This is an email I wrote to my friend when I got bored. Beware the crack. It's also very short, but anyways, who cares.
I own no Naruto.
Alright, children, gather round and you shall hear of the legendary "Saint Shikamaru". Once upon a time, there was a legendary genius who was always bored, and his name was Shikamaru. He had a mental age of 72, and liked to play boring games like Go and Shogi. After incinerating a demon named Kyo who was harassing Konoha, he got the fun idea of conquering the world. Which he did. After he died, he became a saint, and now he manipulates us all like stones on a Go board. Remember little children, when you touch yourselves in naughty places, Saint Shikamaru is watching. To please great Saint Shikamaru, you must meditate with your hands forming a circle and chanting his favorite mantra "How troublesome". And that, little children, is the story of saint Shikamaru.
