Never wake a sleeping Klingon

How Tom Paris narrowly escaped a horrible death at the beginning of his relationship with B'Elanna Torres. Translation of my German fanfic "Schlaf oder Leben".

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„Good morning!"

With extreme effort, Torres lifted her left eyelid. Tom Paris was standing in front of her bed – beaming and obviously he has been awake for quite a while. By all means, he was already shaved and wore a fresh T-shirt and boxer shorts. Psychopath.

"What time is it?"

"Seven o'clock already!"

B'Elanna's so laboriously opened eyelid snapped back automatically. "Good night, Tom!"

"Come on, B'Elanna, rise and shine. The early bird catches the worm."

Tom had just shortened his life expectancy to about 15 seconds. Didn't this loony know that you should never wake a sleeping Klingon? And why shouldn't you do it? Because, they got pissed. Really, really pissed. He was lucky that this special Klingon cared for him. Yet.

"You're about to catch my fist – with your nose!" B'Elanna grumbled. "Go away!"

"Come on, B'Elanna, we have a wonderful day off ahead of us."

B'Elanna didn't trouble herself by trying to understand how a day starting at seven o'clock in the morning could possibly be wonderful. In her opinion, there shouldn't be more than one seven o'clock a day – especially a day off. Therefore, she only grunted and buried her face deep into her pillow.

"I wonder how you ever manage to get on duty on time," Tom commented, shaking his head.

"Firstly, until now I've always been able to get a good night's sleep and secondly, I'm the boss. When I get on duty is on time," B'Elanna growled from the depths of her pillow.

"Well, live isn't that easy for us bridge officers, especially when you're on the same shift as the Captain or – even worse – Tuvok," Tom remarked cheerfully. "But you can't deny that what we did last night was much better than a good night's sleep."

„Unscrupulous sex is highly overrated," B'Elanna grumbled. How could a human be so cheerful and full of energy at this time of the morning? Unnatural. Did the guy take anything? When she was going to be awake, she would reprogram the replicators in any case. No coffee for Tom Paris anymore. Well, maybe decaff. But only, if he left her alone now.

"Come on, B'Elanna."

A small jolt told B'Elanna that Tom had been about to pull her blanket away. Luckily for him he changed his mind at the last moment.

"Go away!"

"I've got holodeck time for us," Tom tried to lure her.

"Go away!"

"I'll make you breakfast."

"Go away!"

"You can come with me into the shower."

"Go away!"

Still, this idea wasn't that bad ...

„How about ... "

"How about you returning to bed and in an hour or two we continue our private work-out from last night."

„With private work-out you mean ...?"

„Yep."

„Hmm, that's an idea of course," Tom remarked. "I know a few exercises that you will love ... "

Gratefully B'Elanna noticed how the mattress moved under her as Tom crawled back into bed. When she snuggled up to him, he put his arms around her and whispered into her ear: "Sleep well my sleeping beauty and gather some energy – you are going to need it."

He was so lucky that she was already asleep again by then.