Disclaimer: I do not own Yami no Matsuei.
Daddy Shinigami! (Somebody give me a decent title!!!!!!!)
Those who must die go to the land of the dead, "Meifu". THERE IS AN ORGANIZATION HERE WHICH JUDGES THE SOULS OF THE DEAD-"Juocho". IN THE CENTER OF THAT IS [ENMACHO], HEADED BY THE LORD OF HELL [ENMADAIOH]. IT'S MEIFU'S LARGEST CHO. THOSE WHO WORK IN THE ENMACHO SHOKAN BUREAU ARE CALLED "SHINIGAMI".
Author: (rereads the start of the fic) I just had to start it that way... (sweatdrops) If anyone understands whatever I wrote here, please explain it to me. I just copied that from a manga scan that I got from sakura- crisis.net! Nyahahahaha!!! (cough, cough) Now for the story itself...
....... Now loading....... please be patient.........
The story won't come out of my head... please wait a while as I hit it (my head) on the nearest wall. (bangs head on wall) Ouch! There! Now for the story itself... (Ooh... look at the pretty stars...)
............................Loading.............................5.......4... .....3........2........1........
Once upon a time in an underworld far far away (unless you're in Japan), there lived four gorgeous but (unfortunately for the non-yaoi loving ladies) gay shinigamis who are currently having (much to Tatsumi's dismay) a huge money problem mainly due to Tsuzuki's excessive eating and Watari's lab experiments blowing up all over the place, causing a hell lot of damage. So, Tatsumi decided to have a meeting to help solve this problem. Because Watari had been playing with chemicals (kids, don't do that at home) while waiting for his other friends to come (Hisoka and Tsuzuki), the meeting room had a nice view of the world outside i.e. a large hole on the wall.
While Watari was wiping his face clean with his sleeve and Tatsumi was already adding up the cost of repairs for all the things Watari blew-up, shrunk, vaporized, etc, Hisoka came in. He took a seat and started to read.
An hour later, Tatsumi was now shaking his head in dismay because their total expenses are way over the top, Hisoka was still reading and Watari gave the room another wonderful view... there was now a hole on the floor and you could see who's in the men's bathroom. Unfortunately due to the hole in the roof and the need for censorship so that the author won't be known as a pervert, no one seems to be entering the bathroom.
Oh, wait, the bathroom door is opening. Who's the unlucky victim who's going to be exposed? Why it's Tsuzuki! He sure looks sick, must have been that wasabi sauce he added to his Cinnapon rolls. (And we all thought that he had an iron stomach... tsk, tsk, tsk...) He opens the door to a cubicle, unzips his pants, sits down on the toilet bowl and.. err... contemplates...
"Hey, look! It's Tsuzuki!" announced Watari to his companions. He then stuck his had in hole on the floor (the ceiling if you're in the men's bathroom), his trusty owl circling around him. "Hi, Tsuzuki!" he greeted with a cheery grin that no one in the right mind would give a person who is currently constipating contemplating.
"ACK!" screamed Tsuzuki. "Watari! What are you doing here?!" He looked up to see Tatsumi raise an eyebrow at him and an enraged Hisoka ready to hurl a chair at him. Tsuzuki sweatdropped and waved shyly. "Err... guys, would you mind looking away for a while so I could finish what I was doing and go?"
Okay, let's be kind to poor Tsuzuki and look away for a while, shall we? There... all done. Tsuzuki then ran to the room and opened the door. "I'm really sorry! I'm late again!" he announced. He quickly took a seat and made a thousand more sorries.
"There's some tissue paper stuck to your shoe..." Hisoka commented. Tsuzuki pouted, peeled the tissue paper from his shoe and threw it in the trash.
"Ehem... let's get down to business, shall we?" said Tatsumi as he stood up and started to explain their current situation. Because this is a really long explanation which needed a lot of visual aids, graphs and statistics, we'll skip the boring part and just go straight to the meat of the subject. Their division is currently having a large deficit because... "...of Watari and Tsuzuki," Tatsumi concluded.
Tsuzuki sprouted his usual doggy-ears and asked innocently, "Who, me?" Watari was too busy concocting another scientific marvel to notice.
"Baka," Hisoka mumbled. "It's because you eat too much."
"I do not!" argued Tsuzuki.
"Do too!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Do not! Do not! Do not!"
Now this childish argument could go on for hours if the two weren't distracted by a blast. Looks like Watari just succeeded in giving them a wonderful view of the sky. Watari smiled sheepishly and hid from Tatsumi's I'd-kill-you-if-only-you-weren't-dead-yet glare.
"So, what are we supposed to do about our money problem?" asked Hisoka, returning to the original topic of this meeting.
"Ooh! Ooh!" Watari raised a hand and waved it wildly. "I could sell some of my inventions!"
"NO!" screamed the three in unison.
"Why not?" Watari asked.
"No one would buy devices that has no sense of style at all," Tatsumi explained. "Plus some of your inventions and concoctions could endanger the general public."
"A bake sale!" suggested Tsuzuki. "A bake sale!"
"You're just going to eat up everything!" shouted Hisoka.
"Will not!" argued Tsuzuki.
"Will too!"
"Will not!"
"Will too!"
Tatsumi decided to stop this before this fic gets too long just because of a lovers' quarrel. "People, settle down!" he shouted. Hisoka and Tsuzuki continued on fighting. "Settle down before I single-handedly solve this problem by not giving you your wages for the whole year!" he threatened. That got them all to shut up.
"Good," he continued. "I found out an easy way for us to raise money and that is by-"
"Selling our services as prostitutes?" asked Tsuzuki.
Everyone stared at him. Hisoka blushed beet red. "Baka! Where did that idea come from?!"
"I dunno," Tsuzuki answered. "The author wanted someone to say that line and picked me to do it. Blame her."
"Stupid author..." mumbled Hisoka. (Hello! I'm the author! Lalalalalalala!!!)
"No Tsuzuki," Tatsumi said. "I didn't mean that, although you're welcome to earn money that way if you want too." Tsuzuki shook his head wildly. "Good. I was planning for us to adopt a child."
"WHAT?!" Tsuzuki exclaimed, blushing. Hisoka pretended that he didn't hear anything. Watari's new concoction blew up on his face.
"I meant that the four of us will adopt a child," said Tatsumi, much to Hisoka's relief. "The government has now issued a law that those who adopt a child will get a monthly allowance."
Now the other three could have argued with their beloved secretary that taking care of a child is serious business and they might not be able to provide a healthy environment for the child but then what's the point of me writing this fic if they won't adopt a child? So they decided to adopt a child.
TBC
Daddy Shinigami! (Somebody give me a decent title!!!!!!!)
Those who must die go to the land of the dead, "Meifu". THERE IS AN ORGANIZATION HERE WHICH JUDGES THE SOULS OF THE DEAD-"Juocho". IN THE CENTER OF THAT IS [ENMACHO], HEADED BY THE LORD OF HELL [ENMADAIOH]. IT'S MEIFU'S LARGEST CHO. THOSE WHO WORK IN THE ENMACHO SHOKAN BUREAU ARE CALLED "SHINIGAMI".
Author: (rereads the start of the fic) I just had to start it that way... (sweatdrops) If anyone understands whatever I wrote here, please explain it to me. I just copied that from a manga scan that I got from sakura- crisis.net! Nyahahahaha!!! (cough, cough) Now for the story itself...
....... Now loading....... please be patient.........
The story won't come out of my head... please wait a while as I hit it (my head) on the nearest wall. (bangs head on wall) Ouch! There! Now for the story itself... (Ooh... look at the pretty stars...)
............................Loading.............................5.......4... .....3........2........1........
Once upon a time in an underworld far far away (unless you're in Japan), there lived four gorgeous but (unfortunately for the non-yaoi loving ladies) gay shinigamis who are currently having (much to Tatsumi's dismay) a huge money problem mainly due to Tsuzuki's excessive eating and Watari's lab experiments blowing up all over the place, causing a hell lot of damage. So, Tatsumi decided to have a meeting to help solve this problem. Because Watari had been playing with chemicals (kids, don't do that at home) while waiting for his other friends to come (Hisoka and Tsuzuki), the meeting room had a nice view of the world outside i.e. a large hole on the wall.
While Watari was wiping his face clean with his sleeve and Tatsumi was already adding up the cost of repairs for all the things Watari blew-up, shrunk, vaporized, etc, Hisoka came in. He took a seat and started to read.
An hour later, Tatsumi was now shaking his head in dismay because their total expenses are way over the top, Hisoka was still reading and Watari gave the room another wonderful view... there was now a hole on the floor and you could see who's in the men's bathroom. Unfortunately due to the hole in the roof and the need for censorship so that the author won't be known as a pervert, no one seems to be entering the bathroom.
Oh, wait, the bathroom door is opening. Who's the unlucky victim who's going to be exposed? Why it's Tsuzuki! He sure looks sick, must have been that wasabi sauce he added to his Cinnapon rolls. (And we all thought that he had an iron stomach... tsk, tsk, tsk...) He opens the door to a cubicle, unzips his pants, sits down on the toilet bowl and.. err... contemplates...
"Hey, look! It's Tsuzuki!" announced Watari to his companions. He then stuck his had in hole on the floor (the ceiling if you're in the men's bathroom), his trusty owl circling around him. "Hi, Tsuzuki!" he greeted with a cheery grin that no one in the right mind would give a person who is currently constipating contemplating.
"ACK!" screamed Tsuzuki. "Watari! What are you doing here?!" He looked up to see Tatsumi raise an eyebrow at him and an enraged Hisoka ready to hurl a chair at him. Tsuzuki sweatdropped and waved shyly. "Err... guys, would you mind looking away for a while so I could finish what I was doing and go?"
Okay, let's be kind to poor Tsuzuki and look away for a while, shall we? There... all done. Tsuzuki then ran to the room and opened the door. "I'm really sorry! I'm late again!" he announced. He quickly took a seat and made a thousand more sorries.
"There's some tissue paper stuck to your shoe..." Hisoka commented. Tsuzuki pouted, peeled the tissue paper from his shoe and threw it in the trash.
"Ehem... let's get down to business, shall we?" said Tatsumi as he stood up and started to explain their current situation. Because this is a really long explanation which needed a lot of visual aids, graphs and statistics, we'll skip the boring part and just go straight to the meat of the subject. Their division is currently having a large deficit because... "...of Watari and Tsuzuki," Tatsumi concluded.
Tsuzuki sprouted his usual doggy-ears and asked innocently, "Who, me?" Watari was too busy concocting another scientific marvel to notice.
"Baka," Hisoka mumbled. "It's because you eat too much."
"I do not!" argued Tsuzuki.
"Do too!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Do not! Do not! Do not!"
Now this childish argument could go on for hours if the two weren't distracted by a blast. Looks like Watari just succeeded in giving them a wonderful view of the sky. Watari smiled sheepishly and hid from Tatsumi's I'd-kill-you-if-only-you-weren't-dead-yet glare.
"So, what are we supposed to do about our money problem?" asked Hisoka, returning to the original topic of this meeting.
"Ooh! Ooh!" Watari raised a hand and waved it wildly. "I could sell some of my inventions!"
"NO!" screamed the three in unison.
"Why not?" Watari asked.
"No one would buy devices that has no sense of style at all," Tatsumi explained. "Plus some of your inventions and concoctions could endanger the general public."
"A bake sale!" suggested Tsuzuki. "A bake sale!"
"You're just going to eat up everything!" shouted Hisoka.
"Will not!" argued Tsuzuki.
"Will too!"
"Will not!"
"Will too!"
Tatsumi decided to stop this before this fic gets too long just because of a lovers' quarrel. "People, settle down!" he shouted. Hisoka and Tsuzuki continued on fighting. "Settle down before I single-handedly solve this problem by not giving you your wages for the whole year!" he threatened. That got them all to shut up.
"Good," he continued. "I found out an easy way for us to raise money and that is by-"
"Selling our services as prostitutes?" asked Tsuzuki.
Everyone stared at him. Hisoka blushed beet red. "Baka! Where did that idea come from?!"
"I dunno," Tsuzuki answered. "The author wanted someone to say that line and picked me to do it. Blame her."
"Stupid author..." mumbled Hisoka. (Hello! I'm the author! Lalalalalalala!!!)
"No Tsuzuki," Tatsumi said. "I didn't mean that, although you're welcome to earn money that way if you want too." Tsuzuki shook his head wildly. "Good. I was planning for us to adopt a child."
"WHAT?!" Tsuzuki exclaimed, blushing. Hisoka pretended that he didn't hear anything. Watari's new concoction blew up on his face.
"I meant that the four of us will adopt a child," said Tatsumi, much to Hisoka's relief. "The government has now issued a law that those who adopt a child will get a monthly allowance."
Now the other three could have argued with their beloved secretary that taking care of a child is serious business and they might not be able to provide a healthy environment for the child but then what's the point of me writing this fic if they won't adopt a child? So they decided to adopt a child.
TBC
