To Love You More
By: Difinity
Rated: PG
Category: Shounen-ai/fluff
Note: Fic includes song
Disclaimer: Difinity does NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or the song, "To Love You More" by Celine Dion
~*…*~ are song lyrics
Yami's POV
~*~
It seems silly for me to be jealous, but I am. I can't help it. If the person you loved was in a relationship with a good friend of yours, a bit of jealousy would surely be sitting in the pit of your gut, like a cold stone. Though they look so happy together, my thoughts and desires overcome my somewhat mock happiness for the couple. When the heart's desires are too far from reach, it tends to hurt deeply.
But of course, I'd never let Yugi know about it.
Why wouldn't I let him know about it?
Well, he is the one I love, to put it bluntly.
No one knows about my infatuation with my lighter half. Obviously, I try not to make it look like anything more than a brotherly affection, but as each day strolls by, it's getting harder to do so. I can't help but feel my face heat up as I feel Yugi lean against me when he's tired, or smile when he hugs me for listening to his worries. All I can do is smile and nod, supporting whatever he chooses to do in his life.
I just wish I was bold enough to tell him how I feel, even though I would surely get rejected.
Sometimes though, I can't help but think about Anzu's feelings towards Yugi. It is now commonly known among everyone that she used to have very strong feelings towards myself. But when I had told her that my heart belonged to someone else, she shrugged and said it was nothing, but I saw extreme hurt flash in her eyes. Is she being entirely truthful to Yugi? Or is she somehow using him to get to me?
I can't help but fear for my aibou's feelings. He means too much to me, and I can't bare to see him cry. I never could.
~*Take me back in the arms I love
Need me like you did before
Touch me once again
And remember when
There was no one that you wanted more*~
Apparently, according to Jounouchi-kun, there had been a time when Yugi cared about me in the same sense the I care about him now. But, Jounouchi-kun told me that my small hikari had been too shy and scared to attempt to voice out his feelings. So he tried to forget and instead settled back into his old feelings for Anzu; feelings he had nurtured since he was a child.
Once again, I feel that old prang of jealousy spark.
Sighing, I decide to exit my soul room, and I stand alone in the corridor between mine and Yugi's soul rooms. His room is so bright, so innocent. It completely contrasts with mine. Sometimes, I sense Yugi attempting to enter my room, but he retreats and decides to leave me be. He just doesn't know how I long for him to enter my room, just so I could even try to hold him in my arms.
Wishful thinking.
Sometimes, I can't help but fear that Yugi one day may decide to leave me alone in the darkness that inhabits my mind. It's a terrifying thought, but, I know he has places to be, people to meet, and a life to live. I do not wish to be responsible for holding him back.
Yet for me, just seeing his sweet smile is enough to last eternity.
With a start, I realize that Yugi is home. I hear the door slam shut from the front door, and somehow I figure that Yugi is in a bad mood. Deciding that it was best to wait for him in his room, I casually stroll over to his desk and settle on the swivel chair. Something tells me he's not angry, but upset over something.
Then again, I could be wrong.
~*Don't go you know you will break my heart
She won't love you like I will
I'm the one who'll stay
When she walks away
And you know I'll be standing here still*~
I nearly jump out of my chair when I see Yugi rush into the room. My poor aibou flung his book bag across the room and collapsed face first on his bed, burying his face into his pillow. Sure enough, there were tears staining his cheeks. He's ignoring me, but I know whatever he's so upset about, he'll eventually tell me about it.
I can't stand it. I go sit on his bed, sliding my hands onto his under arms and lifting him into my arms, pressing his cheek against my chest. He sniffs rather loudly, which causes me to smile. I wrap my arms around him, wondering who could have a cold enough heart to hurt my aibou. Feeling his arms wrap around me causes my face to flush red, a warm sensation spreading throughout the course of my body.
I like it.
~*I'll be waiting for you
Here inside my heart
I'm the one who wants to love you more
You will see I can give you
Everything you need
Let me be the one to love you more*~
I tilt Yugi's face upwards to have him look into my eyes. The amethyst eyes I love so very much were filled with tears, an unbearable sadness dwelling within them. Gently, I wipe the tears away with my thumb, watching Yugi shut his eyes. I can't help but notice how very lovely his eyelashes are. My eyes grew wide as I felt Yugi rest his head atop my shoulder, hearing him sniff slightly, tightening his hold around me.
"Yugi…what's wrong?" I ask gently, not wanting to pressure Yugi into telling me something he doesn't want to talk about.
I heard Yugi clear his throat slightly. "It's Anzu. She-" he paused. "She-She told me that, she didn't really like me. That she was just trying to get closer to you by being with me." I held back an angry growl that was about to escape my lips. How dare she try that! "She-" Yugi continued. "She got fed up and figured that you wouldn't ever love her the way she loves you, so she dumped me at school."
"Yugi," I attempt to say.
"Yami, I feel like such an idiot!" he sobbed. "Why did I even think I could forget about y-" Yugi stopped abruptly. I wondered if maybe he was talking about what Jounouchi-kun told me. Yet I didn't pressure him into telling me something he did not wish to say. Yugi pulled away from my arms and sat back into his bed. He shut his eyes, as if he was thinking hard about something. I studied him for a moment.
And you know what?
I don't think I've ever loved him more than I did at that moment.
~*See me as if you never knew
Hold me so you can't let go
Just believe in me
I will make you see
All the things that your heart needs to know*~
Yugi opens his eyes and gazes at me with something shining in his amethyst eyes. We stared into each other's eyes in silence. I felt myself grow nervous, but I didn't want Yugi to see that. Without warning, Yugi leans in and wraps his arms around me. My eyes grow wide once again, feeling my small hikari's warm embrace.
For a moment, all I wanted to do was just kiss him senseless. Kiss him until all his pain, and all his fears just vanished.
Yugi pulled away from me and touched my cheek, studying my face for a moment. Without truly thinking about what I was doing, I leaned in and kissed his cheek, closing my eyes. I was certain I felt him struggle and suddenly I realized what I was doing. Turning away I gently whispered an apology.
I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment as I turned away from him, hardly daring to believe I had been bold enough to actually kiss him. Oh but how I want to do that again.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a bright pink blush touch at my aibou's pale cheeks, his eyes wide in fascination. He's touching his cheek while staring at me; I can actually feel his eyes on me.
"Y-Yugi, I…," I stutter.
~*I'll be waiting for you
Here inside my heart
I'm the one who wants to love you more
You will see I can give you
Everything you need
Let me be the one to love you more*~
Yugi reached out and touched my shoulder, slowly pulling me down. My back is now touching the mattress as I gaze up into Yugi's amethyst eyes. I see mischief glow in them as a warm smile reaches upon his lips. I've never seen my aibou act this way before, but I like it. He lowers himself down and gently rubs his nose against mine.
An Eskimo kiss.
Not the type I was hoping for, but, you take what you can get, right?
I can feel his warm breath against my forehead, and his golden bangs are tickling my face. I smile as I shut my eyes for a moment, enjoying this tender moment. Was it really only minutes ago that he had been crying in my arms because of a broken heart?
It didn't seem that way now.
~*And some way all the love that we had can be saved
Whatever it takes we'll find a way*~
I open my eyes to meet Yugi's gaze. We both stare into each other's eyes, the silence bearing down on us.
"Yami," Yugi whispered. "Can I ask you something?"
I gulped, hardly daring to believe that I was so close to feeling my aibou's lips pressed against my own.
"What is it?" I reply, not truly trusting my voice.
"Do you love me?"
His question completely caught me off guard. I froze, my heart nearly stopping as my blood ran cold.
"Yugi, I-"
I never got to finish my sentence.
Yugi suddenly leaned back down again and pressed his lips against my own in a demanding manner. My eyes flew open in complete shock, my face all at once feeling as if it was on fire.
But I didn't hesitate to kiss him back.
I placed my hand on his head and pulled him even deeper into the kiss. I mentally chuckled as I could've sworn I felt Yugi grin into the kiss, opening his mouth slightly, just enough to deepen the kiss shyly, yet not turning it into a passionately inflamed kiss.
Finally, I felt Yugi part from the kiss hesitantly, opening his amethyst eyes, which were now glazed over. I smile at him, shutting my eyes slowly as I felt Yugi press his kiss bruised lips against my forehead.
"Let me ask you a question Yugi," I said softly.
"What is it?" Yugi murmured. I smiled to myself.
~*I'll be waiting for you
Here inside my heart
I'm the one who wants to love you more
You will see I can give you
Everything you need
Let me be the one to love you more*~
"Can I be the one to love you more?"
With that, I pulled Yugi into another kiss.
~*Owari*~