A/N: The Mentalist? Not mine. Reviews? Hopefully yours. Also, this fic was inspired by a silly thread on The Mentalist forum on imdb.

Liar, liar...

„How dare you make that assumption!"

Teresa Lisbon was definitely scowling at him. Patrick Jane briefly wondered what would happen if he grinned at her. "It's not an assumption if it's the truth," he calmly replied. He had to bite the insides of his cheek to keep himself from grinning. Boy, that woman sure looked cute when she was in a huff.

Lisbon exhaled impatiently, "I do not have a thing for Special Agent Wade." Jane shook his head, "Liar, liar, pants…oh, wait your pants have been on fire lately." He couldn't help himself, he laughed at the memory.

If looks could kill, this office would have been a crime scene by now. Lisbon wondered if there was a body bag big enough to carry that stupid, grinning, arrogant head of his. And why couldn't she control her blushes? "It's not funny, Jane," she growled, hoping he hadn't noticed the flush in her cheeks. Who was she kidding?

Jane sobbered a bit, "You're right, it's not funny. You could've gotten hurt." Lisbon nodded, "Yes, I could have." "I'm glad you didn't," he said, giving her his most sincere smile. Was he somehow able to control her smile with that smile of his? "Thank you," she replied, hating herself for smiling back.

"But you do have a thing for that Wade fella," he cocked his head. He knew he shouldn't, but he enjoyed teasing Teresa Lisbon just a little too much. Lisbon shook her head in exasperation, "You are impossible."

"It's nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, I get the attraction. He's tall, handsome, reliable. What sane woman wouldn't want to be held in those strong arms of his, soothed by the timbre of his manly voice?"

"Shut up, Jane," Lisbon said, resisting the urge to stick her tongue out at him. Really, that stupid, wide grin of his was someday going to make her ki…erm, punch him in the face.

"Anyway, it's best that the case is over and that he'll be leaving later today," Jane said nonchalantly, wondering about the strange little play of emotions that had flitted across Lisbon's face just now.

She couldn't help herself, "How so?" He shrugged, "Well, for starters, it means that we got the bad guy. That's always a good thing, right?" Lisbon resisted the urge to go "Well, duh." She settled for a business-like nod. "And with Special Agent Wade gone, you'll be less distracted," Jane took a sip from the tea cup he'd been holding all this time. He grimaced. He did not like tea gone cold.

"Distracted?" Lisbon frowned at him. He loved how that brough out that groove in her right cheek, "Yes, distracted." Lisbon pointed at herself, "Me? Distracted?" Jane nodded solemnly, "Yes. You. Distracted." Lisbon opened her mouth to say something but Jane cut in, "Pants. On fire."

Lisbon wondered if emotional stress due to acute embarrasment would be a justified reason for a temporary insanity plea. "Lucky I was there with that vase, huh?" Jane looked just a little too smug for Lisbon's liking.

"Jane?"

He did not like her sugary sweet tone. "Yes?" he asked, unable to resist.

"Shut up."

And this time he did. Teresa Lisbon was glad.

She sighed. They had been her most flattering pants, too.