The River
It was hot.
Kakashi was a little disappointed by this inaccurate description of the day's temperature and tried to think of a better one.
It was really, really hot.
And that about said it.
Cicadas buzzed incessantly from the forest trees making it difficult to pick out any other sound. Heat radiated in steady pulses from the sun, sticking low to the ground and spreading itself there like a melting blob of gravy still hot from the stove, making even the shadows humid and sticky. Not even a ghost of a cool breeze could be found, causing the leaves and branches to hang limp, dull, and useless. Much like how nearly everyone in the village felt today.
When Kakashi had finally shown up for his team that day, he was afraid they'd all died of dehydration. Sakura was sitting on the bridge, leaning heavily on a post and staring longingly at the blue river below. Naruto had long discarded appearances and was already floating face-up in the water, but the look of misery on his face suggested it offered little relief from the sun's rays. Even the impervious Uchiha Sasuke looked as though he were moments away from fainting of heatstroke.
Training did not improve things, and their one mission for the day made everything worse. Moods were snappy and tense under the blazing temperatures, and no one in their own wretchedness felt like compromising, let alone working together. Jobs were finished curtly and with little sincerity, the occasional tempered remark flying through the hot, dead air. Two hours in, Kakashi decided to call it a day before someone's head flew, and with how impatient he was feeling himself, thought it best before it was caused by his own hand. They'd all parted with little grace and much gratitude; Sakura didn't even bother sticking around to ask Sasuke for a date.
It was that hot.
An hour later, Kakashi found himself standing by one of the riverbeds further away from the societies of the village. It was a spot he was familiar with, coming here often for a quiet moment to reflect without being haunted by ghosts, or just to have a nice corner to catch up on some reading. He'd come there to ease his mind and with a hope that the forests would prove cooler than the activities of town, but today no place felt liberating from the summer heat. Even the dense shade of the trees felt more like an oven than actual refuge.
It was quiet at the least. While the cicadas made their chattering call even here, it was a more welcome noise than Naruto's caterwauling, Sakura's complaints, or the blistering remarks of Sasuke. With bugs, at least he didn't understand what they were saying or become obligated to reply.
The water, while flat and untouched by wind, made its own whisper that proved to be the most soothing sound he'd heard all day. Bending down, he took off a glove to let his bare hand be swallowed by its strong but subtle flow. It was a disappointing temperature, feeling barely cooler than lukewarm; but it was something. Throat parched, he scooped up a handful of river, pulling down his mask only far and long enough to allow himself a drink. While not exactly refreshing, it solved his thirst and he dried his hand along his face, tucking his palm under his headband to wet his brow and covered eye; a useless effort since no wind blew to cool his sweat.
All the same it somehow felt strangely gratifying. He watched the river for a moment longer, thoughtful. Then he seemed to come to a decision and stood, stripping off his gloves and jacket, placing them next to his headband and sandals on the bank before walking out onto the water. He allowed just a small amount of the current to wash over his feet as he stood some yards away from shore, hands moving swift and fluid over well-practiced seals.
All at once the surface exploded. The river reared on its end like a whinnying horse, twisting itself into a small cyclone that blew wind and water drops in all directions. Then, just as a spinning top exhausts its momentum, it wobbled violent and drunk, fattening with lost force before splaying itself everywhere at once. The spray was followed by a gust of wind that while warm, was enough to relieve the moisture that had fallen onto Kakashi. It left him regrettably damp in the humid aftermath, but the pleasing indulgence it had given felt worth the price.
He stood there a moment longer, listening to the waves lap along the bank, contemplating if he wanted to do it again or just dry off.
"Thanks for that," a slightly embittered voice stated.
For his standing credit as an elite ninja of Konoha, Kakashi didn't jump to show how startled he actually was, but instead lazily inclined his head to glance behind him and up at the figure he suddenly spotted sitting there in a crook of a large branch.
"Most people just buy air conditioning, you know."
"Ah, Kurenai."
Her dark, red eyes—which had made her infamous in the village with the rumor that she could put one under a spell just by holding eye-contact—peered at him, coupled with a thin-lipped expression that overall didn't look very amused. While she wasn't dripping, it was clear she'd been an unwilling participant in his curious cooling experiment. He wondered how long she'd been there and why she seemed so upset about a little liquid when he caught sight of the book in her hand; no doubt now a victim to water damage.
"Sorry," he said, slapping on a sheepish grin. "I didn't see you there."
"So I noticed," she replied evenly, wiping a few drops from the pages. "But I didn't really do anything to draw attention to myself I guess, so it's not really your fault." She blinked when Kakashi appeared across from her a second later, crouching back on the branch she was on as it curved upward.
"What's that?" he asked, casually swiping the volume from her fingers. "A bit of light reading?"
She reached to claim it back but he nimbly kept it from her. "You could say that."
"Anything… naughty?" he teased, flipping the pages sideways as if in hopes a racy centerfold would pop out.
"It's not one of your books."
"Konohakagure History?" he read, coming to the title page. He glanced up at her with disinterest. "You're already boring enough as is, Kurenai. Must you practice?"
She snatched the publication back intolerantly, stiffly retreating back to her side of the limb without a word. He grinned and waved apologetically.
"Kidding, kidding! Sorry," he said, trying to really mean it. The meaner side of him, which had been provoked by the day's events, actually felt a little good letting an insulting quip fly. Rationally he knew he shouldn't be taking it out her, but even when he wasn't feeling bitter, making other people squirm was something he always found fun to watch. Especially people as collected as Kurenai.
The kunoichi made a nasal scoff in response to his apology that sounded neither dismissing nor believing of his word. He decided he had been forgiven. It was just easier to think that way, and if he was wrong he was sure to find out soon enough.
"I didn't realize you came here," he said to restart pleasantries, taking notice for the first time that instead of her usual bandage ensemble, Kurenai wore her red jumper and vest. But the jacket hung open and the turtleneck was replaced by a v-cut top kept decent by nylon netting while her shoes lay by her side. And was that a senbon needle keeping her hair up?
"I don't. Usually." Her tone was polite, if guarded. It seemed she was willing enough to forgive and forget. "I just decided to try something different today. You know how that is, don't you?"
He shrugged just to be difficult. "Sure I guess. There's something to be said in the comforts of routine though."
She cast a glance up at him, one eyebrow sleekly raised. "Really? Sounds boring to me…"
Okay, so maybe not to ready to forget. He made a half-hearted chuckle acknowledging her witticism and apparent ability to hold a grudge. "How long have you been here?" he asked, changing the subject back around.
"Long enough."
"How long is that?"
"Before you."
He stared at her levelly with his one open eye. "Chatty, aren't you."
"For someone who doesn't give out much information himself, you sure expect an awful lot of it back in return." Kurenai sighed however, seeming to reconsider herself. "A little less than an hour. It surprised me to see anyone else come here. When you started taking off your clothes I was afraid you were going to go skinny-dipping."
"Hmm, that's not a bad idea," Kakashi hummed, eyeing the river behind him. "Care to join me?"
"If you wanted me to leave, you just had to say so."
"Kidding, kidding!" he waved again.
She frowned at him, but moved the topic along. "Do you come here often?"
"Once in a while, I guess. It's quiet at least."
"I really can leave if I'm intruding." He wondered if she was being considerate or just looking for a real excuse to depart from his company.
"Well, you were here first…"
"Yes, but if it's personal to you, then I can leave."
"It doesn't exactly have my name on it."
"Does something have to in order to hold such importance?"
Kakashi stopped his turn in the conversation to regard her carefully. Her eyes blinked back at him, open and honest. "You're very patient, aren't you."
Her eyebrows knitted together, as though to ask what had provoked such a statement. There was a considering pause before she answered, "Not always. But I find it a crucial trait for any good shinobi to have, don't you?"
He made a non-committal sound. "It helps."
"It's a good trait of a teacher at least."
His neutrality took on a form of silence and a casual glance in the other direction.
"…Or in some cases a good trait for the students…" she mumbled, propping her book up again.
"You say something?"
"Did I...?" she replied with swift innocence. If she was expecting a reaction from that he didn't give her one; but she didn't wait. "Speaking of which, are you already done with your team today?"
"I think we were all done with each other really," he coughed.
"The heat?"
"What else?" He paused, thinking that over. "On second thought, don't answer that."
"My team wasn't handling it too well either. Shino was using some sort of cooling method involving bug wings, and Kiba and Akamaru spent most of the time panting when they weren't complaining about the buzzing. …They all wear jackets. Even on days like this. Why is that?" Kakashi didn't offer her a reason, but she wasn't looking for one. She eyed the afternoon sun that glittered through the leaves. "It is hot."
"Did you just now notice?"
"You're supposed to know over a thousand jutsu, right? Besides uprooting the river, don't you know any techniques that can help keep you cool?"
"I do," he said, shifting back into a more comfortable position. "But keeping my underwear frozen all day takes up more chakra than I care to spend."
"Forget I asked," Kurenai deadpanned, returning to her pages.
Kakashi chuckled. "You're the one who said I didn't give enough information before."
"A statement I lament ever making." Her red eyes shot back up at him. "Can't you ever be serious?"
"What fun is that?" He cast her a lazy stare. "Besides, there is also such a thing as being too serious. You should try lightening up a bit."
"I'll lighten up when I'm amused. …And I'm not being too serious," she added in weak defense.
"Of course not," he agreed dispassionately. She gave a withering look at him to which he made an observation. "We don't seem to be getting along too well, do we?"
"Is that supposed to be my fault?"
"I didn't say that." The comment was polite but without a tone of denial. "However, between two people it usually goes both ways. It's no one's fault, it just happens that way."
Kurenai stared at him silently, bringing the chitterling cicadas back into focus for a moment. "The heat's made my thinking a little sluggish," she said at last, bringing a hand up to fiddle with her head protector. "Care to explain that?"
"To put it simply, there are things you don't like about me, and there are things I don't like about you."
"And am I supposed to care what you think?"
He shrugged listlessly. "Depends. What would you say if I were to tell you that you're the most unexciting woman I've ever met?"
She scowled. "Congratulations, you have an opinion."
"What if I were to tell you you're the most beautiful?" She blinked, her eyes suddenly off-guard and questioning as her palm hovered near her head without purpose. He smiled and made an amused murmur. "So, you can take an insult but not a compliment. Interesting…"
She let go of a breath in an irritated exhale, hand dropping heavily to her side. "It's not so much accepting your words as believing it."
Kakashi stared at her curiously. "I'm not trustworthy?"
"It's not so much a matter of trust as it is… credibility."
He didn't look particularly pleased at that either. "I'm not credible?"
She waved at the air in front of her, trying to dismiss the topic. "I don't know. I couldn't justly say for sure. I don't know you." She paused a moment looking between his face and her book. "Although that's something I think most people can say when concerning you."
"…You're also quite honest."
"Full of compliments today, aren't you."
"Is that how you took it?" he drawled lightly. He folded his arms, tilting his head back and watched what sky he could see through the foliage. "Alright, I'm curious now. What exactly do you think of me, Kurenai?"
She blinked. "Excuse me?"
"What do you think of me?" he repeated again. "You've guarded your opinion thus far behind the excuse of not knowing me, and while fair, I'm curious into hearing what you do think you know about me. Or at least what makes you assume I have no credibility."
"Must we go through this?"
"I'm interested in hearing your opinion. Besides, I like getting these kinds of things out in the open."
There was a sigh and the sound of a book closing. "Fine, if only to make things clear on where we stand."
He picked his head up just enough to look at her. "Where we stand?"
"Yes. I tell you what I think of you, and you tell me what you think of me. I find it a simple and reasonable enough trade, don't you?"
He shrugged, head resting back again. "Okay. Although I just thought you said you didn't care what I think."
"I also didn't say I would, but like you, let's just say I'm curious. And besides that…" She tucked her publication somewhere behind her. "This is my third time reading this book. I'm a little bored myself."
"Or boring," Kakashi breathed.
"What was that?"
"Please, do begin," he coughed.
"Fine. Understand that I'm going to be perfectly frank with you."
"Wouldn't like it any other way."
"Where would you like me to start?"
"Oh, got a list, eh?" He closed his eyes as though settling in for a nap. "Anywhere you want," he replied in a breath that she couldn't quite tell whether it was a sigh or a yawn.
"Alright," she began, straightening herself professionally. "You're irresponsible. While you obviously have the discipline to do enough training that maintains your reputation, you have little to no regard for punctuality." He made a brief chuckle, as though he had been expecting that. She continued regardless.
"You care little for your appearances as a shinobi. Reading the books you do in broad daylight with no shame, sometimes even in the presence of authority. While I'll admit I've yet to see it drop your guard, it's still unprofessional behavior for a ninja of your rank and stature.
"You're also proud. You may not make an effort to flaunt yourself highly, but at the same time, your laid-back attitude gives others the impression that you don't have the time to recognize their talents. And your habit of teasing others only seems to emphasize that, along with making you inconsiderate."
"…And the reason I'm not credible?" he asked.
"For most of the reasons listed above. You tease, joke, undermine superiors, and just tend to brush off people or problems in general. Like I said before, you're not serious enough. I can hardly ever trust your word or opinion to really be your own and not just another mind game you play for your own amusement."
There was a pause. "So basically…" Again his head raised just enough to see her face. "I'm a negligent, egotistical bastard with a twisted sense of humor and no respect for authority."
"I would've just called you a prick."
"Did I miss anything else?"
"You can add 'crude' to the list."
"Oh, of course." His head was set back down as he seemed to absorb this thoughtfully, but unsurprisingly without care. "It's your turn," she said after having waited for him to do so in a reasonable amount of given time.
"Alright," he said without shifting. "You're boring."
A droned, "Yes, I remember that one."
"No, I mean you're really, really boring."
"And?"
"Dull."
An exasperated exhale. "Is that all you're going to say? If so, I'm going to have to add 'unoriginal' to your list."
And then suddenly he was looking at her, weight shifted back onto his right elbow as he sat up and met her. Before she could think to wonder what the expression on his face meant, he was asking, "Have you ever heard the expression of being 'bored to death', Kurenai?" In her miff she only nodded. "Well you have been bored to death by your own dullness." And with that he leaned back into his former position. Immediately she began to sputter indignantly.
"W-What is that supposed to mean!"
"It means you don't live it up enough." He waved a hand in the air without lifting any other part of his body. "I'm not saying you need to go out and party all night or get wasted—although that would definitely be amusing, let me know if you ever do that—but you could stand to laugh or smile a little more yourself. Not be so uptight about the rules all the time, tell a joke and whatnot. I may have a twisted sense of humor, Kurenai, but it's better than not having one at all."
"I hate to ruin your idealism, Kakashi," she nearly growled through her teeth, "but we're not all geniuses like you and most of us have to work hard in order to keep our guard and skills up. And there's none of the romanticized glamour in the life of a ninja that really allows us the freedom to seek out personal gain or pleasures. You either live your life for yourself or you give it completely to the village." Her voice had grown quieter. "There's honor but not much humor in that, Kakashi."
"Exactly," he replied, sparing a more somber glance at her. "There really isn't much for people like us to laugh about. But don't you think that's all the more reason for us to find one?" She didn't appear to have anything to say to that and he looked back up through the leaves. "I do."
The sound of the cicadas were brought back into the foreground as they didn't say anything else to each other for a long while. The daylight dwindled closer to the horizon, casting longer shadows and the first splashes of orange and red. It was still hot but no longer with the beating intensity it had during the day, and the night promised to be cooler if no less humid. Appropriately the mood between them seemed to share similar effects: cooler if no less reserved and distant.
"Do you really think I'm boring?" Her voice was silky in how it broke their silence, dancing between curiosity and dismissal.
He cocked his head to the side, somehow with the same tone. "Do you really think I'm not credible?"
She murmured undecidedly, thinning her bottom lip in thought. Then without an answer, she breathed in a way that almost could have been a chortle with more effort before standing and picking up her book and sandals. "I think it's getting late."
He really should've been moving on with his day as well, but the ice had been broken again and he was free to argue purely for the sake of being a nuisance. "It's not even sunset," he pointed out to disprove her excuse. "You could wait a little longer before saying its dark. That would actually be the perfect time for that skinny dipping idea, you know…"
Kakashi had to move fast from his laid back position in order to avoid being kicked out of the tree and into the river; something he made look irritatingly easy. He jumped down out on his own accord (and for his own safety) and landed beside his folded clothing.
"I can't believe I forgot to add 'perverted' to the list," she scowled.
"Violent tendencies," he added himself, shrugging on his flak jacket. "Along with disturbing signs of permanent menstruation."
"I still don't care what you think," she shot back. "And I doubt I ever will."
"And that, Kurenai," he replied, suddenly smiling up with a kindness that should have belonged in another setting, "is exactly what I like about you."
It was fun to watch her stand there a moment longer completely speechless as no doubt her mind bounced back and forth between taking him sincerely and stubbornly keeping to her own words. A thoroughly annoyed flush and a bitterly hissed "idiot" seemed to be her decision, and after them she was gone. He would have chuckled to himself, but for a moment he was too busy struck by his own curiosity at how much he did or didn't mean those words. Then he thought about how this question only seemed to prove her point about his credibility—he even doubted himself, and the last thing he needed was for Kurenai to be proven right.
Sliding into his sandals and picking up the rest of his belongings, he departed himself and excused any further such oddities from his mind.
It was probably just the heat.
owari
-----
Authoress Notes
Here it is, the one-shot I promised I'd been writing in my KakaKure drabbles writer's notes. It's not exactly romance as you can see--and I'm not ENTIRELY sure it'll stay a one-shot—but it wasn't meant to be. Allow me to attempt a brief explanation:
I started writing KakaKure drabbles back near the end of 2004, and at that time I was only writing them to entertain/gift a friend of mine; I wasn't into the couple at all myself. But the more I entertain and gifted, the more I tried to seriously think of how Kakashi and Kurenai would/could ever end up together. It took me a whole year to finally like the pairing, but like it I did.
While I write drabbles with more romantic results/implications/tones/etc, I personally have always felt that if they did have any sort of relationship together, it would be a long and slow process. Eventually I began writing this fanfic to satisfy my own personal views and feelings of a developing relationship between the two. Obviously, the term "developing relationship" implies that this was not supposed to be just a one-shot, and indeed it's not. But I began losing my wind for this one as I was able to express myself better in drabbles.
However, perhaps I really will continue this fic one day, because as you can see, nothing was really accomplished in this scene other than to establish how I saw them really reacting to each other--which was exactly what I'd always intended anyhow. As chapters were to go on, ever-so-slowly, something new would be found, or a layer of their hard skins would be removed. Either way, this isn't a story about passion and breakthroughs or even hot, sexual tension; it's about what I really think of whatever romance could develop between Kakashi and Kurenai:
A journey of the every day life, trials in patience as well as spirit, arguments and not enough apologies, profound discoveries, and the quiet bonds woven with companionship and time.
...And I'm still not completely happy with how I ended this one. Sigh.
