The star child lied.
I suspected as much.
They say that the best lies are wrapped up in truth, but I still had to gamble that my gut was right.
The catalyst told me that the created would always rebel against it's creators. I suspected this was, at least from the perspective of this AI, true. The Leviathan told me their creation had rebelled against them, betrayed them, and this was the creation they spoke of. But I'd seen the Geth and the Quarians work together, come to genuine peace as 2 disparate races, so I knew we could do better.
It told me it embodied the collective intelligence of the reapers. I suspected this was also true, and based on what I'd seen of the Reapers and the reaper indoctrination, this told me I couldn't trust much that this AI said.
It told me that I was the first organic ever to make it this far and that I had presented new options. Well, there's a Prothean in my crew that vouched for them never making it here, so ok, we'll go with this one.
Then there were some other things it said. It said that the Crucible appeared largely intact, but that the blast would not be constrained to the reapers. All synthetic life would die. It even pointed out that I'm partly synthetic. Then it said that technology we rely on would be effected, but those that survive should have little difficulty repairing the damage. The blast would take down the reapers and destroy them, but not actually destroy our tech. That told me there was a difference between this eons old AI and our modern tech. I wasn't sure if I could believe this but I didn't see that I had much choice.
It told me about my other options, that I could control the reapers myself, or combine organic and synthetic life into one species that would exist in peace. The line about me already being partially synthetic made sense now.
I had to think fast. The war was still raging around me and I knew time was short.
Saren evangelized saving the galaxy through synthesis. Upgrades he called them, but he was a tool of the Reapers, indoctrinated into believing what they wanted him to believe.
The Illusive Man wanted to control the Reapers, and believed he had, and that clearly turned out well for him. You could practically hear the desire for "control them" dripping off the tongue of that damn program like it was honey, too.
I knew destroying them was the only option. The galaxy would never be safe otherwise.
In 3 years, I've not made a more difficult decision than I did in considering the idea that I could destroy the Reapers, but would potentially kill EDI and the Geth in the process, what with both of them having Reaper code in their programs and robotic platforms carrying them. I chose to believe that the catalyst had been lying about this part. I trusted that whatever kill switch was being triggered in the reapers didn't exist in our synthetics, and kept pulling the trigger, each step seeming to empower me. I pulled it for Thane. I pulled it for Anderson. I pulled it for Legion. I heard the cacophonous explosion and everything went black.
I'm told they found me in the rubble on the Citadel. I still don't know how I survived, but then, I was dead once before, too.
Hackett tells me that we can rebuild everything that was damaged or destroyed. The force that built the Crucible is already working on the relays. Thanks to QEC technology, we're in communication with all the major worlds, and every species is sending teams to check on any colonies that have been cut off from the rest of the galaxy. Things are bad, but the threat of the Reapers is gone, so everyone is smiling. They'll survive, and that's enough. We lost a lot of people, a lot of good people, and everyone is working to make sure that their sacrifices weren't in vain.
Dr. Chakwas has left the Normandy to take up station as my doctor. Joker came to see me a couple days ago to tell me that the pulse from the Crucible knocked out EDI's systems and the mobile platform, but that she was still in the Normandy's computers once the old girl was repaired and is now repairing herself. Apparently she keeps backups. He's still upset about losing the sexy robot body, though. He wouldn't say so, but I suspect he's got it hidden in the bowels of the ship somewhere in hopes that she can come up with a way to get it running again. The Geth, too, managed to survive, but the Quarians are having to repair the damage done to their bodies by the Crucible. Garrus, Liara, Tali, James, Steve, my whole team… they've all been paying me regular visits. Miranda and Oriana have some peace now that their father is gone. Zaeed still hasn't taken off that armor, but he's finally retired and doing some fishing.
Ash comes every day. She brought me that book of Tennyson poems, and reads to me when she can't think of anything else to say. Every poem comes with a story. It's hard for her, I know. I'm just glad she's here. I've spent the last 3 years sacrificing for the good of the galaxy, but now that the Reapers are defeated, I'm glad to know that I've got somebody to go home to when I get out of this hospital. It's time I sat down.
