Title: Insignificance
Summary: A quick drabble about Abarai Renji's impression of Hitsugaya Toushirou before heading to the human world with him. Set during the Arrancar Arc; technically in the manga I think.
Rating: T to be safe.
Characters and Pairings: Abarai Renji and Hitsugaya Toushirou, no pairings.
Word Count: 854
Author's Note: So, my first Bleach fic. This occurred to me while I was rereading the part of the manga where Rukia, Renji, Yumichika, Ikkaku, Rangiku, and Toushirou come to the human world during the Arrancar Arc. Nothing of real importance in this. I tried to keep them as in character as possible, though I'm not sure how I did. Please review, I thrive on constructive criticism. I may decide to add a companion piece depending on how this goes over, but then I also may not. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this mindless nonsense.
Disclaimer: I do not own any little bit of Bleach; otherwise Toushirou would be real and several years older.
Renji was oddly silent as the strange assortment of people gathered together before the gate. He could feel the curious stares of his companions, the odd looks cast towards him by his friends, and yet, for whatever reason, he could not escape the sudden fear of speaking too loud, fear of even making his presence too obvious.
It was not the first time that he had felt this way either. In fact, it was exactly the same. Exactly the same as the first time that he had encountered Kuchiki Byakuya back when he was still at the academy. The same amazement at the power, the same inability to raise his eyes, the same fear of being considered insignificant.
Growling inwardly at himself, Renji attempted to shake the feeling of inadequacy off. He shouldn't be worrying about this. Not when he was about to head into almost certain danger in the real world. Of all times, now was the time to stand strong, now was the time to try to show his own potential.
But, as he cast a quick look at the short, white-haired captain standing moodily beside Matsumoto Rangiku, even the slightest surge in confidence that he had just felt was completely obliterated, replaced once more by a feeling of complete and utter helplessness.
There was so much of a difference between them, and yet it was different from the difference between him and Kuchiki Byakuya. The sixth division captain was a nobleman, born from a long line of elite fighters, the last one left, and supposedly the most powerful ever. Almost the exact opposite of Renji, the street rat, the gutter trash who had somehow managed to scrape his way up through the ranks of Shinigami to achieve the position of vice-captain. But, in comparison, Renji realized, he, and even Kuchiki Byakuya, were nowhere near as amazing as the icy captain. The youngest captain, one of the fastest graduates from the academy in history, and the fastest known achiever of Bankai yet. And he still looked like a kid.
It was this last part that daunted Renji the most, for no matter how he tried, his own inadequacy was thrown into sharp relief by the success of the young captain. He had started out exactly like him, coming from Rukongai, knowing only his 'sister'. Yet, he had managed to take Seireitei by storm, shocking all onlookers with his sheer power and determination and he still wasn't done. He still had years ahead of him in which his power would only grow as his body matured.
In comparison, Renji felt utterly useless. He could still remember when he had first heard the rumors about the icy captain. He could hear the voices ringing in his ears, exclaiming in amazement about the white-haired kid from Rukongai who was proving to be more powerful then the children of the nobles and how he was expected to graduate in virtually no time at all. And Renji remembered the absurd hope that this had sparked him upon the realization that this kid was not so unlike himself, and that maybe, just maybe, this would somehow help him in proving that he was stronger the Kuchiki Byakuya, stronger then the man who had stolen the closest thing to a sister that he had ever had.
It was only now, standing closer to the young captain then he had ever done before, that he realized the foolishness of his hopeful thinking. It was only now that he realized that, no matter how he tried, he would never be compared to the captain beside him in spite of how similar their pasts had been, because there truly was no comparison between the two of them. Renji was completely insignificant in the shadow cast by the younger male, and nothing that he ever did would ever change that. Not even if, by some miracle he managed to become more powerful then the boy, it still wouldn't be enough, because the fact of the matter was that Abarai Renji's achievements were nothing when laid out beside those of Hitsugaya Toushirou.
"Oi. Abarai-fukutaichou."
Renji started as he heard the annoyed drawl from up ahead of him, his eyes quickly focusing on the speaker.
After a few moments of waiting for a response, the captain sighed, his annoyance mounting, "Are you coming or what?"
It quickly dawned on Renji that he was the only one standing at the meeting the point, all the others now following their hell butterflies to the human world other then the lone, white-haired captain who stood scowling impatiently down at him.
"Oh. Right," Renji muttered, attempting to hide the blush that crept up his neck and across his neck. "Sorry, Hitsugaya-taichou."
Hitsugaya's scowl only deepened. "Whatever," he muttered darkly, rolling his eyes as he turned away from the red-haired man.
As the captain retreated into the darkness beyond the gate, Renji quickly followed, realizing, unhappily, that he truly was insignificant, even in the eyes of the one that had once shown as a beacon of light to him as evidence that even trash from Rukongai could achieve great things.
Once again, thanks for reading. Care to take a moment to tell me what you thought?