A/N: I don't own InuYasha. Yay. A humorous poem about the after effects of a Hanyou eating too much food.

Ass of Fire


Ass of fire,

Bag of fertilizer,

Came out my sore backsider!


Gorged myself

On Spicy Dips

And one too many Ninja Chips,


Ramen Noodles

& Barbecue Tips,

Outta my way cuz I got da rips!


Consternation

Plus Flatulation

Equal major bowel movementation!


Toiler Paper,

Glade Aerator

Do not exist in this feudal era!


No outhouse here.

But have no fear,

A nice substitute is quite near!


God Tree'll grow

With seed I sow:

InuYoukai shit-shampoo!


Feel 10lbs lighter

48 hours later.

Turbulent anus somewhat better?


Air seems thick.

Do small check-

Flora & fauna dying real quick.


Looks like LA

To my dismay.

Why's it raining demons today?


Ding! Litebulb on!

Ass pois-on

Kills more than 100 de-mon!


Screw katana!

Off with hakama,

Look out while I bend over!


Point ass to sky.

Let one fly!

Butt something's gone awry…


Pain immense.

No common sense.

Rub tender gluteus maximus.


Something's wet.

Awwww yuck!

Can't believe I stepped in it.


Look behind me,

Cautiously see

A very wide-eyed Inu-Tachi.


Friends aghast

By the big blast

"That came out your ass?"


Laid a portrait

Or a statuette-

Work of (f)art, holy f'n shit!


Won award,

Upgrade 4 sword-

Funky Stench Potty Blade!


Now to defeat

That Deadbeat

With new air-splitting technique!


Tried to depart,

Body fell apart

Due to incessant stinging fart(s).


Can't walk right

Nor sit up straight

Won't be killing demons tonite.


Oh cool, neato!

Got proviso (item).

WTF is this stuff called "Beano?"


Need beer,

Just laying here

With naked Vaseline covered rear.


Buddies smirk.

Bunch o'jerks!

They know how much ass hurts.


They still smile…

Growl, snarl.

Swearing off food for a while.


Totally beat.

Can't take heat!

Hey! By the way, what's to eat?