DISC: I DO NOT own any of the characters from LOK. They belong to Brike. I do however own the idea for this story.
Enjoy!
"Two Difficult Words"
Senna sighed as pain ripped through her stomach. She had just finished taking care of a little girl with a broken wrist. As she put the water back in the basin, she swallowed hard. The young water tribe woman had been fighting nausea and abdominal pain all day. She wanted to believe it was just a twenty-four-hour bug, but something deep down told her she was wrong. Putting the basin back on the shelf, she went in search of Katara. She found her mentor and mother figure in the main healing hut, going over some paper work.
"Katara?" Senna walked into the room.
"Yes," Katara glanced up. She furrowed her eyebrows in concern when she saw Senna's slight pale complexion and the way she was standing. "Senna, what's wrong?"
"I'm really sorry to do this to you, but I need to go home. I'm really not feeling well."
Katara stood and walked over to where Senna was standing. She placed the back of her hand to the younger woman's forehead and frowned.
"You're warm, but not too warm," she concluded. "What's going on?"
Senna sat upon a cot as she explained how she was feeling.
"I felt dizzy this morning and I just threw up fifteen minutes ago. My stomach's also hurting," she revealed.
"Do you mind if I check you?" Katara asked.
"Of course not," Senna lay down and waited for her former waterbending master to examine her. "I've never felt this way before. I've gotten sick every once in a while, but it's never lasted this long."
"How long have you been feeling like this?" Katara asked.
"Two weeks," Senna revealed.
Katara frowned.
"Honey, why didn't you come to me sooner?"
Senna sighed.
"I thought it was just a bug," she confessed just as Katara hit a sensitive area. "Ow!"
"I'm sorry. Is that where it's hurting?" Katara inquired.
"Yes," Senna replied.
Katara nodded. She gently continued her examination. She stopped a few minutes later and faced her former student. She smiled as she delivered the news to her.
"Senna, I have good news for you."
"What?" Senna asked. She felt her heart skip a beat at Katara's words. She had a feeling she knew what she was going to tell her. A part of her was overjoyed, but another part was terrified to the core of her being at the prospect.
"You're pregnant," Katara announced.
Senna just stared at her as the news sunk in. She always knew she would be a good mother. Her mother had been amazing. But a small part of her wasn't so sure. She never wanted to be like the man her mother had been arranged to marry. She wanted to break the cycle of abuse. And as she sat there trying to quell the panic rising in her chest, Senna was determined to do so, no matter what it took.
"I'm going to break the cycle," she said aloud.
Katara nodded. She knew what the young woman was talking about without having to ask.
"I have no doubt that you will," she encouraged. She put a hand on Senna's shoulder and squeezed it gently. She frowned when she felt Senna start to shake. Glancing down, she could see tears streaming down her face. "Honey, what's wrong?"
"I don't know how I'm going to tell Tonraq," Senna whispered as more tears flowed. She let out a fearful sob as the tears continued. "How am I going to tell him? It's not that easy. This is big and…I don't know if I can do it."
"Tonraq loves you," Katara assured her. "He has never laid a harmful hand on you in the whole five years you've known one another. You trust him, right?"
"Yes," Senna said automatically. And despite her fear, she knew deep down in her heart she truly did trust him.
"Trust that," Katara encouraged. She embraced Senna and ran a hand through her hair as the young woman she viewed as her second daughter cried out her fear and uncertainty. "Have I ever lied to you?"
"No," Senna whispered.
"And I never will. You can do this, sweetie. I know you can. I love you."
"I love you too," Senna lifted her head from Katara's chest and wiped at her eyes. "Is it okay if I go home?"
"Of course," Katara said.
"Thank you for everything," Senna stood and exited the hut.
"You're welcome," Katara replied as she watched her former student leave.
******
After walking around for an hour, Senna resigned to the fact of going home. She knew she couldn't avoid telling Tonraq her news forever. She just prayed Katara was right.
Entering the house, she made her voice as steady as possible as she called out, "Tonraq, I'm home! Are you here?"
"In the kitchen," her husband called back.
Senna made her way to him, trying to calm her quickly beating heart during the short walk. Taking a deep breath, she entered the room and sent a silent prayer up to the spirits that everything went okay.
"Hey," she greeted. She allowed Tonraq to pull her in for a hug and kissed him passionately, even though she could feel herself starting to shake.
"Senna, what's wrong?" His voice was full of concern. "Honey, you're shaking."
"I wasn't feeling well so Katara let me come home early," Senna replied. At least she wasn't lying.
"Is that all?" Tonraq asked. He kissed the top of her head as he ran a hand through her hair.
"No," Senna admitted, "but I really don't want to talk about it right now."
"Okay," her husband replied. He knew her well enough to know she would come to him when she was ready. Pulling away from his wife, he locked eyes with her. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"
Senna nodded. She blinked back more tears as their eyes locked. She hated keeping the news from him, but she couldn't bring herself to tell him just yet.
"Yes," she replied. She took a deep breath and managed to blink away the tears. With that, she went to start dinner. All the while wondering when she would be ready to tell him her news…
*****
Four months went by until Senna finally gained the courage to speak up. She was just getting ready to go home when Katara poked her head into the room where Senna had been working.
"Senna, can I talk to you before you leave?" the waterbending master requested.
"Of course," she replied. She finished putting her supplies away before entering the main healing hut. "What's up?" She approached her mentor and mother figure.
"Have you told Tonraq yet?" Katara asked.
Senna sighed.
"No," she admitted. She stared at the ground before gaining the courage to lock eyes with Katara.
"Why? Why are you keeping this a secret from him?" Katara gently ,but firmly asked.
Senna shook her head as tears welled up.
"I'm scared," she whispered.
"I know. Tonraq will understand. Please talk to him soon."
"Okay. I promise," Senna said earnestly. She left shortly afterwards.
*****
Later that night, Senna and Tonraq were lying in bed, spending some time together when Katara's words started ringing in Senna's ears. She knew her mentor was right. She had to tell him. Taking a deep breath, she sat up from her position on Tonraq's chest and steeled herself to let him in on the biggest secret besides her past.
"Senna?" Tonraq sat up and reached out a hand to her, "are you okay?"
Senna shook her head.
"No. I have to tell you something," she started. She could feel a lump forming in her throat as tears stung her eyes. She forced them back for a little longer.
"What is it?" her husband gazed at her in concern.
Senna turned away as the tears came.
"Senna, honey…" Tonraq reached a hand out and put it on his wife's shoulder. He frowned as he felt how badly she was shaking. "What's gotten you so scared?"
Senna let out a quiet sob as she gathered the courage to tell him what was going on. She tried to relax as she felt Tonraq pull her in for a hug. She let him comfort her as she continued to cry. Calming down a few minutes later, she took another deep breath. It was now or never. And Senna knew never wasn't an option. She was about to say something when her stomach started to churn. She jerked out of her husband's embrace, jumped up and ran for the bathroom. Rinsing her mouth out five minutes later, she returned to Tonraq's side. "Sorry," she apologized.
"Don't apologize," Tonraq said gently. "Are you okay?"
"No. But I will be," she assured him. "This is really hard for me to say. And before you ask, we're fine. It has to do with us, but you and I are okay."
"Okay," he replied.
"Tonraq, I…I…I'm pregnant," she said the last part barely above a whisper.
"What?" he asked.
Senna sighed as she tried to stop crying.
"Please don't make me say it again. It was hard enough saying it once. Unless you really didn't hear me the first time."
"I honestly didn't," Tonraq informed her.
Heaving a sigh, Senna locked eyes with her husband as she prepared to repeat her news.
"I'm pregnant," she said a little louder than before. This time, she could tell Tonraq had heard her.
"You are?" he asked.
Senna nodded. She turned away as her breathing started to quicken and a new set of tears fell. She braced herself for the yelling at least. But to her surprise, it never came. Instead, she felt Tonraq pull her into his arms before he kissed her on the right cheek.
"I'm so sorry!" she sobbed into his chest. "I should have told you when I first found out, but I…I couldn't."
"Why?" Tonraq genuinely wanted to know.
"I was scared about how you would react. I was scared of being a mother. I was just scared…" Senna's voice trailed off as another sob escaped her lips.
"Senna, shh, shh, it's okay, its going to be okay. I'm here for you. I love you. I'll help you in any way I can," he tenderly kissed his wife on her other cheek as he continued to stroke her hair. "You never have to be afraid of me. I understand why you were afraid to tell me and you don't have to apologize. Just know you can tell me anything."
"Okay," Senna whispered. She was starting to calm down even though she was still crying a little. "So you're not…you're not mad?"
"Not at all," Tonraq assured her.
Senna sighed with relief. As her eyes started to close, she snuggled into her husband's loving embrace as most of her earlier fears faded.
"I love you,, honey," Tonraq said as he held her close.
"I love you too," Senna said softly right before she drifted off to sleep. As she let her body and mind rest, she realized how safe she felt. And no matter what the future held, she knew she wouldn't be facing it alone. And that's all that mattered at the moment.
THE END