Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But I do own you! (Hmmm maybe not)
Brotherly Friction

By spikescrypt

Summary: If there was one thing Ron's brothers knew it was to never say anything bad about Hermione.

"So there I was minding my own business and this bird comes up to me and asks if I want to buy her drink. Never mind that I've never even seen her before or didn't know her name. Just bold as brass sits next to me and asks me too buy her a drink. But she was quite attractive so I said 'why yes little lady I would love too get you a drink.'

A loud chorus of laughter fills the table and Charlie leaned eagerly toward Fred. "So then what happened?"

"Well I get her that drink and she smiles at me and stands to leave and I say 'what no thank you?' And she says 'your thank you is on the table' and I look down and she's left me her number."

"So did you call her?"

"Nah, what would I have in common with a Muggle? But I tell you those Muggle girls sure are hot to trot."

"If you aren't going to call her than can I have her number?" George was only half joking.

"Like she would want to date you and get turned into a bloody canary," Ron chuckled.

"Hey, a woman loves a man with a good sense of humour not too mention that Fred and I are devilishly handsome."

"Too right George," Fred raised his glass to his twin.

Six firewhisky's later the four brothers reached their limit. Ron was exceptionally red in the face and Fred was telling the same story again apparently forgetting he had already told it.

"Those Muggle girls sure are hot to trot," he said again and tipped his glass to Ron.

"You sure are lucky Ron," George agreed.

"What why?" Ron's forehead creased in confusion.

"Your married to a Muggle-born mate. Hermione can't be prim and proper all the time, tell us is she a wildcat in bed?"

"You shut up about Hermione," Ron yelled his face turning red in anger.

"Oh come on Ronny don't hold out on us, I bet she's a right firecracker that one. The way you two fight I bet that passion heats up the bedroom nicely." Fred laughed completely oblivious to Ron's anger.

"Fred maybe you should stop," Charlie warned seeing Ron clench his fists in anger.

But Fred was on a roll. "That Hermione sure does have some nice assets, that tight little arse and those pert…."

He was forced to stop mid sentence as Ron threw himself at him and pushed him up against a wall. Before he even saw it coming Ron's fist came down on his face and punched him three times in quick succession.

George tried to pull Ron away from Fred but was having no luck, he might have been older but Ron was bigger.

Suddenly, Ron's whole body went rigid and he fell to the floor, stiff as a board.

George turned and saw Charlie pointing his wand at Ron, a sheepish smile on his face.

"Full-body bind," he explained.

George bent to check on Fred who had slid down the wall. His nose was bleeding and he had a black eye but was otherwise unharmed.

"Get him out of here," Charlie ordered him.

George nodded and had his twin lean on him but Fred was swaying dangerously. He knew that he was in no condition to apparate himself and so he apparted both of them to their flat above the joke shop.