Summary: Imaginatively titled. Does what it says on the tin. Possibly a bit silly in places. Random names get thrown around, and in some chapters they might even make a decision.

Season: At an indeterminate time in the future, when Sam and Jack actually get around to having kids. At the rate they're going it'll be by some weird alien IVF when Sam's 70. This would make Jack 86, but he's all for acting his shoe size.

A/N: So, I had a sleepless night last night and started playing these scenarios in my head. Some are sillier than others, so don't be surprised if we veer slightly into out-of-character. Sam, I figure, at least has an excuse. She is pregnant, she could do anything. No offence intended if your name is bashed, insulted, or otherwise rejected during the course of this fic. Nothing personal, I promise.

Each chapter in this is self-contained, so you can view it how you like. You could see each chapter as a separate child (which could get interesting depending on how many chapters there are). Or you could view them as AUs, ATs, whatever floats your boat.

Enough babbling...

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Chapter One: A Hard Act To Follow

Sam and Jack lay length-wise across the sofa, Sam's currently medium-sized baby bump crushed slightly between them.

Twins.

They were silent, Jack's hand casually thrown across her and stroking slightly down her back.

"Jack," she said eventually.

"That's one name," he told her, "and it's mine."

"I know, I was trying to get your attention."

"Oh. Well, you don't need my name for that. You've always got my attention."

She smiled at him. "I've had a thought."

"A baby name thought? Or a 'hey, let's blow up that main-sequence star' thought?"

"A baby name thought."

"Good," he said, "you shouldn't be thinking about work."

She paused. "How about... Jacob and George?"

Jack thought about it for a second. "As in... Dad and Hammond?"

Sam nodded, looking at him trying to judge his reaction.

"Hmm." He leaned forward to kiss her lightly on the forehead, "I like it."

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They were in the kitchen, moving around as they unpacked groceries, every so often casually brushing against one another.

"What about middle names?" Jack asked.

"Huh?" Sam said, her head stuck in a cupboard.

"Middle names," Jack repeated, "Are we giving them any?"

"Actually..." Sam started.

"You've had a thought?"

Sam smiled at him unrepentantly, "I have, now that you mention it."

"Okay, what is it?"

"We've already named them after two great men,"

Jack nodded.

"How about two more?" Sam continued.

"What? Larry and Curly?" Jack asked.

Sam looked at him.

"Oh, that would leave out Moe wouldn't it? Can't do that..."

"Jack."

He stopped removing things from the bag and looked at her, a carton of eggs in his hand, "Dare I ask?"

"Daniel and Teal'c."

He was about to make another sarcastic comment, but the look on Sam's face stopped him. So he smiled instead, "Yeah, okay. I'll never hear the end of it from Daniel, but okay."

She looked at him intently, determining whether his grouchiness was actually dislike at the idea or just Jack being Jack.

It was the latter. He smiled at her, "Little tykes'll have a lot to live up to, huh? I'll be ferociously disappointed with them if they haven't saved the world several times by the time they're 18 months."

Sam smiled. "What name with what, though?" she asked.

"George Daniel." he stated with certainty, turning back to the groceries.

Sam eyed him suspiciously, "Why?"

"Because then his initials will be G.D.O."

Sam rolled her eyes.

"What? It'll be like... a little reminder."

"Because we're likely to forget."

"An inside joke then. C'mon, Sam, you know you want to."

She sighed, "I suppose I can live with it."

He grinned and leant across to give her a peck on the mouth.

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A/N: Okay, this is the most serious chapter in the story, probably closest to what I what like to see on screen. I've gotten it out of the way at the beginning, it gets a bit weirder from here on out.