Disclaimer: Don't own skins, people.
Always
A surge of guilt surged through Emily Fitch's body.
Had she taken advantage?
She wanted to think that this was it. This was what she had been waiting for. Naomi knew that she was head over heels for her; Naomi knew she could walk away this morning as if last night had never happened and Naomi knew that Emily was very, very gay.
Because Naomi just knows everything.
Of course, if Emily's stroke of luck decided to run through this morning, Naomi's eyes would flutter open, she'd smile suggestively at Emily and they'd pick up where they had left off.
But Emily Fitch could not be that lucky. She just wasn't that person. Emily lived in Katie's shadow. Emily was the loner, Emily went unnoticed and Emily was the gay one.
Fuck Katie for getting all the luck.
Emily unwound her arms from Naomi's body. They were still on the bouncy castle. She decided not to wake her up, she looked peaceful. And anyway, she knew it wouldn't be pleasant. Naomi let her guard down last night (of course she had to be doped up to high heaven) but this morning, her heart would be closed again. Emily sprang off the bouncy castle and walked about five steps before she turned around again, got on the bouncy castle and kissed Naomi on the cheek.
If they couldn't have forever, they had last night.
--
"We'll help clean up Panda, yeah?" Katie offered in a strange fit of generosity. She looked around and observed her surroundings and immediately regretted her previous statement.
Pandora didn't respond. She sat in her arm chair, silent. She didn't want to talk. She didn't want to do anything. She wanted to be useless Pandora that Effy knew and loved but now, she was someone who fucked her best friends fuck buddy, when she loved someone else. Emily stumbled inside to be greeted by Katies stare of death.
"Well if it isn't…" Katie trailed off, racking her brains for a lesbian celebrity reference, but nothing came to mind. "My dyke of a sister." Emily gave her sister the eye roll she deserved.
"You won't be so sad when I've got this place cleaned up." Thomas said sweetly, kissing Pandora on the forehead.
"You want to explain last night?" Katie whispered, as if Emily had stolen a car or hurt someone last night.
"No." Emily replied. She knew that sometimes the more clearer something becomes; the less you can understand why.
--
"I had surf and turf with Cook last night." Pandora said randomly. Emily was the only one left in the kitchen with her, doing the dishes.
"Oh. Shit." Emily began, "What about Effy?"
"She knows. I thought that you should know too." She said timidly.
"Why?" Emily asked.
"Because,,, well, I don't know but I guess we're all in this together now." Emily wasn't quite sure what Pandora meant, but then again, who ever did?
"Does Thomas know?" She probed. Pandora shook her head. "Well, um…I think he should."
"Do you think Naomi will remember last night?" It was Effy, popping up randomly. The girls timing was impeccable.
Emily whirled around. There wasn't much she could say. "I dunno." She shrugged her shoulders.
"Well, I think she should be reminded." Effy observed in a knowing tone. "Yeah, Ems?"
"Yeah. I'm gonna go." Emily finished up and left Pandora and Effy to it. The tension in the room was almost unbearable.
"Don't worry, Panda. You weren't the only one surfing and turfing last night." Effy remarked with a mischievous smile.
--
To say the next day at college was awkward would be an understatement.
They all looked relaxed on the green, but looks were deceiving. Freddie threw glances at Effy and Cook, Cook fidgeted more than JJ because somehow, he was sitting between Pandora and Effy, Katie was inviting Effy to some party Danny and the lads were having and of course, Emily was waiting for Naomi to show her face.
She doesn't.
"Where are you going?" Katie called as Emily got up and walked away.
"Away from here." Emily called back. Psychology could wait. This however, couldn't.
"I like her idea." Cook bolted up and gave Effy a come hither look.
"You coming to class, Freddie?" Effy offered, smiling at him. Cook furrowed his eyebrows.
"Yeah, hold on." He finished his spliff, shot Cook a look of disapproval and joined Effy.
They barely knew each other and everything was already fucked up.
--
"Hi." Emily shifted when Naomi opened her door. Naomi looked at Emily in a way that made her nervous.
Coming here was a bad idea.
"Hey." The greeting was nor cold or warm. She was impossible to read, as usual.
"I…" she was about to say she was sorry for Saturday night, but that would have been a lie. And Emily decided she wasn't going to lie anymore, about anything. She had to say something that wouldn't result in Naomi slamming the door in her face. "It was just the drugs, right?" She giggled. Naomi gave in a giggled. Her expression loosened up a bit and her lips curled into a half smile.
"I think we need to talk." She commented knowingly, gesturing Emily to come in.
--
They sat on opposite ends of her bed.
"Why didn't you come to college?" Emily inquired.
"I was sick." Naomi said sarcastically. "Cough, cough." She added. Silence settled between them.
"The party was a mistake." Naomi said, breaking the silence.
"A complete mistake." Emily agreed, nodding her head. Although she didn't agree and she could actually feel her heart break.
"I mean…I don't care if your gay…" Naomi rambled on. She certainly didn't mind. Emily thought bitterly. "And it was a mistake but," Naomi continued, clearly seeing Emily saddened, "it was a fun mistake."
Shit. Naomi thought. Nice move.
"Ems? Emily?" She probed.
"Uh huh." Emily mumbled. "Look, Naomi, it was one night. Christ, I'm not fucking proposing here."
"What are you doing here, Emily?" Naomi's eyes searched Emily's for answers. Clarity was all she was asking for. For some people, not knowing is a good feeling. But for Naomi Campbell, the worst thing was not knowing. She had never felt so distorted in her life.
Emily knew exactly why she was here. She was here because she liked Naomi and her front. She was here because at the end of the day, it was Naomis voice she wanted to hear.
"We're still friends, right?" She asked. Truth be told, they never were friends. They didn't know what their relationship was, but it would be much more than anyone anticipated.
"Yeah. We are." Unsure of what to do next, Naomi hugged Emily.
Naomi had no clarity whatsoever. For once though, Emily did.
She knew they'd always be "friends."
She knew they'd always make the same "mistake" they made nights before.
And she knew whoever Cook, JJ, Freddie, Effy, Pandora and Katie fell for or fucked next, she'd always love Naomi.
(What she didn't know was, Naomi would always love her too.) But of course, she wasn't going to admit that.
--
A/N: I hope you enjoyed! I love reviews. (: