Keeping Up Appearances

Disclaimer: I do not own Alice Academy (Gakuen Alice) or its characters. I just truly believe that Ruka needs a backbone that the manga failed to achieve for me. Yeah, I lost all hope that Mikan will end up with Ruka, and that Natsume and Mikan are a cute couple, but seriously, Ruka's whole "smile and give up" shit didn't sit with me so…

Alice Academy… Start of third year of high school…

"Ruka-pyon~! Ruka-pyon wait for meeeee!"

That voice… That sweet and bright music… My siren is calling me… Calling me to another day of hell.

"Ruka-pyon~!" A light, familiar weight fell across my back and those soft arms wrapped around me. I took a slow, deep breath, inhaling her appealing scent, enjoying the few minutes of that gentle warmth.

"Ruka-pyon~ Didn't you hear me calling you?" I turned around as her arms slipped away from me, to see that cute little pout, those sparkling eyes slightly narrowed in annoyance. I dug my hands deep into my pockets as usual to avoid the normal temptation.

I smiled down at her, my special smile just for this special girl, "I'm sure the deaf heard you calling me Sakura."

That adorable face had gone scrunched and puffy. Oops, she's annoyed.

"Oi, baka, don't just run off on your own." Oh yeah… That other voice. My smile changed, I can feel that veil falling over my face as I glanced at him through my bangs.

"Natsume~! You're both so meeeeeeaaaaaaaan to meeeeeeeeeee!" She threw herself at him, that pout back on her face and those small fists banging against his chest. It didn't hurt. I know because there's that small smile on his face. After 7 years, I'm still slightly shocked at that. Of course, not a lot people see that so it's understandable but still.

"Oi, Ruka." I blinked and turned towards those crimson eyes, "Natsume." He stared at me. Those eyes were always showing doubt and worry since that day, a day I wish I could erase and rewrite.

I smiled back at him, "Hai? Something the matter?" He averted his eyes, like he always does, "No... Let's go." His girlfriend laughed and clung to his arm as they walked to class together. I walked behind them watching with a grin pasted to my face. The same pattern every day, for 7 years straight. Nothing much has changed really. Yeah. I tell myself that every single day. Maybe someday, I might actually believe it. But for now, it's all about keeping up appearances.

"Ne, Ruka-pyon~! I heard from Perm that she heard from a senpai's friend's sister that you broke up with Hikari-san last night! Is that true?" Sakura and Natsume both turned back to look at me as I pondered how to answer that question; Sakura had a sad worried look on her face, while Natsume's tell-tale emotionless look translated to his worry for me as well.

I laughed for their benefit, "News really does travel fast doesn't it. Your sources never cease to amaze me Sakura," I shook my head and shrugged, "It wasn't working out between us. She wanted more from me than what I was willing to give her. That's all there was to it."

"Ruka-pyon~! Not again!" I couldn't stand that disappointed look from her. Not from her.

"Gomen, Sakura, I just couldn't return her feelings the way she wanted me to." I gave a half-hearted laugh and attempted to smile against her frown.

"But-!" Natsume's hand slipped around her head to cover her mouth, "That's enough Polka. That's Ruka's business, not yours." She glared up at him and noisily struggled to remove his hand. I hid my eyes behind my hair. Worse than Sakura's disappoint was Natsume's reaction. I clenched my fists. I didn't want his understanding. I didn't want his pity.

BAKA! BAKA! BAKA!

"You're too noisy this early in the morning baka." Ah, that cold voice and baka gun can only belong to:

"Imai." She glanced towards me, "Nogi." Imai turned her back and held up a fan of photos, "1000 rabbits each for these photos from the events of last night." And with that she sped off on her ducky mobile.

"Ah~ Hotaruuuuuu!!! Let me see them!" I flinched and flashed a grin at the couple, "See you in class!" Running after Imai like this is getting very old, but today at least I was grateful. It gave me that chance to get away from those two.

I risked a glance back and saw Natsume holding Sakura back, laughing as she yelled and abused him.

Tch…Your smile. Your laugh. The way that only you can hold her. Making her happy…

I hate you so much…

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A/N: It starts off pretty abruptly, and ends the same way. It might be hard to follow the train of thought right now, but I simply didn't want to blurt out what is going on. What's the point of the story if the reader isn't allowed to imagine what happens? Anyways. R&R please. I would like some constructive criticism so that I now how to improve in the later chapters.

Note: Gomen- Sorry, Hai- Yes, Ne- Hey (loose interpretation), -san: suffix for politeness