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I. confession
"Look, I really like you, and I think we're meant for each other."
Maika's eyes widen at the seventeen-year-old Water Tribe boy - man, he'd reminded her too many times, even though she wasn't sure - reacting to his sudden announcement by standing speechless in her probending uniform, clutching her red helmet like a vice. Korran had said the words right after asking her to hang out sometime, but Maika was reluctant, thinking of the nice heir to the Sato fortune and business that she'd been seeing for a few weeks. He was still looking hopefully at her, his face awaiting her answer eagerly.
After a minute, she turns away, staring into her locker. She brushes her ebony braid over her shoulder.
"Korran, I'm really sorry, but I just don't feel the same way about you." Maika grinds the words out calmly, and it's a good thing she's turned with her back to the tall boy so that he can't see the guilty expression she has.
"Oh," Korran says, a defeated note in his voice. But she feels his heavy hand on her shoulder.
"Wait, that's a load of bison crap," he says, turning her around to face him. "What about that time in the park? And you staring at me all the time? 'connecting out there in that ring'?" Korran's voice rises in pitch as he sites reasons for their mutual attraction, searching for answers in her expression.
"I'm dating Asano!" Maika splutters.
"Maika, I like you so, so much," Korran says, his blue eyes intense with determination. He bends down to catch her golden-yellow ones more easily.
Maika sighs. "No, Korran."
Korran straightens, tearing himself away from her with the heavy burden of rejection on him. He turns away. "Fine. Forget I ever said anything."
He goes to his locker and changes slowly as Asano, the son of Hana Sato and heir to the Sato automobile empire, walks into the room. Bo Lin returns from thanking the crowd, as she always does, as a favorite of the spectators, and comes over to stands next to Korran. Her short black hair is plastered to her forehead before she fixes her bangs nervously. Maika notices her almost-boyfriend (they're dating but haven't made it super official that they'retogether together, Bo Lin had told Korran one time at practice) and smiles tentatively at him.
"Asano!"
"Baby, you were amazing out there," he says, folding the petite girl into his embrace. Maika smiles at him, and Korran sees it out of the corner of his eye. It makes his heart constrict in his chest because he feels like that smile will never be his, now.
"Korran, do you want to go somewhere?" Bo Lin asks, her cheeks aflame and staring at Korran's feet. She is totally nervous and embarrassed. "Sort of a...date situation?"
"I'm sorry, Bo Lin. I'm just not in the mood right now. Maybe some other time."
"No time like the present," Bo Lin says, smiling brightly as she always did. Korran looks at her sweet face and decides to humor her.
"Okay, sure."
Maika can't stop herself from grimacing as she hears this exchange.
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II. showoff
They're training in the gym right before their next match, the air still tense with their unresolved feelings as they beat the crap out of the practice dummies and then each other. Korran is waterbending viciously, Bo Lin tossing rocks like it's nothing, and Maika firebending, the attacks flying everywhere and singing, soaking, and breaking everything they come into contact with.
Afterward Korran quickly pulls off his training gear. Toza had said that the air conditioning in the gym would be fixed within a day or two but it's been a week and Korran strips quickly, revealing his white undershirt.
And also his abs.
Korran never joked about fitness, bending, or Avatar duties. He's happy and joyful, but he can get really serious. Maika has to avert her eyes from his stomach, his strong shoulders, and his toned back. He's messing with her when he bends the water over to cool himself down, freezing it around his neck. He is dripping sweat, and she watches it move slowly down his skin, compelled by gravity.
Before she can do something she might regret, she turns around, but not before Korran's knowing smirk and the slant of his blue eyes staring at her makes her face turn the same shade of red as her late mother's scarf.
"Um, good practice. Bye Korran," she says, dashing out of the gym.
"Bye, Maika," he singsongs, knowing exactly what he had done to make her leave.
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III. jealous
Walking back to the arena, Korran stares at the ground. He noticed Maika sitting on the steps leading to the entrance, and when he reaches them, she stands up. Korran felt bad for being so distraught about being rejected, but it was hard to get over the most beautiful and talented firebender he'd met in the city when she was just always sitting right in front of him.
"What are you doing with my sister?" Maika seethes as Korran stands towering over her. He flinches back, and even though he is so big and she is so little, she has the upper hand.
"Eating noodles. Having fun. Teasing that prissy waterbender lady from the Wolfbats."
"You are leading Bo Lin on. Stop it now. It's not funny anymore," Maika says, but her request is not only for her younger, sweet-tempered earthbending sister. She doesn't want Korran to have anyone else. It's quite a vicious double standard she's holding him to, dating Asano while being hurt that he's gone on a single (very platonic) date with Bo Lin.
"I am not. We're just having fun together," Korran says. "Besides, noodles are necessary for my diet and exercise! It's not just for fun. I have to do this. Avatar duty, you know?" Then something clicks in his brain and he looks at Maika, her hair disheveled (it's never disheveled) and her scarf wrapped haphazardly around her neck. Even her red lipstick is a bit smudged and faded. "Wait. This isn't about her," Korran says.
Maika tries to stomp down the feeling of surprise and immediate embarrassment that flares up before his next words.
"You're jealous," Korran says. "You do have feelings for me!" Korran's posture has changed completely, him now standing upright, crossing his arms haughtily over his developed chest.
"Pfft. Don't be ridiculous," Maika says, trying to inspect her fingernails nonchalantly, but her embarrassment is evident on her face and Korran is exploiting it.
"Admit it - you like me," Korran says, punctuating the statement with a point of his finger.
"What? No. I'm with Asano."
"Ha! When you're with him, you think about me. You like me, Maika."
"Get over yourself!"
"Just being honest."
"You are CRAZY!" Maika screams, her defensiveness overflowing toward the boy and his completely accurate accusation.
"And you're a liar!" Korran yells finally, and they turn away from each other abruptly, rushing into the arena because this is escalating far too quickly for either of them.
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"Hey Maika," Bo Lin says, exhausted and battered from the match she'd won them with a tiebreaker knockout.
"Hey Bo Lin," Maika says back. She might be jealous of her little sister, but she knows logically that absolutely none of this is her fault. She just likes Korran and wants to see if there was anything there. She can't blame her at all. She sits down next to her and helps her untie her padding in a scene similar to every single one they'd had growing orphans on the street.
"What do you think of Korran, Maika?" Bo Lin says suddenly, sleep saturating her voice. "You know, like a boyfriend?"
"He's nice," Maika says, because he was nice. He was charged with defending the entire world, as Avatar, and he'd filled in for that no-good Hasook, and he'd helping them get to the tournament, and he'd helped her find Bo Lin when she was captured by the Triple Threats and sent to their counterpart which dealt in "female services" - a practice Maika didn't condone because when they'd worked for them as girls, it was as waitresses, running through the brothel (Bo Lin hadn't know what it was at the time) and delivering money from guests to . Then she'd been captured by Amon, and they'd gone to the Rally to save her. He was a great guy, really. Nice doesn't cover it.
Bo Lin's powers of observation are not the best, but she can tell when her sister is covering something up. She turns and rests her head in her hand, elbow propped on the sofa to look at her sister.
"Maika, what's going on?"
"Nothing, I promise," Maika runs her fingers through Bo Lin's hair, untangling the knots, as they sit there talking.
"No, you like him. I can see it in your face. You do."
Maika can't refuse that. It's true. She does like him.
After a while, she sighs. "I guess."
"Well then," Bo Lin says. "You have some cleaning up to do."
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III. not that bad
The day before the championship, Korran wanders around the street, putting Triads in their place (the Triple Threats remembered him from last time and all he has to do is make an intimidating face before they run) and eating more than he should. He is not going to be upset about Maika. She likes him, and also Asano, and isn't making a decision. But it's whatever. Maybe he shouldn't do anything.
He's stopped when Asano rides up in his personal Satomobile, smiling at him.
"Korran! What's up, man?"
"Oh, you know," Korran says, trying not to seem like he's angry or awkward around Asano, because he is, but Asano wouldn't have any clue why. "Just beating up some criminals. Eating some meat buns. Bringing some justice."
"Neat!" Asano says. "Hey, wanna hang out?"
"What?" Korran is completely taken aback back the offer.
"Yeah, get in the car, dude."
"Uh, okay."
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Later, Korran's short brown hair is sticking up in all directions as he takes his helmet off. They're at the testing track for Future Industries, Asano's mother's company. They just smoked some poor sap in a red racer. Korran smiled, looking back at the track with its black marks in the concrete. His heart was still beating fast, his blood racing in his ears.
"Wow, that was amazing!"
"Glad you liked it," Asano said, smiling and pulling his own helmet off.
"I'm sorry, man, I thought you were a mama's boy. But you're cool," Korran concedes.
"Well, thanks," Asano says. "You're cool too."
So now Maika's boyfriend was a decent guy and not a sissy fool like he'd thought. And she was happy with him.
Korran wasn't a fool. He knew about Maika's past, living on the streets as an orphan, fighting for her life and Bo Lin's, and doing things no child or girl should ever have to do. She'd been scarred, beaten, had to hurt people, seen her parents die in front of her. She was serious and jaded for a reason. She'd handled things incredibly well. She was strong, and beautiful and talented, and that's why he liked her. He looked at Asano, who had lived a charmed life, but had lost his own father at a young age. They could take care of each other, Korran decided. He had the means to give her a good life, and Korran was only the Avatar, a peasant from the Southern Water Tribe who had lucked up by being born with the divine duty to protect the world. He couldn't give her the easy life Asano could. He might have loved Maika, or been close to it, but as long as Asano was good to her and made her happy, he could stop. He could give up.
Korran was about to give up completely.
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IV. offering
Korran is thinking hard about this situation before the final match outside the arena under the starlight when Maika goes to find him there. They haven't made up yet, and she feels horrible about what had happened. She brings a bag of pork buns with her and goes to sit next to him on the edge of the water where his legs dangle over Yue Bay.
"Hey," she says.
Korran looks up. "Hey."
"Can I sit down?"
"Sure."
"Korran, I'm sorry about all of this," she gestures between them and hands him a pork bun. He takes it and stares at it, avoiding looking at her.
"You don't have to say anything. I know how you feel about me."
"No you don't," Maika says. "You drive me insane, you know, but you're amazing," she says, struggling with balancing her feelings and her words.
Korran's head jerks in her direction. "So, you do like me?"
Maika sighs. "Yes, but I like Asano too. I'm really confused -"
She's cut off when Korran puts a hand on her face, turning her gaze back to him. All she sees is blue eyes before he leans forward, pressing his lips to her and turning her stomach inside out. It takes a minute, but she melts into him.
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They don't notice when Bo Lin walks away, mumbling that she knew it, and feeling kind of pitiful. Later on, Maika brushes through her hair as Bolin cries silent tears and drowns her sorrows in instant noodles. Her sister apologizes more times than Bo Lin can count before hugging her tightly.
"I'm sorry."
"I knew this was coming. It might be your fault, but this was supposed to happen."
"I'm sorry."
"Maika, it's fine." Bo Lin wipes the back of her hand across her eyes.
"Bo Lin," she looks at her green-eyed sister imploringly. "I'm sorry."
Bo Lin's sobs become loud and broken as she clutches her sister tight against her.
"I love you, Maika, but right now I really don't like you."
"That's okay. I don't like me right now either."
There's more sobbing before they fall asleep there on the couch, too tired to move.
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V. consequences
The worst time is when they discover that Hana Sato, Asano's mother, had been allied with the Equalists all the while. It was Korran who had suspected it when the girls had lost their home after the Equalist attack on the arena during the championship and Hana agreed to let them stay with them in that huge mansion. Then they'd found out what Hana had been doing...because of Asano's father's death twelve years ago due to firebending triads. Asano hadn't figured out yet what had gone one with Korran and Maika during the tournament yet, so she sticks by him, telling Korran that they have to remain friends. He's not happy about it, but it's what works in the crisis. He offers to let them stay on Air Temple Island, where he lives with the only living airbending master and her husband and three children.
In the time they'd stayed on the island, Korran's irritation toward the Sato boy somewhat disappears and they become great friends, Sato's viewpoint on the bending versus nonbending situation proving influential and helpful for Korran, who, as the Avatar, was naturally inclined to side with the bending factions.
"So what are your thoughts on the council situation?" Korran asks him one day with Maika and Bo Lin are busy training.
"Well, it's pretty unbalanced, isn't it?"
Korran had actually never thought of that, despite the weird task force situation Councilwoman Tarrla had tricked him into through public humiliation. She'd achieved quite a few things through the weird hold she had on the council, though it had helped them have the pro-bending championship at all. All of the council members were benders.
"I don't -" Korran begins.
"There aren't any nonbending representatives," Asano clarifies. "It's not equal representation."
Korran thinks about that for a minute. "You're right," he says. And it's a new thing for him, agreeing with a nonbender.
Suddenly this diplomacy thing that Tenza, his airbending master, has been stressing and working on for ages with Korran, becomes that much more complicated.
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Later, after Korran is taken away by the Northern Water Tribe councilwoman Tarrla, a bloodbender, and they find him with his polarbear dog in the city, nearly unconscious, Maika stays by him and tries to fix him up. It's really hard because she knows that she's needed in several different places at once - with the Avatar who had saved her life before many times and with the nonbending heir to the Sato fortune whose life had been torn apart by his mother's betrayal.
Korran gets better within two days, but by that time they are forced to leave the island when Equalists take over the city.
They finally face Amon, the faceless villain of the city, and Korran loses his bending completely. They discover his waterbending heritage through his captured sister and confront him, forced to combat his bloodbending with sheer will. It's then that Maika shoots lightning to protect him and he finally airbends to protect her.
The villain is revealed to the public, and he escapes.
Korran is nearly comatose afterward due to the loss of bending and the issue of internal bleeding that plagues him due to the vicious bloodbending he'd endured. He clutches his stomach, screaming from the hallway in the arena, where he is picked up and taken back home. Not Air Temple Island, no, but back to the South Pole and to his parents.
His old waterbending master heals him shortly before the bleeding would have killed him. The terrified look on Maika's face dissipates when she hears that he'll live.
But he can't do anything but airbend.
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VII. resolve
They travel back to Republic City afterward, and Korran still cannot bend anything but air. He doesn't cry in front of anyone on the boat back, but he stays alone in his room most of the time. Maika is devastated.
One morning on the top deck of the ship, Asano confronts Maika.
"I think we need to end this," he says.
Maika looks back silently.
"You like Korran," Asano says, a bit pained.
"Yes," she says.
"I care about you," he says. I want you to know that."
"I care about you too," she says back. "I'm sorry about this situation. It's horrible of me to do this to you."
"I'll be fine," Asano says. He thinks of the beautiful Fire Nation princess and general of the United Forces that came to their rescue during the attack on the city. He'll be fine. So will Maika. "Destiny is a funny thing," he says, remembering the phrase from a book he read a long time ago about a man who was almost the Fire Lord, but ended up making a huge influence in the most pivotal leader of the age, Zuko.
"It is," she smiles, looking tired from the events of the past few weeks. Asano moves to leave, giving her one last smile and squeezing her shoulder gently.
"Asano," she says, and he turns back around. He looks at her and she speaks. "I just want you to be happy, okay?"
He goes back and hugs Maika tightly. She had been horribly confused and bound by this terrible situation, but she deserved to be happy. And she wanted him to be happy.
"You too, Maika."
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Korran is losing weight by the day. He refuses to train. He never sleeps. Maika watches, hovering from a distance as he destroys himself. She'd said before he ran off for the first time that she knew she loved him. She really, really loved him. Still did. And he was throwing himself away.
She finally gets fed up with his self-abuse and bursts into his room one afternoon, furious and seething with anger. She's forgotten to put on the small amount of makeup she usually wore and her hair is unbrushed, falling around her shoulder and face with little grace.
"What the hell do you think you're doing to yourself?"
Korran looks at her. His hair isn't tied like it was normally, his bangs falling into his face. He isn't fully dressed and wears only his sweatpants and undershirt. He is sitting on his bed, his eyes tired and dark shadows below them. His normally bright demeanor has faded. He is in despair.
"Nothing," he tries to convince her, even though his faltering voice gives him away.
"Look, you have to stop this. You're going to die if you keep going like this." Maika bends to look into his eyes so that he would fully understand what she was trying to tell him.
He looks at her, his blue eyes conveying all the despair he feels. His bending was who he was. Now that it is gone, his whole self-image has shattered into pieces. He may or may not be the Avatar anymore. He certainly doesn't feel like it.
"You cannot give up, Korran. I will not let you do that." Maika grabs the sides of his head and pulls him closer. "C'mon, we're going for a walk."
"Okay," he says. He puts on his boots and coat before walking outside with her. It's snowing on the deck. While they're walking, Maika slowly takes his hand, holding it. A minute later he shakes free and begins to walk away.
"What's wrong?"
"I can't do this. I already told you, Maika."
"Why not?"
"Because I don't deserve you. I'm not the Avatar anymore. You don't have to do me any favors."
"I'm not doing you a favor. I love you," she says, clutching his hand in hers and using the other to touch his face. He leans into her. "And I am not going anywhere."
Korran smiles hesitantly, his eyes crinkling. He can't say it back yet because though he is incredibly pleased, he isn't himself. He's a shell of a boy who once was tasked with saving the world.
Maika just decides she'll fill him back up with herself and help him become the person he once was.
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About a month later, Korran is standing outside on Air Temple Island, sitting on a cliff overlooking the bay. Avatar Aang's statue stands there and Korran feels more worthless than ever. He can't even cry, even though he has the woman he loves back in the residence halls, because he's mourning the loss of his bending. He keeps training and training, and he's gotten a little better after so long without what he knows he had allowed to define him - his bending. He feels an ache deep in his chest, not knowing how to make up for the way he acted right after Katara healed him. He feels raw, as if his heart has been cut out. He can't even tell Maika he loves her, because he doesn't know if he's even capable of it anymore.
"Korran."
He wonders if he imagined that voice. He stands up and turns around.
"Avatar Aang?"
"Yes. It seemed like you needed some help, so here I am."
For the first time in a long time, Korran smiles.
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When he comes down from the high, he feels his feet touch the ground before he turns around.
He is right. She did come.
She runs at him, opening her arms. He runs to her too and they collide as he catches her. The stumble with the force of the collision before he looks into her eyes.
"Hey," he says.
"Hey," she says back before reaching up and kissing him soundly on the mouth. When they separate, she smiles, unable to look away. Their gaze is intense, filled with emotions that they didn't have the courage to express before now.
"I love you too," he says. He feels so much better, like his heart's been returned to him.
She smiles again before they continue what they had started with a kiss.
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AN: To my guest that reviewed, I don't understand what you meant by "backwards". I'll try to clarify here:
Korra=Korran; Mako=Maika, Bolin=Bo Lin; Tenzin =Tenza; Tarrlok=Tarrla, Asami=Asano.
I thought it was sort of straightforward, but I guess not. I apologize.
Genderbending is hard.
