A/N: Don't own anyone but any OC's...
I'm going to apologize ahead of time if I make any mistakes with military concepts and/or vocabulary. I did do some research but like writing, it's a constant work in progress. That being said, I anticipate some people to NOT like some of the plot ideas that I will have. The way I see it is: Everyone's been gone, there is no contact and 85% of the population is DEAD. The crew of the Nathan James will have to come to terms with the fact family and friends are gone since the last contact with anyone. Alex serves two purposes: Continue in the fight to find a cure and vaccine and as someone for Chandler to gravitate to. After seeing Phase Six, I realized the man needs someone who can challenge him; be his match. I have no regrets as many of you who follow me know this by now. I mean in something like this, USAMRIID would be involved.
Long story short: During a disaster where all normalcy as it was known is gone and a new reality emerges, people will forge new relationships as we, the human species, are social creatures and need emotional and physical connections. Not only is it a social need but a survival need.
Somewhere Mid-Atlantic
"How long has she been out there?"
Commander Mike Slattery craned his neck as his superior, Commander Tom Chandler, CO of the USS Nathan James approached. The steely stare fixated on the lone figure standing casually on the deck.
The early morning mists shrouded her in ribbons of fine pearl as the ship cut through the opaque curtain. From the bridge, it was apparent her hands were occupied; probably coffee as it had been immediately established the Major thrived on the black tar as Mike had designated it.
"Since about day break. She came here, said good morning, then headed straight outside. She doesn't exactly look like she's been sleeping. Been the doing this for about a week." Mike's brow furrowed and nose crinkled. Temperature had to be at least 20 degrees if not colder and she was out there unfazed by the bitter air. He couldn't stand being outside for five minutes when they had been in the Arctic.
"She say anything else?" Chandler was reaching for his coat.
"You mean like spilling her feelings? Commander, this is Major Koch we are talking about right? She hasn't exactly been warm and fuzzy in the feeling department. I think she's said more to Admiral Halsey than you or I."
"Yeah, I suppose you're right," he snorted with a light chuckle masked underneath. "But the last thing we need is her freezing to death or worse."
The pair exchanged a knowing glance before Chandler started for the door.
Upon pushing the watertight door open, his face was blasted with an icy greeting. He swore she was part Inuit as he sure as hell didn't want to be out there any longer than needed. Yet, she had not budged or indicated any level of discomfort.
"Major Koch," the Commander hollered upon his approach. The slender shoulders that were protected in a the thick parka shifted down then up before the upper then lower torso circled around. The hood shielded cutting sapphires that trailed his path towards her. Several strands of chocolate silk peeked from around her neck and along the fur trimming. Thinsulate gloves hugged her hands and fingers though the heat from her "black tar" as Mike had declared it transferred through the ceramic and materiel, shielding the palms from the biting cold.
"Captain," she warmly greeted with a matching smile. "Beautiful morning."
"I wouldn't call 20 degrees beautiful ma'am. Commander Slattery says you've been at this routine for a week. Something going on you'd like to share?"
Major Koch took a drink, letting the delicious blend trickle down her throat. Honestly, Mike just didn't know good coffee when he smelled it. The watered down shit he claimed was coffee was water and nothing more. She was Army and Army people thrived on extra strength caffeine.
Chandler waited until she finished off the remaining bit of her drink. He was able to catch a clearer glimpse of those piercing rings. They were lackluster and distant. Anytime he had seen her they were vibrant and always observant. Something was eating at her.
"There is no need to burden you with my problems, Captain. You have enough to sort through without taking on anything else. My problems are my problems alone."
"That's bullshit, Major."
The Major pursed her lips and looked out across the horizon. She and Rachel had worked 12 hours shifts since her arrival from Guantanamo Bay; both equally determined to develop a cure or at the very least a vaccine for what Koch nicknamed the "Ramses" strain; named after the first well known victim of smallpox, Ramses V.
"I know you're still pissed at me but I was going to tell you everything." Her eyes watered as she bit hard on her bottom lip. "Tell me you understand why I did it. Please..."
Chandler exhaled then closed the distance between them. Pissed, yes he was as Rachel had been silent about what was going on during the initial four month "mission" they had been assigned to in the Arctic. Studying arctic terns his ass. Silent about the fact the "Ramses" strain was quickly rising as a world health crisis in which 85% of the population of the human race was erased off the face of the Earth with thousands more falling ill with every passing day. Then came that day in Cuba.
And everything changed.
No one could've imagined a microbiologist/immunologist, let alone one from the United States Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases or USAMRIID, was alive and well living with a rag tag group in the jungles surrounding the former American base dodging and taking pot shots at Al Qaeda prisoners. Yet, Major Alexandra "Alex" Koch was standing mere feet from him on the deck of the last hope for humanity holding a casual conversation.
"Yeah, I was angry but I can see why now. You were acting in a manner appropriate given the circumstances. Perhaps I was too harsh."
"I-I didn't know who I could trust. The Russians are still out there and they know about me thanks to what Quincy did. They won't stop until they have everything including Rachel, and myself. I'll die before I give those assholes anything. I'll burn my research, notes, computer; everything and anything that would empower those sons of bitches."
I know everything about you, about Major Koch, Dr. Scott, and your mission...You won't win
"Tell us how you really feel about them?" Another rare smile crossed his lips. This time, she lifted her chin and met his eyes. A few peeks of light cracked the listless pair.
"I think you got an idea already. I loathed them when I was active duty and I loathe them even more so now." A thin puff of air swirled around her lips and nose which had turned rosy. "I suppose play time is over. Besides, you look like you need to thaw your ass out."
With empty mug in one hand, she started back, feeling the weight of his eyes following her. The heavy footfalls fell in cadence with her light tread; strange how that happened. She paused then turned her attention upward, flashing a brief wave up to Mike who was vigilant on the bridge.
"Oh and one more thing," Chandler nearly walked into his shorter companion as they reached the first door. "Sorry about grabbing the radio from you and pissing the Russians off. But that son of a bitch really grated on my nerves and I don't regret what I did."
"I know you don't but don't ever do that again." The seriousness in his tone sent a shiver down her spine but it wasn't a shiver of fear.
"Understood," she nodded and took a few more steps only to be halted by his hand cuffed around her bicep. Guilt underlay the stern look.
"Was it because I was angry?" The Captain's voice dropped as though there were others nearby. But there wasn't.
His question took her aback. Alex felt his hand release her and she hugged herself hard, then slowly nodded her head.
"Yeah," she shut her eyes pressing a lone tear out. "For the last, however long it's been, I've been so hard and cold. Any sensation or feeling I suppressed. Survival was what mattered. The only person who saw anything that resembled emotion from me was Tex. Then your team arrived and for the first time since the world collapsed we felt...I felt hope. Knowing we stood a chance to fight this sparked life in me. Some of the crew have come to me, asking if it's true. I want to tell them it is but what if what we saw was a fluke? What if no one responds like I did?"
Alex shifted and leaned her left side against the wall. Mentally she was grateful for the thermal underwear under the cargo pants.
"You can't think that way Major. If you did you wouldn't be pushing yourself like you have been."
Before she could respond he shot a finger up. "Still speaking Major."
Her hands shot up in surrender.
"As much as a pain in the ass as you have been from time to time, you and Dr. Scott have the gratitude and sincere thank you of everyone on board. We couldn't have survived the outbreak without you. Everything is uncertain now. It's uncharted waters from here. "
"Well thank you, Commander but it's all uncharted waters for everyone. But, I do have to say you sparked some of that life back in me; the dedication you see was you snapping me back. I should be thanking you." There, she said it. Alex felt the burden being thrown off her chest. Chandler was clearly surprised as the shock was written across his face. Her heart was hammering violently against her ribs. Adrenaline was saturating her nerves, igniting a light trembling that even her clothing couldn't conceal. "Oh shit, I said something wrong."
"No, no you didn't," he gripped the handle and turned it right hearing it groan then yield. "But let's continue this inside."
Both continued further into the ship, away from the main flurry of activity and personnel that kept the James running. Alex didn't realize how numb her face had become until the sharp stinging slapped her face and ears. Being a part of the action had acclimated her to the ways of getting around small spaces that accompanied a naval destroyer. Luckily, her slender frame provided access of ease in tight corridors, narrow hatches and doors where she had laughed behind Mike's back when he lumbered through the same areas. A little humor didn't hurt and he had snickered after she smacked her head on the top of one of the doors not too long ago. Well, that was after she was cleared from the ship's doc then he laughed.
Her thoughts ceased once Chandler stopped in front of the door to his cabin.
"Here?" She anxiously scanned both ways of the corridor, looking for anyone that may happen upon them.
"No one will barge in," he stated in a matter of fact tone. "And honestly if anyone sees you come or go they won't question."
"Except for Mike," Alex stepped in and closed the door behind her.
"I can assure you, he won't say anything."
"That's right. I think he and Rachel have been rather chummy," Alex grinned from ear to ear. Finally, there was that brilliant smile. He watched her relax and slip the heavy parka off, draping it over the chair. Her comfortable attire of black long sleeved shirt and tan utility pants showed the toned frame she worked hard to maintain. Her army issued uniform had been lost after the crash. The chain peeked around the back of her neck, keeping the dog and toe tag close to her heart. And to complete it, her military ID lightly bumped on her right hip.
The air thickened with the passing moments until it turned unbearable.
They rushed in until their bodies crashed into one another. Her face buried into his chest, smothering her senses with the aftershave he used. How easy it would be to fall asleep right then and there. The strong arms clad protectively around her, the same arms that had held a high powered rifle at her heart upon first meeting. The scent of the standard shampoo tickled his senses despite the industrial tint. One hand carded through her hair as the other rested in the center of her back.
Damn it felt good just standing there, clinging to one another. She slowly pushed back, cupping her hand across the back of his neck. It was cool to the touch, on account of his time spent on deck. He didn't resist the urgent pressure, yielding until their mouths were locked together. Her lips were silk compared to his lightly chapped ones but she didn't care. His hands could be ice but so long as she could hold them she was content.
"No more secrets," he regrettably pulled back but tenderly gripped the sides of her face with his hands. The pained expression ringed his handsome features. "No more. After what you pulled-"
"No; no you're right. Honestly I didn't intend to ignite any panic but I had to do it. I had to see if it worked," she had to make this right; make it right with him. "Everything is on the table. Everything about the Ramses strain, what my work is," Alex stopped. Fear was creeping up but where could she run? She was on a naval destroyer out in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.
No more secrets.
Determination gathered like a summer storm.
"How I feel...feel about you." Her voice stuttered and trailed as her courage fled.
No taking it back now. She would have to live with the repercussions good or bad. And based on the blank stare she was receiving, it was appearing to be pointing towards the latter. Chandler simply blinked with no indication of reaction. Neither one had been prepared for this. Hell, they weren't sure what it was they had but were sure of one thing: The feelings were genuine, not based on hollow physical needs as some of her past relationships had been built around.
"You're not talking," Alex felt like a fool. Her ears burned and didn't have to be told the flush hue fanning across her cheeks and neck. "And I just shoved my boot in my mouth. Shit. Shit."
The sudden jerking and pulling in his embrace snapped Chandler from his trance. Alex continued struggling to get free, desperate to run away from this; from him. Instinctively his arms fastened around her waist, holding fast against her surprising strength. His legs braced then pushed into the tile, anchoring both in place.
"What are you doing?" A little tighter his hold became.
"Doing what I do best! Fucking up!" The tops of her knuckles slammed his hip but Chandler was undeterred. "Just let me go."
"No. Who said anything about you fucking up?" The battle waned but he sensed her body remained tense, prepared to take off in flight. She was beginning to fatigue.
"You're not saying anything that's what." Alex gave one final push of energy before letting reality set in: Chandler was stronger and he was keeping her there.
"Because I haven't had a chance to Alex that's why. Now stop fighting me." Chandler slackened his hold enough for her to turn around. Her eyes were bleary with pencil thin trails of crimson crossing the whites. "First, you haven't done or said anything wrong. It's just..."
"Just what? Remember, no more secrets?"
Chandler stepped back until the backs of his legs bumped the edge of metal frame. The heat of his palms caressed her cheeks as he fought to find the right words. He watched as her smaller ones covered his.
"It's just after everything that's happened: The pandemic, the secrecy..."
"You're unsure; I get it. When we first met at Guantanamo, you had a gun pointed at me because you thought I was a terrorist. Not the best way to start off I know. Then news from home. Then-"
"I'm not."
"Then what's wrong? Look if you want to-" Alex began but was silenced with the plea of his mouth upon hers. A subtle moan passed her lips and spread along his. Her legs were turning weak, threatening to buckle when the slick warmth of his tongue pleaded to be let in. She happily obliged, parting her lips and shivering at the sensation of it sliding along hers, taking in the sweet sensation igniting in her nerves. Her toes curled in the boots and gooseflesh pebbled her skin.
"No," He severed the burning connection. His hot breath danced across her face and neck. He shut his eyes and pressed his forehead lightly to hers. "I can't. I won't. I've already lost so much."
He leaned in again, catching her lips with his, this time with a passion that he didn't know existed; or had been denying. It didn't matter now. Alex felt as though her very soul was being swept away, claimed with one simple act. She pushed, he pulled, giving and taking until they stumbled then collapsed to the berth behind them. Their mouths never severed, carrying on in their intimate dance, quickly racing into an urgent fervor as they battled the other for control.
"Not angry at me anymore I see," she pulled back, panting hard between her words. The sly grin playing over her lips. Chandler was breathing hard but absently shook his head, consumed by the storm of lust that had swept over him. The soft tip of tongue darted over his lips before diving in and attacking the light tan neck. Her hand reached out, stroking the back of his neck, encouraging him on as soft kisses and nips trailed down just above her collarbone. A hitched breath was music to his ears, telling him he was doing something right. The sudden sharp grip on his light gray blonde locks caused him to hiss and pause.
"Sorry," Alex groaned and rolled her hips across his. The iron hold slackened to a tender carding across the scalp. How long had it been? Christ, too long for either apparently as the tell tale bulge dug into her right hip. He felt her back arching up, pressing their lower bodies deeper together, rubbing the thin cotton layer against him. Their bodies shook with adrenaline as hands groped and massaged, driving them closer to their breaking points. Chandler fisted the hem of her shirt, tugging it upward in short needy jerks. Her torso was smooth with a few moles dotting the pale surface.
"Beautiful," he breathed into her bellybutton.
"Oh my god," his calloused fingers turned to silk, fanning over the sensitive flesh. "Tom..."
Alex struggled with her boots, growling in irritation. "Goddamn boots!" It would be boots that stood between them and sating the hunger withing.
"Wait," she propped up on her elbows to see the boots falling off and landing with a equal dull thuds. Before returning to her, Chandler toed his off, relieved at the alleviation.
"Better," he exhaled. Before returning, he unfastened the uniform top, draping it over the chair. Alex playfully rolled her eyes at his display. "Get over here," she crooked a finger. "That's an order." The straight face cracked. She started to sit up only to have him guide her back down. The mattress shifted under their weight but it was surprisingly comfortable given his cabin wasn't the Ritz.
"Tom, are you sure?" Her conscious breached the surface. He lifted his head and attacked her neck with his hands unfastening the brass buttons and zipper.
"Positive," he purred in her ear. "I've moved on, I know what I want, and I know who I want." He lifted up, peeling away the cobalt colored shirt. Despite being on the water for over a year, his body was still a sight in its own. The bars rippling down before vanishing under the hem of the navy issued pants.
"You're out of uniform," she teased.
"You're not," he tugged the cargo pants down until they were pooled at the foot of the bunk. He hurriedly discarded his pants, leaving the black boxers on. He dove in, devouring her mouth with urgency. He wanted to feel nothing between them. The tension had been simmering, slowly rising until they couldn't deny it any longer.
Her legs hooked around his waist, keeping him flush to her body. She wanted to feel him, all of him.
"Wait," she snapped her head back. "Is there...Do you..."
He knew what she was indicating. Damn it! They couldn't...
"No," and there went the moment. "Shit." He shook his head in partial disappointment.
"Hey," Alex cupped his face. "It's alright." She sighed but he knew she was as equally dismayed.
"Damn," he cursed with frustration. After losing his family and feeling lost inside, his heart was thrown into keeping the men and women on the James safe. Now he found himself letting another in and someone letting him in.
"Hey," feathery caresses fanned across his cheek and neck. Concern tainted the sparkling sapphires. "You okay?"
"Yeah," he collected the wandering hand, pressing a sweet kiss in the center of the palm. "Just thinking that's all."
"Really? Please do tell."
Chandler positioned himself behind her, allowing Alex to roll around until she was facing him. She nuzzled into his neck, placing a light kiss against the cool skin. He kissed her forehead and basked in her presence. It was then it hit him: He had fallen for her.
"I was hanging on to what remained of the old world when what and who I needed now has been right in front of me."
Alex was lost for words.
He just nodded and stole a kiss from her. Instead of words, he hoped this would express what he wanted to say. It was soft and tender, lingering across her lips even as he slowly pulled back. He brought her closer until their bodies were flush with one another.
"You think we'll find a home?"
"I don't know Lex," he used his nickname for her which he used when they were alone. "Everywhere we've tried it's been in vain."
"They won't stop until they get us." She shivered in fear. "Can't let them win Tom."
"We won't," he kissed the top of her head. "I won't let them get you or Rachel."
"She isn't a bad person. I worked with her and she's damn good at what she does. Yes she can be a bit of stiff ass Brit but that's part of her charm I can assure you."
"I'll take your word for it Lex." He sensed her beginning to relax against him with deep steady breaths; finally, she was falling asleep. He had been inwardly anxious over her insomniac like behavior as of recently. Some days she was walking in a half sleep or when she did stay in his cabin, he would awaken late in the night to find her pacing or reading something off the shelf. The Doc attempted to get her to take the sleep aid he suggested but she would only proverbially slap his hand and tell him to save it for someone who needed it more than her.
Sorry, I can't sleep. I didn't want to wake you up.
On those nights he would remain awake, holding her, praying she would sleep.
Then there were the night terrors.
The first one had been debilitating.
After the initial encounter with the Russians was when it occurred. She wouldn't talk about them; claiming they eluded her after she awakened. He didn't dare pry as she would shut down. Instead, he resigned to keeping her close, letting the latest chapter of her internal Hell play out as he looked on, helpless to do anything. When she came to, he would be there with either a hand running soothingly over her back or through her tousled hair. Words of comfort were all he could give. Sometimes her eyes would be watery or bloodshot as though she had been crying. Another time her body was trembling.
Rachel had caught wind of her colleague's suffering and offered to step up.
Alex, I can do it. You're tired and stressed. You need to rest. I don't think I've seen you rest once since your arrival!
NO! I can't let you carry the burden Rachel! I'll take more breaks or go straight to quarters after my rounds. It's not fair to you to pick up the slack because I have a few stupid nightmares.
The argument ended there.
"Commander!" Lieutenant Granderson hollered from the far right of the bridge. Mike hurried over to where the lieutenant was, following the finger that was pointed out to the south. He quickly retrieved the binoculars, allowing his sight to get a better view of the approaching vessel.
His heart pounded as he instantly knew what they were seeing.
"Get the Captain now!" Mike sounded the alarm as the crew rushed around him, manning their battle stations. Men rushed outside with their high powered weapons as the five inch deck gun was readied. Master Chief was barking orders over the comm, preparing the crew for the battle that lay ahead.
Chandler awakened to the sound of the comm blaring overhead and jumped to the floor.
"Mike," he grabbed the phone. "What the Hell is going on?"
"It's the Russians. They somehow found us."
"Shit," he cursed with venom. "I'm on my way."
"No, we're on our way," Alex was sitting upright pulling up the cargo pants and reaching for her boots.
Mike saw the burning hatred in Alex's eyes as she approached. Chandler was in battle mode, focused on what was less than 10 nautical miles away.
"Those fuckers don't give up." She looked to Mike who offered a sympathetic look. "How did they find us!? We did everything to shake them."
"I don't know how Alex but they did."
"Ahoy, Captain Chandler."
The nasal Russian accent contaminated the airwaves. Alex bristled with fists balled tightly at her hips.
"Did you think you could vanish? Aw, such arrogance that is typical with you Americans."
"Man I hate this guy," Mike muttered beneath his breath. "He doesn't shut up."
"He never knew when to that's the problem," Alex shook her head. Her attention was on Chandler whose jaw was clenched tight. He was pissed.
"I know Major Koch and Dr. Scott are there. Your ploy in Brazil, I must confess, was well played. Congratulations on your deception. But the time for games has past."
"This is Commander Chandler," Tom finally spoke.
"Ah Commander Chandler. I was beginning to wonder about you. Now, please do hand over the Major and doctor and research. We will sink you."
"Again, we will NOT turn over Dr. Scott, Major Koch, or the research." He looked to Lieutenant Granderson and nodded. "Get the guns ready."
"Sir," the young officer barked his orders. Comms Officer Mason quickly relayed the latest command to the decks below. Alex watched as they readied for retaliation. Lieutenant Foster monitored the radar, tracking their enemy's movements. The clicking of keys and chorus of voices and relaying of information drowned out into the background. It was a hand that fell firmly on her shoulder that pulled Alex back.
"You don't look so good Major," CMC Jeter had caught the panic stricken expression.
"Understatement Master Chief," Alex whispered hoarsely. "I feel goddamn sick." She shook her head as if it would abolish the churning in her stomach. "But I'm not leaving."
He knew what that really meant.
Not leaving the Captain
"Understood; but if you need to-" A hand shot up to ear level.
"I know Master Chief. But I won't let nerves do me in. I faced down Level 4 agents on a daily basis with only a suit and hose that stood between Ebola, Marburg, HIV, smallpox, and me. I won't let the Russians scare me."
"Alright then," he patted her shoulder then leaned in so no one else could hear, "I can see why he feels the way he does."
"If I can be of assistance Master Chief," Alex covered.
"You have one hour to decide Captain or else we will take what we want by force and sink your ship."
"Son of a bitch," Chandler turned to see Alex standing alongside him. "He's so full of himself."
Chandler snorted lightly as he pressed the button.
"We have your answer and it's NO."
A few tense moments passed before they heard the grating voice respond.
"I am SO disappointed in you Captain. I thought we could resolve this in a civilized manner. Your choice of action has left us no other option."
"I hope you have something up that sleeve of yours Major." Chandler looked coolly towards her.
"I may have something," she flashed a brief tiny smile. "I didn't read The Art of War for nothing. Always know thy enemy Captain."
He watched her rush from the bridge, knowing she was racing towards the lab. Whatever she was thinking he prayed worked as prayers were all they had left.