20 March, 19XX

Dear Petra-

We've moved again. Our squadron was deployed to France (what irony. I thought I was done with that hellhole. At least I can talk with these fuckers.), and now we're sitting by the river in the one thing I hate the most. Trenches. Our squadron, 101st Airborne (I am writing this down partly because I want a place I can be attached to, partly because when I die you can ask them for my cold, dead body. A tiny one at that.), has been attached to three other squadrons, one French, one British, and another American. We all are so tired and ready to leave, but the Germans hold us back.

God, I wish they would all die.

If I die, I don't expect you to wait for me. It was a stupid mistake on my part, really. I shouldn't have proposed when I knew I'd be drafted. But…I guess I was worried I would lose you. I never want to lose you, Petra.

We've gotten more men on our squadron. I honestly didn't want any more men to control, but do I have a choice? Do any of us have a choice? Did the child I saw be orphaned have a choice in losing his parents?

No. We live in a cruel world.

I never know how to cut off these letters, and I will not make empty promises to you. Because you don't deserve that.

I love you, Petra.

All my love,

Levi Ackerman,

1st SSgt of the 101st Airborne and rifle squadron

….

He finishes writing his letter and folds the crisp paper with a tired sigh, dragging a dirtied hand down his face. Gunther ducks his head down from his dugout to look at him, eyes tired and weary.

"Squad Leader, the new men are here," Gunther informs him, and Levi bites back a groan as he stands. The heavens pour down on them today and Levi wonders if it is a bad omen. He looks up to the skies before his silver gaze slides to a young Frenchman, probably on his way to his section of the trench.

"Francis, je tiens à ce que cette letter soit envoyée quand le soleil se levera demain. Compris?" He holds the letter up and the young man nods, taking the letter, gaze adverted.

He cracks his fingers and steps back when Gunther hops down from his dugout, helmet latched and protecting the soldier from the harsh rain.

"They're on the other side," Gunther tells him with an apologetic smile.

Levi stares at him darkly for a moment before roughly grabbing his helmet, plopping it on his dampened raven locks with an irritated look.

"Well? Let's go then." Since the bastards are too lazy to throw the fuckers into a better, somewhat safer spot.

The two make their way towards the other side of the trenches, catching up with Erwin Smith, the Squad Leader of the American squadron, and also the Commander of the Airforce squadron on France's soil. The tall man with the good looks and two-toned hair is no stranger to his squadron, and Levi can recount many stories of training with Erwin, his distracting cheekbones cutting through many leader's hearts and his eyebrows thick enough to constipate the enemies.

"How many men are you getting?" Erwin asks him, and Levi shrugs, eyebrow twitching in annoyance when his helmet dumps water onto his already damp uniform.

"Five I think. I lost half the squad on our last move. Those fuckers ahead of us said they would protect us, but when the Germans started shooting they ran away like the little shits they are."

Erwin nods, offering no apologies. Why would you apologize for the deaths of others? There are more men dropping like flies than the government can supply.

Levi could mourn the deaths. He really could. But he has no time to mourn – no time to be weak.

When he was home, safe in Petra's arms, then he would be able to cry and shout and curse God for taking away innocent lives.

The three slide past tight passways, now in the Frenchmen's territory, finally given some relief from the downpour. Frenchmen step to the sides as they pass, a couple nodding their heads in salute to Levi and Erwin. Erwin smiles tiredly at the men while Levi ignores them, slamming his helmet against a light above one man's dugout, where a blond and brunet were kissing breathlessly, the blond half naked.

He pauses to crouch down, glaring down at the two men locked in a passionate embrace. "Il y a des hommes qui se rendent malades, debout dans la pluie en attendant que ces putains d'Allemands se bougent le cul, et vous deux êtes ici, à essayer d'entrer dans le froc de l'autre parce que vous êtes tous les deux trop égoïstes!" Levi hisses, kicking the blond in the back. "Sortez de là et allez aider ceux qui en ont besoin!"

The blond and brunet nod and get dressed, both annoyed and a little fearful in front of the short man. Levi stands and dons his helmet once more, more annoyed than before.

Gunther quietly walks ahead of the two Squad Leaders, remembering the time Levi had yelled at him when he and Erd had tried at an intimate relationship.

Erwin steps back, closer to Levi, and the shorter man ignores the blond's sigh.

"Levi…why are you so harsh with these men? They want the comfort. It's not like they are killing each other. Why don't you find a man as well? I'm sure there are many willing to be with you-"

Erwin doesn't fight the shorter man when he slams him back against the rock wall, shaking with restrained anger.

"Find a man? Cheat on my fiancé?" Levi growls, gripping Erwin's uniform hard enough to tear it. "I have no problem with men finding comfort in other men. I don't care if they go at it every damn night like you and Mike. For fucks sake Erwin, you're halfway across the camp from me and I can hear you both clear as day! If you're trying to scare away the Germans, keep doing what you're doing because even I wouldn't want to be anywhere near you two."

He takes a breath and his grip slackens slightly.

"What I have a problem with is seeing these men, strong, capable of fighting, fucking each other in broad daylight. Have some damn restraint for God's sake! Wait until we are not under the line of fire before getting into someone's pants! Is that too much to ask for?!"

His voice carries throughout the underground tunnels and the men stop to stare at him, some in understanding, others just scared of his fury.

Erwin gingerly plucks his lithe fingers from his uniform and straightens the torn clothes with a clear of his throat. "Understood. At least be a little more gentle when you do though, please?"

Levi stares at him in utter resentment before turning on his heel and storming after Gunther without a word to the other.

He covers his right ear, hardly flinching when the riflemen duck down as the Germans retaliate with their own rain of fire. He looks up to see the new soldiers huddled together, eyes wide and frightened, and he curses under his breath.

Of course we get the ones that have never seen a wounded man before. What luck.

"Erwin Smith! Your charges are-" A commander starts yelling out the names of Erwin's charges amidst the screams of the bullets and he rolls his eyes, ducking down when one rifleman falls down to land in front of him, dead.

Levi ignores the man's pained eyes and looks up to see the man's companion taking over his spot, another soldier rising up to feed the monster its bullets.

Erwin's charges quickly get down into the trenches, and Erwin smiles at them and yells something lost to the sounds of war. Levi steps to the side to let the newbies pass, nodding to some brave enough to make eye contact with them.

The rain pounds down harder than ever and he vaguely wonders how the riflemen know where to shoot. But then he remembers when he was in their spot, shaking and absolutely terrified, tired and sick and ready to go home.

You just do what you know. And if you shoot to the sky, God Damnit you do it because then you'll feel like you're actually doing something right for once.

He looks up to the commander and suddenly a bomb rocks their trenches to the core. He drops to the mud, heart pounding wildly. The riflemen shout to each other, gather their bearings, and allow the grenadiers to take over.

Levi crouches up and holds a hand out to one of his charges, a blond head that looks like a girl. He pulls the boy down, and the boy shakily introduces himself as Armin Arlert.

"A pleasure, I'm sure," he snaps, pushing the boy to the ground. "I'm your leader, Levi Ackerman, and if you want to live, you'll do what's smart and keep your ass on the ground."

The boy nods, voice cracking in fear as he lies flat on the ground, pale face darkened by the bloodied mud.

Levi pulls two other boys, Jean Kirstein (He knows that boy is an arrogant asshole from the start. Maybe this attack will force him to grow a pair and stuff it.), and Marco Bodt (A kind kid. Levi is thoroughly surprised when the boy shouts that he is a grenadier.) to the ground and ducks once more when the Germans attack with bombs.

He looks up in shock when a couple riflemen shout angrily at a hotheaded boy who has latched onto the side of the trench, gun cocked and at the ready. Levi curses under his breath when he realizes the boy is actually trying to get into No Man's Land.

"Oi! Brat!" he shouts, standing up at the most dangerous time. The Fritz must have seen him move because not a second later, his head is their new target. He ducks back down once more and grabs the boy's foot, pulling him down.

There isn't much resistance from the boy. Really, how can he fight when the walls are made of mud and basically pointless in this downpour.

The boy falls to the ground and with the mud making him unsteady, he falls after the boy, landing on him painfully, Levi's elbow hitting his stomach none too gently.

"You idiot," Levi shouts, pushing himself up to glare at the boy. His green eyes glow in anger and excitement and Levi stares at him angrily, although slightly dumfounded at his expression.

"What the fuck were you doing?!" Levi slaps his face, helmet falling off to hit the boy on the head. Levi's raven locks fall down to cover his eyes, wet strands hitting his face. He irritably pushes the hair back to glare down at the excitable boy once more.

"I wanted to get on the field, sir!" the boy tells him, and Levi looks at him, incredulous. He tries some of Erwin's breathing exercises but after 30, he says fuck it and grabs the boy's collar, shaking him hard, silver eyes glowing in unadulterated anger.

"You what?! Are you fucking me right now?!" he all but screams, ignoring the riflemen around them. "I want you to stay in your dugout when we get back and I don't want to see your damn face until I need your ass to die. Am I understood?!"

The boy doesn't blink an eye at his outburst, a cheeky grin spreading across his childish, muddied face.

"Understood sir!"

"What is your name, you pain in the ass?" Levi calms himself now, and the rain has slowed to a soft drizzle, the war in front of them calming to a dulled roar.

The boy's eyes glow even brighter as he sits up, saluting him, not even flinching when his helmet wobbles and falls down in front of his turquoise gaze. Levi moves to crouch next to the troublemaker, pushing the brunet's helmet back up.

"Eren Jaeger, sir! An honor to serve with you!"

Petra,

You always said I was a calm, caring man.

Oh, grant me the patience to deal with this fucking idiot.

Otherwise he's going to get us all killed.

….

Translations:

Francis, je tiens à ce que cette letter soit envoyée quand le soleil se levera demain. Compris?

Francis, I want this letter sent when the sun rises its ugly face tomorrow. Understand?

Il y a des hommes qui se rendent malades, debout dans la pluie en attendant que ces putains d'Allemands se bougent le cul, et vous deux êtes ici, à essayer d'entrer dans le froc de l'autre parce que vous êtes tous les deux trop égoïstes! Sortez de là et allez aider ceux qui en ont besoin!

Sortir et vous aider!

There are men who are getting sick, standing out in the rain as they waiting for one fucking German to move and you two are in here, trying to get into the other's pants because you both are too damn selfish!

Get out there and help!

….

A/N: Thank you to the guest that helped with the French and my beta, KuraraOkumura. See you next chapter!