A/N: I should be working on my WIPs, especially 'Faking It', but I'm sorry guys, my mind keeps wandering and coming up with these one-shots that just won't leave me be! For this one, I blame Christian Kane hismelf, and his wonderful album The House Rules. This chapter was inspired by Track 6 - Callin' All Country Women.

(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

A Little Piece O' Home

Eliot's door slammed loudly, prompting Parker to poke her head out of her own office to see what was going on. She frowned as she ventured out into the hallway and then came across Hardison in the board room looking flustered.

"What's going on?" she asked from behind him, making him jump violently.

"Geez, Parker, could you maybe not do the creepin' up thing?" he urged her, "Like tonight isn't crazy enough already" he sighed, "Y'know me and my man Eliot had plans to go out, hit some clubs, get some drinks, meet some women..." he stopped elaborating and grinning both when he realised Parker was not impressed, "Right, so we went, we drank, we kinda partied, but Eliot... I don't know, man, he just wasn't into it"

"So, he's not into clubbing. So what?" Parker shrugged not seeing what the big deal was as she glanced towards the hitter's door and then proceeded to follow Hardison as he headed into the kitchen.

"We went before and things was cool" the hacker explained as he rifled through the fridge but came up empty, "Lately, I don't know if you noticed, but Eliot has been extra mean and crotchety. I figured a night out would cheer the man up, especially if we could make good with the ladies, know what I'm sayin'?" he said, with a waggle of his eyebrows.

"Yes, unfortunately, I do know" replied Parker as she leant on the door jamb wrinkling her nose.

"It's like them girls at the club, they just weren't what he wanted" said Hardison thoughtfully as he gave up on finding anything here he wanted to eat and closed all the cupboard doors he'd just opened, "Not that I'm sayin' Eliot is not into girls and all, just... I don't know" he shrugged, "but the man is in some deep funk about somethin' and I ain't poking the bear to find out what it is" he said definitely as he moved to leave.

As he passed by the kitchen door, he patted Parker on the shoulder and wished her goodnight. The blonde barely reacted, her mind preoccupied with what might be wrong with Eliot. Men liked to go out and drink and pick up women, even she knew that, and she had a very limited understanding of social protocol. It was odd for a guy like Eliot not to enjoy those activities, she thought, as she wandered back through the building until she reached his office door. She briefly considered knocking, before deciding against it. Sometimes he got mad at her for asking him questions or getting in his way. It was fine, he didn't scare her or anything, but she could live without it.

It took all of a minute before Parker had a new plan. Sophie had been training her in being a better, more considerate person lately, and that meant she knew she had to find a way to help Eliot with whatever he was going through right now. Talking to him about his problems was likely to upset him more, so she would have to find out on her own, which was how Parker came to be in the air-ducts, silently sliding on her stomach until she was over the vent in the ceiling of Eliot's office.

Parker was a little surprised to realise that the hitter was sitting on the couch holding a guitar in his hands. She knew he had such an instrument, though he never played it in front of the team. Now, because he figured he was alone, he was strumming at chords that made a tune she didn't recognise, his eyes closed like he was concentrating or maybe just trying to relax somehow.

It took a few moments for Parker to get comfy and to start to enjoy the easy sound of first Eliot's playing and then eventually his singing. He had a beautiful voice, which wasn't entirely what she'd expected. He didn't say much as a rule, and what he did say was usually all rough and sharp, like he'd rather not have to talk at all. When he sang it was so different, and she liked it a lot. Parker had to make sure she didn't let her eyes fall shut because there was every chance she'd be asleep in no time, whether this was meant to be a lullaby or not.

After a couple of quieter songs, Eliot seemed to find his rhythm and played something a littler rockier. It was still a country song, of course, but it had an edge to it. Even Parker who was no expert in music knew it was different and she sat up (figuratively and not literally in the confined space of the air-duct) and took notice. She didn't know whether to take Eliot's words seriously or not, wasn't sure if he really had driven through LA with a model and a cigar, or if he ever went to a place called Bungalow 8 in New York. What she did understand was the chorus of his song, that he was missing the country life and the women that went along with it. It would be difficult to forget that Eliot was from the south, since every fourth word tended to be 'y'all' or similar when he got to talking much. It had never occurred to Parker that he might miss whatever life he had before the team though. Maybe it should have, but then the little blonde thief didn't have an old life to miss herself.

"This country boy needs a little home" Eliot sang the last line of his song, and Parker gazed down at the sadness written on his face.

She wasn't great at reading people, but an emotion that intense was hard for anyone not to notice. With a silent smile, Parker shimmied her way back along the air-duct, a plan already forming in her mind. She didn't want Eliot going home, away from her and the team, but perhaps she could bring a little of what he loved here to LA...


Anyone else might have felt a little silly, but not Parker. She didn't seem to have the ability for embarrassment in the same way that other people did, and besides she was doing this for Eliot, so it would all be worth it when she saw him and that rarely seen smile that she liked so much returned to his face.

There was no-one else in the offices, just as she had hoped. It was Sunday after all and they had no job til tomorrow when they were due to meet a new client. Parker had text Eliot from one of the phones Hardison gave her for a cover, and told him to be in his office at 2pm, without saying why or even who was demanding his presence. That was why she wasn't bothered when she strolled into his office and saw shock register on his face. Of course, Eliot's complete surprise had less to to with Parker's arrival and much more to do with what she was wearing.

"Hey" she greeted him with a smile that was appropriately girlish given the pigtails in her hair and the overly red cowboy hat on top of her head.

There was really nothing child-like about the rest of her clothes, Eliot realised, as his eyes travelled down her slim, toned frame. A blue and white checked shirt was tied with a knot just above her midriff and Daisy Duke style cut-off jean shorts showed off long shapely legs to just below her knees, where cowboy boots began and ended at the ground with heels she really didn't need.

For Parker, the moment was a little anticlimactic. In place of the smile she'd hoped to cause on Eliot's face, she instead saw a confused sort of frown.

What she didn't realise was that Eliot was still trying to decipher what this was all about, and hadn't yet found the words to ask. If Parker was trying to be cute, well, she passed. If she was trying to turn him on, hell, the girl was doing a much better job of that than anything else right now, as she put her hands on her hips, striking a pose, however unintentionally.

"I'm sorry" she said, as if she'd read his mind, and Eliot did his best to shift focus back to her face and her words, but man, it'd been a long time since..., "I got it wrong again, didn't I?" said Parker, crestfallen and shifting awkwardly, folding and unfolding her arms over her chest.

"Parker, honey, I don't..." Eliot began, closing his eyes a moment and pushing his hair off his face as he tried to rephrase what he meant to say, desperate not to offend her, "It kinda depends on what you were trying to do" he admitted, sitting down on the edge of the desk.

"I don't know" she shrugged her shoulders, "I mean, yesterday you seemed so sad, and I heard you singing about the country girls that you missed... I wanted to help" she explained.

"Oh, you're helping'" he said, clearing his throat, thinking maybe he shoudn't be encouraging her right now.

This was Parker after all, no matter how hot she looked or sweet she was being. The fact she had heard him singing yesterday had to mean she'd been spying or eavesdropping, and yet right now, Eliot couldn't find it in himself to be mad, or anything really except kind of flattered and really, really turned on.

"So, I do look like your country women?" checked Parker with childish glee, though the other 99% of her was all very much woman right now.

"Darlin', if they all looked like you do right now, I never woulda left" he told her with a grin he just couldn't help.

Eliot could've sworn he saw her blush then, though he never really thought Parker was cable of it before. She never did stop surprising him it seemed.

"Well, I'm happy you left" she told him, stepping forward and closer to Eliot who figured he was safer staying put on the edge of his desk, elbows leant lazily on his knees, til he knew exactly how this situation was meant to play out, "I mean if you hadn't travelled, you wouldn't be here, on this team" she went on, "And as weird as it is, I think I'd probably miss you, if you weren't here" she admitted.

"That might be the nicest thing you ever said to me, Parker" he realised with an odd look she couldn't read, and an even odder feeling in his stomach that even the hitter himself couldn't identify.

"So" she turned on a dime like she so often did, clapping her hands together too close to Eliot's face, "I'm wearing the clothes, what next? What do country people actually do?" she asked with what appeared to be genuine interest, as she hopped up on the desk beside Eliot, "Apart from the horses stuff" she added very seriously.

"Er, well" he considered her question, pinching the bride of his nose a moment as he tried to maintain focus on things that were not Parker and how her body looked in these clothes, "When we're not workin' the land, we go out, drink whiskey" he explained, his southern boy drawl more evident than ever now he was reminiscing and Parker seemed captivated by the light in his eyes and the sound of his voice, "Me and my buddies would race tractors, or rock out in somebody's garage or barn when we had the time..."

"Were all your friends guys then?" she checked, at which he nodded.

"Most were, yeah" he agreed, not really thinking about where she was going with this til it was too late.

"But you knew girls" she noted, "Your country women you were singing about. What did they do?" she asked, sat there with her hands half in the pockets of her Daisy Dukes, all innocence somehow, even in the revealing clothes she wore.

"Uh, yeah" Eliot chuckled as he looked away, pushing his hair aside, before looking back at her, his eyes raking over her body as he replied, "Well, you've heard that expression 'rollin' in the hay', haven't ya, darlin'?"

Parker frowned a moment before she caught on, a smile curving her lips the very next second.

"Okay" she nodded, pushing aside papers and such on the desk before getting back onto her feet in a fluid cat-like movement, "I mean, we don't need actual hay for this, right?" she said with a look that was unmistakable as she moved to stand between Eliot's legs, her hands on his shoulders.

"Parker" he stopped her, or possibly inadvertantly encouraged her, by putting his hands to her waist, "Be serious" he urged her, though he couldn't deny she looked entirely sober in her decision here.

"Where's the fun in that?" she asked, leaning in closer and planting a kiss on his lips, catching him off-guard and pulling him around with her.

How she managed to get herself back across the desk with Eliot almost on top of her so easily was a bit of a mystery to the hitter, but here they were. He was held up from crushing her by just one elbow, his hair falling in both their faces as the hat that had been on her head tumbled to the floor.

"Parker..." he breathed, knowing that he must be crazy to want this, and yet at the same time sure he was going to give in if she let him.

"C'mon, country boy" she smiled, clearly tired of playing games as her arms locked around his neck, keeping him close, "Show me how they do it in Texas" she urged him, with a look that was impossible to resist.

Eliot didn't bother to try as he leaned down to kiss her long and hard on the lips. If he was going to get crazy today, he could think of no better person to do that with than Parker. One thing was for sure, he certainly wasn't missing home anymore.

The End