"KANADE!" I shouted hopelessly into the empty sky. The lack of response and sudden loneliness left me pained. My mind aching for the girl I lost.

I fell on my knees and flailed my arms as if hoping to reclaim her from the sky... But she was gone... She just disappeared... Like she was never there in the first place...

I sat there for what must have been hours, just trying to get grips with what had happened. The tears just kept coming –tears that I knew were no longer in my control.

She was gone... Just like that. And now I'm never going to see her again...

My mind was clouded with thoughts of dread and deceit, when one sparked in my head; did people even remember what happened here after they move on..? The thought hit me harder then a rock, the match was ignited and now the thought wouldn't leave my mind. Would Kanade even remember me...? Would she be born like any other human being without the slightest recollection of what had happened between them? Would she fall in love with someone...?

I began to recompose myself and I slowly stood, forcing the thoughts aside. I tried to make myself think clearly, but the lack of realism was making it increasingly harder. It felt like... It wasn't actually happening. Once the pain wore off I just felt... numb. Everything suddenly seemed so surreal, like I'd wake up and it would just be a bad dream. I'd wake up... and Kanade would be there...

She would tell me that she loved me and I would hold her in a tight embrace. Then I'd tell her about my dream and we'd both laugh it off like a silly nightmare and she'd promise to never leave me...

But that wasn't reality... THIS was reality. This was real... and nothing I could ever do would change that.

I looked at my hands as if trying to prove they were real and that Kanade was in fact, gone.

'What will I do now!?' My mind screamed to me whilst I silently begged the sky for a non-existent answer. I then felt a warmth in my chest; a beat. Of course. Kanade had my heart... but now she's gone... and now my heart belongs to me again... But something was missing... My heart is beating... But there's no Angel... My heart's missing Kanade. And for as long as she's gone, my heart won't be full.

Just beats without an Angel.

I clenched my hands that I was still staring at. I was now certain without a shadow of doubt she was gone... and I hated it.

There's no one left now, no one but me. I am alone. 'What am I going to do' I thought to myself darkly. I can't move on... Not now... My minds to empty to let me. And what of the people that come after me? Are they destined to move round in circles like the SSS did for so long? No. I can't let that happen. I have to stay, to help the people find peace!

But how can I do that!? Could I really force myself to help others? To get close to them and lose them like I did with all the others? Meeting and losing people until I becomes completely consumed by the loneliness and succumb to insanity?
I can't do that! I won't! But... what other choice do I have?

I dropped my hands and looked to the sky "Is this what it's like, Kanade? Is this what it's like to be forced to live on in a world where your friends are gone?' I asked to the sky, knowing an answer would never come. The sky's so beautiful, it should make me happy but instead... I just feel sorrow...

I had really come to face it now... No matter what would happen, I was bound to a life of sacrifice. That was all life had ever been to me... Sacrifice. I sacrificed my childhood to help my sister, my adulthood to become a doctor... even my very life force to help the people on the train... And now I had no choice but to sacrifice everything to help people in the future pass on. After going through all that I thought at very least I would get something back from the world- Kanade, for whom I donated my heart. But no... I even had to sacrifice her. And what do I get in return? Yes, I got my heart back... but it was an empty heart; just beats without Angel.

"Is this what you want God!?" I thought bitterly to the sky. The sorrow that I had was now mixed with rage, which then turned to resentment... then despair.

"I'm all alone..." I said to the floor.

"Otanashi...?" I heard a voice say behind my back. My eyes widened. 'I know that voice...' I turned around, sure that I was wrong, but... I was right... "Naoi..."How was this possible...? He passed on... I saw him pass on. But here he is, right before my eyes in the light of day. With the same dark green hair and piercing eyes. He gave me a worried yet comforting smile of admiration while I could only respond with a confused gaze.

I then noticed my eyes were still teary, which probably explained his worried expression. This isn't real... He isn't here. I tried to tell myself. Out of nowhere Naoi ran up to me and hugged me in a surprisingly strong but friendly hug. His hands wrapped around me gave me a warmth I longed for. And I was more then happy to accept this much needed company. But as happy as having a friend made me feel I couldn't shake the confusion.

When Naoi finally let go I put my hands on his shoulders, "How are you...?" I said sterner then I meant to, unable to finish the sentence. I then noticed something, Naoi looked just as confused as me. "I-I-I... I don't know.." He replied. I shook him slightly; desperate for anwsers. "But you dissapeared!" I exclaimed no longer thinking about my choice in words. "I-I-I know... I mean I did! But..." He looked down as if in deep thought, "I came back..." He finished.

"But why!?" I said so loudly it was almost a shout. Naoi put his hands on my arms which were still tightly holding onto his shoulders. I loosened my grip slightly when he looked me in the eye sympathetically. "I... I think it's because you were sad... I'm not at peace if your not... and that brought me back..." I blinked a couple of times. Could this be true? Was Naoi's love for a friend like me so strong that it could bring him back to the afterlife? And another thing, how did Naoi know how I felt whilst he wasn't even potentially here? "I think it's because my mind abilities are getting... stronger." He said and took his hands from my elbows and grabbed my wrists. It took me a moment to realise before I noticed something, I didn't say that out loud... "Wait, y-y-you..." I stuttered and Shouted at the same time." Naoi nodded, "Yes Otanashi, I knew you were sad because... I could feel your pain. And that is what lead me here"

I felt completely taken aback, Naoi had more then mind control powers he was a telepathic. Suddenly a wave of guilt washed over me and my arms flexed in Naoi's grip. "You mean to tell me... I'm the reason you're stuck here..." I said and looked down at the floor. I felt Naoi's grip on my wrist drop and I looked up to see what he was doing. He looked at me, more determined then ever. "Yes. And I wouldn't have it any other way!" He smiled at me, "I want to stay here with you! To help guide souls and help them pass on!" I was surprised with how resolute he sounded, his determination, his courage. What I did to earn his admiration, I'll never know.

"I-I...I can't" I said blankly and turned around so my back was facing Naoi. I didn't want him to know I was crying... I heard his voice soften as he spoke the next words "It's what she would want..." I clenched my fists. Every mention of her sent needles through my mind. "It doesn't matter, because I'm never going to see her again," I said coldly. Naoi put a hand on my shoulder softly, "Even if she does completely forget you, you'll meet her again. Because you two are meant to be together. Because your bond is stronger then fate."

I closed my eyes. Naoi's words echoed through my head, repeating themselves over and over. Easing the pain ever so slightly. "Do you... Do you really think so?" I asked and stared at his hand resting on my shoulder. "Yes, I'm almost certain!"

Almost!? What the hell was that meant to mean!? I thought to myself. "You will meet again..." Naoi started. I blinked a couple of times before remembering he could read my mind. "But, on the odd chance you never do- on the slightest slither of a chance." He added hastily "It won't matter. Because you are Otanashi and I know that you will get past this, because you can get past anything! Because you are strong, stronger then I could ever be. Yes, it hurts now. But one day... The pain will stop." As Naoi spoke these words of encouragement I felt a bulk of hope build up inside me.

Yes, I can get through this. The same way I got through the loss of my sister... Maybe... just maybe... I can get through the loss of Kanade. One day...

I rose my head and gave a determined smile. For the first time since Kanade vanished, I wasn't confused. Everything seemed clearer now, the world presented itself in a new light. I no longer saw staying here as a curse, but an opportunity.

Naoi's hand dropped from my shoulder and he gave a proud smile, obviously taking my smile as a sign of acceptance. My determined smile... That was all he needed to know my response. I gave him a serious look "Are you sure? If you agree to stay here, then there's no going back." Naoi nodded immediately with the admiring smile he so often gives me. "Yes! I will follow you to the grave if I have to! Besides, being god gets lonely sometimes! " I laughed slightly and poked him in the head. "So it's settled! You and I shall stay here, we'll help people find peace together!" I said as we banged our fists together to seal the deal. " I promise to never leave you Otanashi! Now... Can we go get some food..? I'm starving... Being obliterated really makes you hungry..." He said fidgeting with his hands and feet like an idiot. I chuckled slightly. "Sure thing kiddo, you go ahead I'll join you in just a minute." I said to him. He looked up at me with a face of excitement. "Okay! I promise to save a place for you!" He said running off.

I smiled as I watched Naoi run off into the distance. Naoi, does our friendship really run so deep that you'd be there for me even after the afterlife? 'Hm,' I mumbled to myself. Oh Naoi, friends like you are hard to find...

I couldn't help but ponder a final question though, why didn't we both disappear jut now? I have my heart back, and thanks to Naoi I found peace. Doesn't that mean I should have passed on? And the only thing holding Naoi back was me, so shouldn't he have passed along when he saw I was happy? I thought about it for only a few moments before the answer struck me. I couldn't pass along because I didn't want to leave Naoi alone. And Naoi couldn't pass along because he didn't want to leave me alone... And more importantly, neither of us wanted to...

I turned around to grab the railing with both hands as I looked to the sky. Kanade was gone, and it hurt. But Naoi, was right; it wont hurt forever. I'll just have to trust in the hope we'll meet again. Like how I hope that one day I'll meet my sister...

But even if we do never meet again, I know that I'll always get by. Because that's what you would want me to do. Right Kanade? Maybe she gave my heart back as a way of telling me to survive without her. And maybe she was right... Maybe it was about time that I started living for myself.

And yes, it does hurt that I can't see her. And yes, until we meet again my heart will never be full. But I know I'll get by. Like I always have.

My Angel Beats may be missing it's Angel...

But it continues to beat...

So I promise to you Kanade...

I will continue...

For my heart still beats

It just beats with no Angel.

So there's my first fanfic, hope you enjoyed it! :) Criticism is welcome. I'll probably keep this a a one-shot but if you would like me to continue feel free to ask me. I made this for my good friend Sophie! (Hey Sophie!) I decided to use Naoi because it's her favourite character.