(A/N)
When I watched Disney's Peter Pan as a kid, I was always weirded out by Smee's introduction scene. He was on screen for maybe 5 seconds and immediately 5 pirates almost killed him. One jabbed a large sword at his belly, the next one pointed a loaded gun at his face, the next one almost hanged him and pointed a dagger dangerously close to his belly, then someone almost cut his throat cutting the rope around his neck loose, and finally one keeps throwing swords at him until he is upstairs, seemingly also aimed at his belly. All that in under one minute! And all Smee does is wave some air to his belly and stick out his tongue, like it's completely normal to him.
As the movie went on, Smee's shirt was pulled up several times, and I kept expecting the pirates and even Hook to take another jab at it. That didn't happen, but the more often I watched the movie, the more his belly just seemed like a target for them. And I started thinking that the only reason Smee kept trying to convince Hook to sail out to sea was because he had nowhere else to go, and he was afraid of the men skewering his belly someday or something. Not out of loyalty.
So I wrote a short one-shot fic on how I always thought Smee's mornings were in the Disney version.
I might be weirding some of you guys out, but I just uploaded it because I know some people on YouTube and deviantART might find it interesting.
Enjoy!
It was just another dull morning: no action whatsoever, just a quiet morning.
Smee hated this kind of morning. Quiet mornings always meant a bored crew. And whenever the crew was bored, Smee's belly was always their favourite playground. It had become a game for them, but for him it was plain torment to go through almost every morning. He found it a bloody disgrace that he had to struggle to survive his own shipmates' dangerous games.
Smee had already set up the shaving materials for his captain. Hook had been extra irritable for the past few weeks, so he decided to give him a relaxing head-and-shoulder massage after his shave today.
Now here was the hard part: getting out of his small cabin and making it across the deck, trying to get past the crew without getting another sword poked at his belly. He pulled his shorts up a bit more and his shirt down, and took his tray.
This was it. He opened the door, dodged the swords that were thrown at the door and moved forward. "M-morning," he said hastily as he went, purposely avoiding the word 'good' in front of 'morning' in order not to provoke them again.
"Hey, Smee," shouted a few at him. "What be th' rush?"
He suddenly felt two strong arms tugging at his upper arms. He was lifted up from behind, unable to move away. He tried his best to balance the tray he was holding as he squirmed in the pirate's grip. He noticed that the man had grasped his shirt and pulled it up as well, fully exposing Smee's large belly. Oh no, thought Smee.
A group of pirates then surrounded him. One of them drew a large sword and smirked at him. Smee knew what was coming next. He quickly sucked in his belly as the pirate jabbed the sword at it. The crew burst out in laughter.
He hoped the large man would draw back his sword soon; it was very hard to breathe like this. But instead, the pirate slowly brought his sword even closer and closer to his belly, and Smee had to suck it in even more.
"That's right, suck in that fat gut o' yers," cheered the pirates in amusement. "Suck it in! Suck it in more!"
He could feel the point of the cold steel poking inside his belly button.
"I… can't…" he desperately brought out, feeling sweat drops rolling down his face. He couldn't keep this up much longer.
Finally, the pirate withdrew his sword, and Smee allowed his belly to shoot back forward. The crew laughed even harder at him. Smee gasped in the air he needed so badly before he struggled in the pirate's grip again. He was finally let go, and rushed towards the other end of the deck.
"Hey, we're not done yet!" called one of the men after him. He threw a lasso at Smee. The rope surrounded him and before he knew, it was tightened right below his belly. Smee still tried to get away, but the more he ran, the tighter the rope was getting. The pirate who caught him gave the rope one strong tug, and Smee shot backwards against him, dropping his tray. The pirate hoisted up his shirt from behind and lifted him off the floor again. The rope was now so tight around his hips that his belly was sticking out even more than usual. The entire crew laughed as the pirate shook him up and down like a yo-yo.
"Look at that fat jiggle!" cheered the men.
Another pirate walked up to him and the one that was holding Smee up stopped shaking him. The other pirate then drew a dagger and pointed it at his belly. "Can you suck it in now?" he asked with a wide smirk.
But Smee couldn't do it; the rope was too tight and held up all of his fat. The pirate poked his dagger against Smee's belly. Smee couldn't oppress the nervous giggle that he always made whenever he was scared. The men laughed even harder at him.
"Then let's try and get it loose, shall we?" said the pirate, the edge of his dagger now aimed at the rope under Smee's belly. Smee could feel the cold steel pressing dangerously against his lower belly, and he gulped. He was trembling so much that his belly fat kept jiggling. "Stay still if ye don't want me to cut yer chubby gut off," added the pirate, his smirk widening.
But before he could do anything, they all froze at the loud shout at the other side of the deck.
"SMEE!"
Smee was immediately dropped to the floor. His still exposed belly was sticking out even more now that he was sitting, and the crew was still sniggering and pointing at him. He immediately stood up, pulled his shirt back down (as far as it could go down) and rushed towards his captain, dragging the rope after him. He felt his belly jiggle heavily with each step. He heard more laughter behind him. "Good luck, Mr Smee!" called one of them after him.
He stood in position as soon as he was in front of his captain, who had clearly run out of patience. "Good morning, cap—" But Hook immediately dug his hook into the back his shirt and hoisted him up to his eye level.
"What took you so long?!" he yelled at him.
"I-I-I was j-just on my way here, s-sir," stammered Smee. "B-but the crew, th-they—"
"Don't give me your silly excuses, you fool!" yelled Hook. But then his eyes were aimed at his belly, and he seemed to calm down a little. "Oh?" He lowered his head, his eyes following the rope. Slowly, a grin began to form, and grew wider and wider. "Well, well… Isn't this an interesting get-up."
Smee felt his captain lay a very cold hand atop his belly, making it twitch. "C-cap'n?" he asked carefully.
Hook's hand slowly roamed around his belly as Hook muttered: "How often I've been tempted to dig my hook into this…" Smee gasped, and started to shudder. Hook then looked back up. "But I won't," he said, releasing his shirt and softly pushing Smee back with his hand still on his belly. "Loyalty such as yours to me is hard to come by around here." He dug his hook into the rope. Lightly scraping Smee's skin, he tore the rope loose. Once again, his belly shot forward in freedom.
"Now pick up that mess and give me a shave!" Hook barked at him.
Smee stumbled backwards, tripping over himself. "A-a-aye aye, sir!" As he stood back up and rushed to the steps towards the deck, he prayed to himself that the crew would just let him do his job this time.
Another dull morning, indeed.
Feel free to leave a comment. Criticisms are of course welcome, just keep it clean, please.
Do keep in mind that this is just a stupid thing I wrote in 30 minutes just for the heck of it. So you don't have to dig for deeper literary aspects or anything (lol). ;)