I hadn't meant for things to turn out like that. When I'd suggested that Craig told Sarah how he really felt I meant that the should let her know he wasn't comfortable with her new modelling career, not that he should blow up and give her his little "it's me or the modelling" speech.
Silly thing is I don't know why I felt so bad about them arguing like that, it's not like I wanted them to stay together. Surely if they broke up it would make things easier for me?
Yet somehow I still found myself at the door to Craig's flat, hoping that I could make things right for him.
The door was open slightly and I could see Craig through the gap. He was stood with his back to me, his shoulders hunched up in anger or frustration and I had to take a deep breath before I knocked. With Craig you never really know what you're gonna get, he can have a volatile temper if you push him but then again, so can I.
"Get out." Craig didn't even look around but he still knew it was me. I couldn't help but wonder if I was that predictable, was it that obvious that I would follow him upstairs?
"Craig… ring her…" I suggested gently, "Tell her you're sorry."
"And why would I wanna do that?" Craig snarled back at me.
"Cause you didn't mean it – did ya?"
"You know me and Sarah might have muddled through this, but no – Be honest with her Craig… tell her how you're feeling..." The bitterness was heavy in Craig's words and I felt the weight of them. It's always somebody else's fault with Craig, never his.
"You hide away from your emotions all the time alright, you run away…" I sighed lightly as I spoke. Sometimes I just wish I could reach him, make him see what he's doing but sometimes, like this time, he seems so very far from me.
"Most people spend their lives running away, why should I be any different?"
"Cause it'll destroy you." It might seem a melodramatic thing to say but I knew it was true, the longer he tries to fight who he is and what he wants the more of himself he stands to lose.
"What's to destroy?" Craig snapped, finally turning to me. The anger in his eyes flashed deeply inside the rich brown depths and the sight took my breath away. But then the sight of him always takes my breath away, sometimes I find myself simply staring at him, remembering how he feels and tastes and smells. "Me and Sarah are finished," Craig continued, his anger growing with every word, "so if you don't mind… get out of my flat!"
Craig's anger seemed to fill the space between us as his hand points towards the open door way. But I had no intention of leaving just because he told me to.
"You're pushing everyone away aren't you?" I told him quietly. All I really wanted to do at that moment was kiss him and tell him everything would be OK but I couldn't. Why couldn't I?
Craig snorted a sneering laugh at me. "You are so wrong," he said through gritted teeth. "All I want is an honest relationship."
I heard the words from Craig's lips but I couldn't quite believe he was saying them. What had been honest in Craig's life recently? Certainly not his relationships.
"Honest!" I replied sarcastically. "That's a laugh. You're lying through your teeth to Sarah… you're messing me about…"
"You can talk – what about Hannah? You haven't exactly been honest with her," Craig snapped back putting me instantly on the defensive. I knew what I had done to Hannah and I didn't need Craig reminding me. "And Spike?" Craig continued. He knew that he had hit a raw nerve and at that moment neither of us was prepared to back down. I might have been in the wrong over Hannah and Spike but Craig was in no position to take the moral high ground.
Without thinking my hands collided with Craig's chest, sending him staggering back a few steps. I could feel my jaw set firmly and I knew that the anger in my eyes matched that flashing inside Craig's.
Stepping forward Craig's hands smashed into my chest, pushing me backwards until I hit a table behind me.
I could feel my chest heaving, mirroring that of Craig's, as our eyes locked in a struggle for dominance. At that second neither of us were prepared to give an inch and the tension was thick between us.
There was no conscious thought on my part, no decision being made. I moved on instinct, on impulse, my actions fuelled by anger but more than just anger, fuelled by desire.
My body crashed into Craig, forcing him back against the wall and I could hear the air rush from his lungs but I didn't give him time to regain his breath before my mouth was on his.
My kiss was hard and rough as I pressed the weight of myself against Craig, pinning him to the wall so that he couldn't move. Craig struggled against me, trying to push me off and turn from my kiss but I held him firm, grinding my groin into his and taking satisfaction as I felt his growing erection rubbing against my already hard cock.
My tongue plundered Craig's mouth as my hands fought with his belt. I moved back slightly to allow myself access to Craig's trousers and pushed my hand inside to grip his cock firmly. I could feel it throb and pulse in my grip as I stroked over its length, making it harder with each pass of my fingers until Craig's arousal was at its peak.
Pulling back from the heat of our kiss I took in the beauty of Craig's face. His lips were pink and full, glistening with my saliva, parted slightly as he panted. His eyes were wide, almost black, and desperate, desperate for me.
"I'm gonna fuck you," I said breathlessly. I'd never said that to him before, not like that, and the very sound of the words in my own voice made me shiver with lust. I don't know if it was the adrenalin from my anger that was heightening my senses but at that moment I don't think I had ever wanted him more. Part of me even wanted him to carry on struggling against me; I think I wanted to take control of him, to have him at my mercy. I wanted to possess him, completely.
My hand gripped tighter around Craig's cock, squeezing it hard and making him whimper. Pushing my other hand into the back of Craig's trousers I began to fondle his buttocks, slowly working my fingers between them until I could tease at the tight opening nestled between them.
Craig's chest rose and fell heavily with each breath that he pulled into his lungs. He gasped as my fingertip circled around his opening, an action I mirrored over the head of his cock, making moan in lustful agony.
Leaning forward I pressed my mouth into Craig's neck and bit him. Hard. I knew what I was doing could leave a mark but I didn't care. Or maybe I did care. Maybe I wanted to mark him, to claim him, to let the world know that he was mine. Craig Dean belonged to me.
As I sunk my teeth deeply into Craig's neck I pressed the weight of my body against him, forcing my fingertip to breach the tightness of his flesh and drive hard into him. Craig cried out as I pushed my finger deeper, his hands gripping onto my shoulders as I tormented his body without mercy.
"Not here…" Craig panted trying, without much effort, to push me from him.
Looking into Craig's eyes again I could see the confusion. He wanted me. More than anything at that moment he wanted me and I knew that he would let me take him right there and then if I insisted. The very thought of fucking him in the middle of that room where anyone could walk in and find us excited me. The idea of exposing him, exposing us, was like an aphrodisiac and I stroked Craig's cock harder and faster as I considered my next move.
But then I saw deeper in his eyes something that wasn't lust or desire. I saw the fear and I knew I couldn't do it to him.
Pulling my hands from Craig's trousers I grabbed his arm and dragged him towards the bedroom. I might have been bowing to Craig's will but I was still going to be the one in charge.
Slamming the bedroom door closed behind us I reached for Craig once more. I frantically began to pull at his clothes. I needed him naked, I needed to see him, to touch him and consume him. I needed his body to be completely mine.
Craig's clothes were soon dropped into a pile on the floor, his shoes kicked to one side as he stepped from his trousers.
The sight of his naked body was almost enough to make me come. He really was the most gorgeous of all the world's creations and I couldn't help but marvel at him as I ran my fingers lightly over his firm toned chest, scratching my nails over the inside of his thighs and running the flat of my palm over the length of his hard proud cock.
"Get on the bed," I instructed him firmly. "On your hands and knees."
Without question Craig climbed onto the bed, positioning himself on all fours in its centre, his soft rounded buttocks presented to me, waiting for my inspection, for my attention.
Climbing behind him I ran my hands the length of Craig's beck, along the tanned skin until it reached the paler tones of his behind. Craig took a deep breath as I pushed his buttocks apart with my hands and blew between them, making the tight rosebud of his anus twitch with anticipation.
Pushing my face against Craig's flesh I ran my tongue along the cleft between his buttocks, making Craig gasp with delight. I knew just how much he loved it when I did that and how it would make him ache for more.
I prodded my tongue firmly into his opening, swirling inside him as it allowed me ever deeper, his body relaxing, submitting to me.
I couldn't wait any longer. I needed to be inside him, my cock was straining inside my jeans and I fell back to my heels to free my aching desire.
Pushing my jeans and boxers down enough to free my cock I spat on my hand and coated my length with saliva, mixing it with the precum that glistened from my tip before guiding myself against Craig's waiting hole.
Rather than push immediately into Craig, which is what I desperately wanted to do, I hesitated, circling the head of my cock around his opening and making Craig moan with frustration.
"You want me to fuck you don't you?" I teased, pushing forward slightly, but not quite hard enough to enter him.
"Yes…" Craig gasped.
"You want to feel my dick deep inside you?"
"Yes…"
"Then tell me…"
"What?"
"Tell me you want it… ask me to fuck you…"
"John Paul… I…"
"Say it," I urged, I wanted to hear him say those words so badly. "Tell me…" My cock pressed harder against Craig's hot flesh and it took all of my strength not to plunge deep inside him.
"God John Paul I…" Craig's voice trembled and the sound of it turned me on even more. "I want you… I want you inside me… oh Christ John Paul fuck me… fuck me hard…"
Gripping Craig's hips tightly I drove my cock deep inside him making Craig cry out. I was aware of the initial discomfort he would be feeling but I didn't stop, I couldn't stop. Craig's hot flesh wrapped tightly around my cock and I moaned loudly as I watched it being swallowed completely by Craig's body.
Without pause I pulled back until only the head of my cock was inside him and then slammed forward again, harder this time, faster, I wanted him so badly that I couldn't control myself.
Within seconds I was fucking him with an aggressive passion that I never knew I possessed. Craig's fingers were curled into the duvet as my cock drove into him, harder and faster with each thrust. The room echoed with the sound of flesh against flesh and the moans of pleasure that growled from both of us.
"Oh god Craig…" I could already feel my climax building as I rode his gorgeous body as hard as I could, my fingers gripping onto his hips so hard I was bound to have bruised him.
"Fuck me John Paul…" Craig panted, "Harder… god fuck me harder…"
My cock was throbbing deep inside Craig's tight passage and I knew I would come within seconds; I bit down on my lip and then stopped. With a deep breath I forced myself to pull out of him, I didn't want it to be like this.
"What… why…" Craig turned his head to look at me with confusion.
"Turn over," I said softly, shuffling back so that Craig could manoeuvre to lie on his back. I didn't just want to fuck him, I wanted to make love to him and I wanted, no I needed, to be able to see into his eyes when I came.
Moving back between Craig's thighs I lifted his legs onto my shoulders and eased my cock back inside him, slowly this time, enjoying every inch of him as our eyes locked together. Once my cock was completely inside him Craig's legs fell from my shoulders, wrapping around my waist to pull me closer to him.
Our mouths crashed together as I began to move inside him once again, my pace quickly increasing as our tongues danced in the heat of our mouths.
Pushing my hand between us I curled my fingers around Craig's cock. I was so close to release but I so desperately wanted to feel Craig come, to see that look in his eyes and hear him cry out my name with such passion.
Craig's hands pulled at my t-shirt to claw at the skin beneath as we panted hotly into each other's mouths.
"Oh god John Paul…" Craig's eyes were wide and his cock pulsed hotly in my hand, I knew he was close and so was I; it was impossible to tell who would explode first.
Raising myself up slightly I thrust harder and faster into the tightness of Craig's body, my hand running the length of his throbbing cock, urging him to give in.
"Come for me Craig," I groaned, "God I want to hear you come…"
"Oh fuck John Paul…" Craig's legs tightened around me, desperate to force me deeper as his body trembled around me, his flesh contracting around my cock until it had no resistance left.
"Oh god yes I…" Craig's back arched, his hands grabbing at my buttocks as he shook with the power of his climax. The hot white of his lust spattered against his bare chest as he came.
"Craig I…" The tremors shook my body as I gave in to my desire, my cock throbbing inside the perfect housing of Craig's flesh. Craig's eyes locked with mine as I came, my body submitting to its worship of Craig. "I love you…" The words fell from my lips as the heat of desire poured from my cock and Craig's eyes echoed the words back to me, even if his voice didn't.
Pressing my mouth to Craig's gently I reluctantly pulled back from him. My lips brushing briefly over his jaw-line and down his throat until my tongue darted out and lapped at the droplets of come covering his chest, licking it clean while Craig watched me with amazement.
"You're mine," I told him as I finally fell back onto the bed beside him.
"I know," Craig replied as he moved to rest his head against my chest. "I know."