Title: A Heart Not For Sale

Author: Kookykrumbs

Rating: PG-13

Summary: H/M married A sexual harassment case against Harm turns his and Mac's life upside down. AU after the episode 'Boomerang'.

Disclaimer: CBS owns these characters. I'm not making a penny off them.

Prologue

"Are you saying that a man doesn't need to understand a woman as long as she's beautiful?" Mac asked incredulously.

"Hmph, even speaking the same language, what man understands a woman?" Harm answered her question with a question.

"You're referring to me," Mac couldn't help but laugh. "Well let me guess, you don't understand why I went to the beach with Mic."

There was a long pause. Harm didn't want to admit that Mac had hit the nail right on the head. He felt cornered and decided to change the subject.

"That Opera House is really beautiful isn't it?" Harm said, pointing to his left.

Unfortunately for him, Mac didn't fall for it. "Smashing. So what bothered you? That I went to the beach with him or that you thought I was topless?"

Harm wanted to answer that it was both. He wanted to be the only man who had the right to see her topless. But then it suddenly occurred to him that Mac has said "thought".

"You weren't?" Harm asked, unable to hide the hope in his voice.

"Harmon Rabb, you are a prude!" Mac said, trying to hold back a laugh.

"I am not!" Harm retorted, feeling offended much the same way he had when he was eight years old and was called a chicken. "Look, I don't care if you want to go topless."

"You do if it's in front of Mic," Mac said, wanting some kind of confirmation that it was jealousy that she sensed from Harm.

"You work with the guy, Mac!" Harm said, exasperated. "You wouldn't go topless in front of me would you?"

"Is that a request?"

Harm almost felt the air around them begin to get hotter. Mac had brought to the surface the issue of the unresolved sexual tension between the two of them that has since remained off-topic. He didn't know what to say.

"You know, they wrote eternity on this bridge in lights on New Year's Eve."

In his own way, Harm was trying to tell Mac that eternity was what he wanted for them. But he was not yet ready. He was not sure what she was offering. He had hoped she would understand.

"Is that how long we're going to wait?" Mac asked, holding her breath, afraid of the answer.

"Mac…"

"We're not in Washington. We're not even in the same continent."

"Location doesn't change who we are."

"Most men would disagree with you."

"I know, I disagree with me sometimes too."

"But you still can't let go."

"Not yet."

"You're just this way with me aren't you?" Mac asked, trying desperately not to show the hurt that was eating her up inside.

Harm nodded. "Yeah… only with you."

"I suppose I should be flattered," Mac said, trying her best to erect her walls around her once again, salvaging what little dignity she felt she had left.

"You should, Sarah."

Mac did her best to suppress the tears that were threatening to fall. She had put her heart on the line. She offered her heart to him and he handed it right back. Hearing him say her given name almost unravelled her. Then suddenly her heartache turned to anger. She had meant to change the subject and forget their conversation had ever taken place. But her pride wouldn't let her. Harm, thinking their conversation was over, was surprised by Mac's sudden outburst.

"How am I different from Annie? From Jordan?! Why is it that you could let go with them and not with me? You get jealous when I'm with Mic, yet you never do anything about it! Why are you only this way with me?" Mac asked, no longer unable to stop the tears that had threatened to fall for some time now.

"Mac, I…"

"I guess I was foolish to think that I could ever be anything more than good ol' reliable Mac to you."

"That's not true!" Harm said, the sight of her tears making him feel like his heart was caught in a vise. "I've never let go with any woman before… Not completely."

"What do you mean?" Mac asked through the lump in her throat.

"Those relationships I had from my past were safe, Mac. They were safe because I never allowed myself to let go… not entirely. If things didn't work out then I would be fine after a while, I could survive it and move on. I can't do that with you, Mac. I can't love you half-heartedly. I wouldn't be able to handle losing you."

"I don't understand."

"I have so much I still have to work out. I'm still trying to reconcile myself with all the facts about my dad's death. I'm still trying to get back in the swing of things since coming back from flying. Not to mention that you've been giving me mixed signals. I mean it wasn't even twenty four hours ago that you were at the beach with Brumby topless!"

"I wasn't topless!" Mac snapped back, annoyed that Harm couldn't let go of the topic.

"You weren't?" Harm asked, letting a small smile escape at her revelation.

"I wasn't, you big dumb oaf!" Mac couldn't help but giggle at the obvious relief that came over Harm's face at her confession. The topic of her being topless sort of broke the tension that culminated around them. Mac added more seriously, "The offer was only for you."

Harm let her words sink in for a few moments.

"Mac, I… I love you," Harm said, not quite believing he just admitted it. "I don't want a one night stand or a fling here in Sydney. I want eternity for us. I do want there to be an 'us'. But I need time… just a little bit. I just need to take care of some unresolved issues."

"I'll wait, Harm. As long as it takes. It feels like a big weight has been lifted off me knowing that you love me."

"I appreciate your understanding, Mac. I promise, it won't be long. But you have to promise to do something for me."

"Anything."

"Let Brumby know you're not available."

"He'll know, I promise. Harm, I love you… I have for so long. Now that I know that you love me too I promise that there'll never be anyone else," Mac said, leaning forward to gently kiss Harm on the lips. It was a promise of things to come.

TBC in chapter 1

Hi again everyone! I'm back with a new story. I was so encouraged with the response I got for my story Doubts of the Heart that I decided to start a new story. I hope I got the scene from Boomerang right. As you can tell, my alternate universe diverges from that episode. I always thought that if both Harm and Mac just extended their conversation on that ferry and cleared some things up, it wouldn't have taken another 5 years for them to get together. Thank God for fan fic!