WELCOME READERS!

As the title of this story suggests, you have wandered into the fifth installment of my New Kid Stories, stories centered around my Cis!Female New Kid from The Stick of Truth and Fractured But Whole South Park games. If you're a new reader and the idea of this ongoing series peaks your interest, you are welcome to join us at this installment or go back and read them in their entirety- I do my best to pen these things so a curious reader can pick up anywhere and basically get what's going on... but, like all serial fiction, there's a lot of fine details to be found in reading everything.

For my regular readers who are returning, good to have you with us. Glad I haven't scared you away, yet.

As always, it's time to post my caveat for these stories. The New Kid Stories are my just-for-fun writing project, and while I have since caught up with the entirety of South Park I'm still not going to look up and double check every little thing when I'm writing these stories for pleasure. If I fucked up some detail from the shows, and that ruins all of this free content for you, I would suggest that perhaps you're reading the wrong series of stories.

That said, if you find spelling or grammar errors, I would appreciate being notified of them so I can hunt them down and fix them.

Cool? Cool.

ONWARDS!

::Mutual Cat Daddies – A Mall Themed Recap::

Despite Thanksgiving being the next major holiday on the calendar, the South Park mall had not taken a single day decorated as such; instead trotting out the Christmas lights immediately after Halloween. It wasn't critical mass of Christmas just yet, but there certainly were not any turkey-day decorations in any shop windows when snowflake motifs and advertisements for Christmas sales were much more eye-catching to the general public... and more likely to get them to spend money. Truly, if Dee bent her brain upon recalling, it would seem that the only stores who had taken it upon themselves to put up decorations for the most fattening of American holidays were grocery stores who were already running specials on spices, stuffing, and birds... despite the day in question being two weeks out just yet.

Well, that and her own home, which her father had begun decorating only moments after he and her mother arrived back at the house from hiding... though the first thing he did was hug the shit out of her, right before mom started grilling her about what she did while the house was devoid of parental units for a whole weekend.

Still, she wasn't at home, she was at the mall- and for once she wasn't all on her lonesome trying to decide what to spend her coin-filled piggy bank on. Dee had arrived as one member of a group, with Kenny at her side and the pair of Stan and Kyle keeping pace as they arrived at the food court. The mall had only opened a few minutes ago, and thus many places were still getting the lights on and lifting their security shutters. The seating area was utterly deserted, which fit the group of four just fine as they queued up at a just-opened taco place, got some early lunch, and descended upon a table to eat and get down to business.

Things hadn't been silent; Dee had simply been tuned out, as she frequently was. Stan and Kyle had been holding a conversation this entire time, with occasional comments by Kenny, but she only came back around to listen as they took their seats and unwrapped their cheap junk food for hasty consumption.

"It's all consumerism, Kyle. The decorations are for what's most profitable." Stan was informing flatly.

"But even the cashier said happy holidays- It's not even December!" Kyle crowed.

"Dude, the X-mas season has been expanding for years. You haven't noticed?" Kenny, with his two cents and a pointed question.

"Yeah, sure I noticed- but it's like they've deleted Thanksgiving entirely from the holiday cycle! What happened to waiting until Black Friday to put all the winter holiday decorations up? And the sales! I saw a store already advertising thirty percent off of everything and calling it a holiday sale! I thought we'd drawn a line as a society against this kind of rampant consumer culture and made room for Thanksgiving as the family holiday that let us be thankful for stuff before we started going crazy with wanting things."

"Line drawn in sand, maybe." Stan scoffed, his inner cynic showing as he wolfed into his taco. "We're at a mall, that's like... the temple of the consumer gods. Of course they're going to advertise Christmas over Thanksgiving. No one at a mall cares about being thankful or family time- they only use the idea of family to guilt people into buying more stuff. You can't expect any kind of moral code to hold back the season that every executive salivates over when it comes to the bottom line."

"Yeah, seriously- and most businesses have started skipping food-drive related discounts- no one gives a fuck if people are giving, it's all about spending." Kenny huffed, his own concerns added to the conversation before he unzipped his hood and tugged his scarf down, crunching into a taco that Dee had paid for from her place at the front of the line when they'd grabbed food. "X-mas is like a a holiday themed hooker's vagina- it's so huge it sucks in everything."

"Dude, gross." Kyle groused, disenchantment compounded with Kenny's... eloquent imagery. "Ugh, but you're right."

Dee found herself staring on, picking up on a certain level of discouraged exhaustion that was much more customary coming from Stan than it was Kyle- she supposed his family was the most together out of the group; what with his efforts to stay close to his adopted brother and not piss off his parents beyond the 'I don't want to get in trouble' obligations. Seems like a lot of bother to me. She mentally murmured. Thanksgiving has always been more about food than family, but that's kinda how Dad connects with people anyhow... and it's always just been the three of us; moving around your whole life means no local family members... and the government was probably watching any extended family we had in case my parents tried to contact them after escaping.

Now that was an interesting thought. Considering recent work she'd done, what with getting the government off of her ass and getting the US President to kill a time-clone of herself so she'd be officially dead on the record, there was a chance that her parents could reconnect with family members they'd lost touch with after going into hiding. Did she have extended family? Aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins? If so, where did they live? She didn't know the first thing about it... and considering the story of how she came into the world, did her extended family even know that her parents were together and had a kid?

Maybe, the photo of me right after being born did go viral on multiple platforms. I should dig it up, see if they included any personal information, or if any family members identified themselves in the comments. Wendy could help me dredge the data...

"Oh, jeez, he's spacing out again. Earth to Dee! Come back to us, cadet!"

Green eyes fluttered, and Dee dropped out of her thought cloud and felt as if she'd hit the cheap plastic chair with a shock. Bewildered, she stared at Kyle, who had insisted she return to the group. Her taco had disappeared; she'd eaten it while drifting off into her musings.

Yes, hi, I am here. What's up?

"You guys made it seem like it was a big deal that I came with you, today." Kyle pointed out. "Do I get to know the reason, or are you dragging out suspense for a surprise?"

Oh, right, that. Dee's gaze shifted away from Kyle and over to Stan, brow turning flat over her eyes to give him a look. You're up, champ, you're the one who wanted to tell him.

"Dude, don't gimme that look- you're the one who okayed it." Stan defended himself.

Under severe peer pressure. Now say your piece and be done with it.

Under the table, she felt Kenny nudge her. With a begrudging hesitation, she eased off with the glare-power and let out a soft scoff, gesturing a hand towards Kyle that opened the floor to Stan with a more hospitable mood to draw from.

"Guys? What is this all about?" Kyle gained a note of tension, but also excitement; if only because Cartman was nowhere to be seen, so chances of disaster were lower than normal.

"Well- you remember Bebe's party?" Stan asked, looking expectantly over to his friend. "How Dee pulled me an' Wendy aside for something with Bebe?"

"Yeah, you all disappeared into the basement; Cartman started saying some shit about how Bebe was high on the success and wanted to get banged by a bunch of dudes all at once while Wendy watched and/or joined in. He was trying to convince Jimmy to listen at the door, and I started yelling at him. You all came back upstairs just as he was about to charge down there with his phone camera in hopes of getting a candid shot. You said that you had to help Dee explain to Bebe about the whole mind controlling the president thing."

"Yeah- and that is what happened, but... okay, Bebe totally guessed this out of the blue and it took me by surprise but..." Stan paused for effect. "Dee and Kenny. They're dating."

Kyle blinked. He stared at Stan, and then looked across the table to where Dee and Kenny had arranged themselves side-by-side. Dee had already braced herself for a number of reactions; anywhere from utter rejection to rejoicing jubilation- the spectrum between her worst fear of getting ostracized from one of the few people she actually liked hanging out with, and her... discomfort with sudden invasions of her space; like when Wendy found out and hugged her without warning. Kenny had responded to this stiffness while Kyle had been looking away, scooting his chair a little closer and reaching across the gap to put his hand on her shoulder; a gloved reminder that he was there with her that she could feel through the layers of her electric blue hoodie and her bulky black winter coat.

Both Stan and Kyle were still under the impression, as they had been for years, that she was a boy. Neither of them shared Cartman's homophobia, but people could exhibit odd behaviors when things they were simply okay with were suddenly directly in their sphere. Stan had accepted the revelation with shock, but ultimately extended his acceptance. She could only hope Kyle was of the same mind... and equally willing to keep the secret.

Under the table, Dee found herself reaching for Kenny in turn, unsure of where to place a comfort-seeking hand and slipping it over his leg, awkward calculation arguing between exactly how close to either knee or crotch was acceptable while also being unaware of how close she'd gotten to the desired location in the middle- she was, after all, groping blindly.

"But... I thought... Kenny, aren't you... y'know, all about the boobies?"

Stan started laughing. "I said the same thing!"

Kenny himself broke into a lop-sided smile, shaking his head at his friends. "All titties are good titties- even manly ones."

Dee couldn't help cracking a smile herself- she'd known Kenny was bi for a while, though it was clear he favored squishy lady bits in general... somewhat evidenced by the fact that he didn't even consider her to be on his romantic radar until after she revealed to him that she was a girl. On the other hand, she'd offered up that little fact out of trust, so maybe that had been the deciding factor of them getting closer? She hadn't actually investigated if he'd been interested before that moment.

Fuck knows I was- I just tried to ignore it as hard as I could. Did he have a crush on me, too, and me talking to him just opened the door for us to get closer, gender-reveal not withstanding?

Kyle still seemed to be catching up, or at least going through some recent memories with new context. "Damn, I shoulda noticed sooner; you guys have been doing everything together since the school year started. What happened? Was it just kinda... you noticed each other all of the sudden? Or have you always had the hots for each other and just didn't move on it until now?"

"Little bit of column A, little bit of column B." Kenny shrugged it off, discounting it as no big deal; an action that made Dee rather thankful. More so was that Kyle was looking to him for answers. Usually she was all about representing herself, but right now? She was content to be the silent shadow while he fielded the questions and explained things. "Dee's not cool with everyone knowing just yet, though, so keep it to yourself? We're telling you because Stan was gonna bust a stress nut if he didn't tell his bestie."

"My therapist says keeping secrets from the people closest to me sabotages my support structures when I need them the most." Stan defended, though it was halfhearted at best. Dee felt that it was a secondary explanation to the fact that it just felt good to tell a friend something that they didn't know- particularly when it wasn't shitty news. "You don't gotta make it sound like I was having a meltdown, dude."

"Who else knows?" Kyle quested.

"Bebe guessed it." Kenny responded while pulling his hood back up, though he left it unzipped and let his scarf sag about his neck. "We told Butters. Wendy found out by accident. And then there's you guys- that's everyone."

Butters. Butters was the first to find out, in fact, and had been their biggest ally in hanging out together without looking like a couple. He'd been their third wheel whenever they wanted to go somewhere or do something in public. Outside of Kenny, she'd easily name him as her best friend.

"Shit, speaking of Butters, isn't he getting out of the hospital tomorrow?" Stan asked. "Wendy wanted to get him a coming home present, but I have no idea what to buy for him."

"That's right." Kenny confirmed. "And that's actually the reason we wanted to meet here. Did you hear about Butters's hamster?"

"His hamster?" Kyle shook his head no, and Stan looked equally clueless. She didn't blame either of them. With everything that happened that night, one furry casualty could easily slip through the cracks of what information was deemed important enough to pass on from the crime scene that had been the Stotchs' house.

"Agent Frodo killed it- crushed it with his bare hand. Butters saw the whole thing." Kenny drawled, though his face had more anguish than his sarcastic tone might have given away. Watching a government agent, even a midget, kill a beloved pet in such a manner must have been a fucked up sight to see. "Dee feels kinda responsible for the whole thing, so he thought we'd go to the pet shop and buy a new hamster as a gift for him; so the cage isn't standing empty as a shitty reminder of all the hell that went down."

I don't feel responsible, I am responsible. Dee gave Kenny a look, but he either brushed it off or didn't notice. If I hadn't broke Agent Russel's brain, he probably wouldn't have escaped police custody in the first place, much less tried to go on a shooting spree... but at lest the fucker's dead. For once, trigger-happy SPPD saves the cock-sucking day.

"Dude, you couldn't have known that was gonna happen."

Dee blinked- that wasn't Kenny telling her to calm the fuck down with the self guilt bullshit; it was Kyle. His expression had tightened up, his gaze serious as he demanded her attention.

Her frown pushed off to one side, half-forming into a pout. Maybe not, but this isn't the first time this power has backfired. I still don't know if Cartman has any more lasting damage to his braincase from when I screamed at him.

"Kyle's right, man." Stan pitched in as Dee dug her pity-party heels in. "You've got legit super powers, and you figured out you could influence people offline, what, a month ago? One raging psychopath out of all the experiments you've done so far isn't half bad."

Two. Did y'all forget about Cartman kidnapping Wendy and trying to beat her skull in with a baseball bat?

"Ehhh, call it one and a half." Kenny offered, withdrawing his supportive hand and giving her a punch to the shoulder. "We don't know how much of that crazy was just... y'know, Cartman."

She suddenly put her hands up, a gesture that expressed defeat once she was set upon at all sides. Alright, alright, you guys win. Let's just get moving and go buy a hamster, okay?

Seats were pushed out, trash was shoved into the nearest bin, with Dee taking the lead with her hands shoved into the kangaroo pocket of her electric blue hoodie, pushing aside the poofy material of her open overcoat and making her shape even bulkier than usual. She still remembered the surprised glances she'd gotten the first day she'd changed for gym, as many of her classmates had assumed she was kinda fat under her ever-present baggy-ass hoodie. Instead, they'd found out she was quite tiny, hardly an imposing silhouette at all once she was dressed down to a T-shirt and gym shorts... and a binder, allowing her to pass.

I'm going to have to come out as a girl soon. Wearing a binder during gym isn't good for me, and it hurts when I really dig in.

"How is therapy going, by the way?"

Behind her, the conversation continued on, Kyle asking Stan how his foray in looking after his mental health was faring.

"It's... interesting." Stan reported, somewhat reluctantly. "We've been starting with talk therapy, and CBT- learning how to change the way I think about things, I guess? It's been helpful a couple of times, but..."

"Hey, dude, it's okay." Kyle's tone softened, snapping into support mode. "You just started. It's not gonna change your life overnight."

"Yeah, but my dad's starting to wonder where I'm disappearing to- I haven't told anyone in my family. Mom might get it, but dad doesn't know the difference between a psychologist, a psychiatrist, and a witch doctor. And if he throws one of his tantrums? … It'll all be over."

"Just tell 'em you're at my place. I'll cover for you."

"And what if my mom calls your mom?" Stan demanded.

"Tell 'em you're at my place." Kenny sneered, and Dee was fairly certain she heard the sound of fabric sliding together that had to be Kenny putting an arm over Stan's shoulder. "If my mom is even sober enough to answer the phone, she'll just repeat anything I tell her... and if I'm not home, she'll assume we went out. Boom."

"You... you guys."

Dee suddenly pulled up to a stop, looking back at the trio of trailing boys. She was right about Kenny taking Stan under his arm, looking just about ready to snap the kid into a head-lock and noogie him if he protested all this supportive bromance any harder. Kyle had his hands in his pockets, but he had this smile that looked so proud of Stan for what he'd already do so far in trying to get help. In the middle, Stan was a mixture of moved and utterly embarrassed, chocolate brown eyes dashing away and to the floor to avoid making direct contact with anyone around him.

Sweeping back, Dee turned herself sideways to force herself in between Stan and Kenny, forcing them apart at the shoulders and pushing her back hard against Kenny's ribcage, sending him away and forcing him to regain his balance. In the same motion, she'd pushed Stan up to the front of the pack, rescuing him from all this mushy shit in one go... and also putting him off-balance for a second, his arms windmilling as he hopped on one foot, half-tripped, and got the other one down just in time to catch himself. "Wha- hey!"

Thank me later, sourpuss. She smirked, hands returning to her stomach pouch as both Kyle shot her the was that really necessary? look. In her opinion, yes, yes it was.

A second later, she felt a weight collide with her back, a pair of arms thrown over her shoulders as she found herself giving an unexpected piggy-back ride to Kenny. Feet spread, arms were thrown forward, and she felt his knees dig into his sides as he completely committed to being the monkey on her back... a particularly gangly monkey who was a fair bit taller than her. And yet? Once she got her balance, she rolled with it, scooping her hands up under his shins to help hold him up on her back, all with Stan and Kyle looking on and holding back laughter.

"Mush!" Kenny urged as one would a team of sled-dogs, thrusting his arm out and pointing forward, which was directly at Kyle in this moment.

"Dudes, the pet shop is this way." Stan called out, shoving his hands in his pockets and shaking his head at all the goofery, turning and continuing on himself. Kyle was falling in line behind him.

Kenny quickly re-directed his insistent pointing, finger now stabbing in the correct direction. "MUSH!"

A moment later, Dee blew past Stan and Kyle, Kenny laughing manically all the while.


::The Author's Corner::

AND WE ARE BACK!

I wanted to set a lighter tone for this story. Not to say things won't get a touch intense later, but the stakes are not going to be nearly as high as the previous installments. Think of it as a bit of a breather after all the shit that happened last time 'round.

And if you're all wondering about the title... don't worry, all will be revealed in good time. :3

ONWARDS!

-Buttlord