby is good and the dad, he's doing okay... so today we beat the universe two to one. That's a pretty good day." She gave him a shaky smile and stood up on her toes pressing a kiss to his lips. "Now come on," he took her hand and led her back out into the hallway, "let's go back to the NICU and check on Dan, and then get out of here."
Alex listened to the baby's heart and lungs and made a note of his vital signs. He was stable. "Here," he gently picked the baby up and handed him to Jo.
"Alex, no I.." she protested shaking her head.
He ignored her, placing the baby in her arms. "It helps, doesn't it?"
She looked down at the baby who was blinking up at her with sleepy eyes and smiled a small teary smile, "Yeah, it kinda does," she agreed.
Later that night at home, Alex ran a bubble bath and poured two glasses of wine. "Bobby Brinn," he said handing Jo a glass and sinking into the warm sudsy water with her.
"What?" she asked, her face scrunched up in question, "He was the tumor in a bag kid, right?"
"Yep, we crushed Phil," he confirmed taking a sip of his wine, "and Santa Claus," he said pointing at Jo with his glass, "you completely changed his life." He continued reminiscing about all of her successes since starting at Grey Sloan. "You look ahead to the next patient, and you look back at the ones you have saved, not to forget the ones you've lost, but to remember why you do what you do. To remember why you became a doctor in the first place. To remember the best part of the job."
Jo reached for his hand linking their fingers together and squeezing, "Thank you, Alex," she breathed, resting her head back and closing her eyes letting the stress of the day dissolve.