Summary: She used to believe that the world was beautiful. Now she knew better: there was nothing beautiful left in the world. And then, suddenly . . . there was. (Leah/OC; One-shot)
Beautiful
The sky was bluer, then. The stars shone brighter. Beauty was everywhere: in the sound of laughter, in the dance of sunlight on his dusky skin, in the frosty bite of autumn air . . . in the love in his eyes when he looked at her. Everything was laughter and happy dreams, and when Leah looked to the future, it was beautiful too.
And then came reality. . . . If mystical werewolf Imprinting that screwed up your life could be considered, in any measure, 'reality'. Emily Young walked through the door, and suddenly Sam was looking at her with adoration in his eyes; at her like she made his world beautiful.
That was the day that Leah died. How could she survive? Slowly, over the years of their relationship, she'd become Sam's Leah; it'd been cemented when they became engaged. And when that was gone, Leah was too.
She became Bitter Leah; Angry Leah; Broken Leah. All of these things were apart from Sam's Leah, so they could survive without him; survive the aching knowledge that his devotion belonged to someone else. Survival, though, was not the same thing as living. Leah died the day that Fate or some twisted karma decided that Sam's soul mate was Emily: all that was left was survival, and the hopeless, mindless struggle to escape the pain that survival brought with it.
It was worse, even, when she became a werewolf and found out that Sam's leaving her had been dictated by Mother Nature, rather than any choice he had made. Before, at least, she'd had the comfort and refuge of hate: now even that was denied to her. Every day she was subjected to Sam's thoughts, his guilt and pity towards her, and worst of all, the complete, absolute adoration he held for Emily. She was his universe; he needed her. He could no more have denied the imprint and chosen Leah than a flower could deny its longing for the sun. Seeing all of this in his mind, it was impossible for Leah to hate him. Resentment, yes, bitterness she could feel: but she couldn't hate him. So she hated the world instead, for ever letting her believe that its beauty was meant for her eyes.
Imprinting. It was inescapable. Even when she switched to Jacob's pack with her brother and finally got away from sharing tortuous mindspace with Sam, the relief was only temporary. Jacob, perhaps the only person who could have understood in any measure what she was going through, was taken in by the horrid event as well. He Imprinted on the half-leech, the unnatural little demon spawn of a human and vampire, and his sickeningly lovey-dovey thoughts were all the worse for having no distractions from them in the form of other pack members.
She'd gotten used to the feeling of being needed. When he was being used and taken for granted by that selfish leech-lover, Bella, it was Leah who took her to task for it, even against Jacob's wishes. When he needed someone to run patrols so that he could be a sucker for punishment and pursue his masochistic obsession with Bella, Leah and her brother were there. And when the young Alpha just needed someone who could really understand what he was going through, without trying to change it or comfort him, he could always take refuge in her pain-filled thoughts, as she took refuge in his. But all that was gone, once he Imprinted. He didn't need her anymore: he had his Loch Ness Monster.
Leah lived for Seth and Sue, and because she was just too damn stubborn to die. Fate had dealt her blow after blow, but no way in hell was she going to give in under the abuse. She lived out of defiance, and loyalty to the few good things she still had in the world: her family, and, sometimes, the pack.
She used to believe that the world was beautiful. Now she knew better: there was nothing beautiful left in the world.
And then, suddenly . . . there was.
He had messy brown hair and tanned skin, and clear hazel eyes went on for miles. He was her air; her gravity; her anchor; her heartbeat; her soulmate; her Imprint. He was all that mattered.
Almost in a daze, Leah came forward, pulled by an invisible, irresistible force. Her eyes never left his.
"Hi," she murmured, an amazed, loving smile spreading over features unused to such a movement. "I'm Leah." Just Leah. Not Bitter Leah, not Broken Leah, not Sam's Leah.
He smiled back at her, something new dawning in his gaze . . .
And the world was beautiful again.
AN: First: oodles of thanks and virtual pats-on-the-back to my unreasonably awesome beta, Ambrosien, for pointing out some flaws in this story (and assuring my that it was, in fact, worth posting). Second: review, people! Critique, cookies; preferably no insults, but if you have something to get off your chest . . . I can't read your thoughts, so help me out here! :D
~Killer Zebra
P.S. I sound a bit like a Nessie/Bella/Cullen-hater here . . . I'm not, really. I was just speaking from Leah's point of view.