Disclaimer: I don't own Dynasty Warriors, the novel or the history, and any character who you don't recognise is probably my own invention.
Author's Note: Boredom does things to you, I swear XD

Chapter I. Babysitting

"Babysitting isn't really my thing," Jia Xu said matter-of-factly, folding his arms as the couple stared at him helplessly from across the desk.

"Please, sir," they said, as they turned to look at their small blonde son, who was sat in the middle of them. "He's very bright but he's a little deluded. Only someone like you can help him."

Jia Xu sighed. His fingers played with the wooden figurine on the desk in front of him. He was very close to turning the family away, but he took a brief glance at the boy in question. He was small and thin, and must have only been about eleven or twelve, but he had a very mischievous look on his face. Like he was planning something. It was something that Jia Xu recognised in himself. He took another glance at the parents and frowned, folding his arms.

"Alright," Jia Xu said, quietly sighing to himself again. "I'll mentor him for a month, and I'll make a decision then."

"Thank you, Master Jia," the boy's father grinned, bowing and walking away.

"But the price has doubled," he said, stroking his chin, his eyes turning away from them both to avoid their looks of horror. "Like I said, my area of expertise is in counselling, not in tutoring. If you want me to work out of my comfort zone, it's gonna cost you."

The boy's father looked at the mother with a mortified expression, an expression that she also shared. The boy looked straight at Jia Xu, his eyes never averting, as if he was challenging him to a staring competition. Jia Xu narrowed his eyes in response, to the point where he was almost glaring at him, but the boy still didn't turn away. He was about to pull the most intimidating face he could muster to see if he would turn in fear, but his parents had distracted him with words first.

"We'll do it," the mother said. "It's worth it."

Jia Xu turned to face the father, who was nodding in approval, and then smiled victoriously. Standing up, he walked around his desk, shaking the hands of both of the parents and then walking them to the door.

"You can pick him up on weekends," Jia Xu smiled, ushering them out of the door as politely as he could.

Once they were gone, Jia Xu turned back to face the boy, who was now stood up, flicking through various documents that he had left on the desk. Jia Xu approached him cautiously. He had never dealt with children before, so this was bound to be interesting.

"What's your name, kid?"

He had hoped that he hadn't sounded too condescending by calling him a kid, but the boy didn't seem to care, as he had moved on from the document and picked up the wooden figurine instead. It was a figurine of a soldier in imperial armour, holding a spear in action.

"My name is Jia," the boy replied, standing the figurine up on the table, and then carefully flicking it off. "Guo Jia."

"Don't do that," Jia Xu mumbled, as he leaned down to pick up the figurine and placed it back onto the table, before sitting down on the seat. "How are you deluded?"

"Sorry?" Jia said, his eyes fixed on the figurine.

"Your parents said you were deluded."

"I know. I heard. I was right here."

Jia Xu frowned at the younger boy's response. He was sassy, to say the least. He could already tell that the boy was going to be something of a problem. Jia Xu leaned over the desk and pulled the figurine closer to himself to prevent him from grabbing it or flicking it again.

"Well, how old are you, hmm?"

"Fourteen," Jia said, running a hand through his long blonde hair and then glancing over to the cabinet, filled with medals. "So you're a professional babysitter?"

"No," Jia Xu muttered painfully, his eyes following Jia's. "I'm a counsellor."

"So you offer people your counsel," Jia said, slowly withdrawing his hands.

"Yes."

"You offered my parents counsel?"

"Yes."

"About me."

"Yes, sometimes."

"And they left me with you here. So you are a babysitter."

Jia Xu clenched his fists. "I'm just a counsellor."

Jia paused for a moment and smirked. "What do they say about me?"

"Not much until the last session," Jia Xu shrugged. "They'd asked me for information on... private matters."

"You can tell me," Jia said, looking up at the older man and nodding his head. "I know more than you think."

"Hmm," Jia Xu said, stroking his chin again as he considered whether he should speak about it. "Your father wanted information on an aphrodisiac, for a little issue they have. Your father said that you being in the same house as them all the time puts him off his task. If you know what I mean."

"That's too much information," Jia winced. It was the first thing he had done which made him seem to act more like a boy than a man. "But it's also a lie."

"A lie?"

"I have an older brother, Yuan," Jia said, with a coy smile. "He used to spy on my mum. We have different mums, see. His mum died when he was little, so he fantasises about mine. He told me he saw her in bed with my uncle, Dad's brother, telling him how Dad has never been able to last longer than ten strokes."

Jia Xu frowned. "Well then."

"Sorry, you probably wasn't expecting to hear that," Jia laughed, shrugging his shoulders. "I've known for years. Mum isn't exactly the most faithful of women, but would you be surprised? She's sexually frustrated and he hides away from the issue by seeking aphrodisiacs and herbs to please himself instead of working on pleasing her instead. If he'd just address the matter with her directly instead of ignoring it outside of this room, she wouldn't stray. As often."

Jia Xu's frown had turned into a smirk. The boy was wise. Perhaps he could be useful.