New Year. The old year dies at exactly midnight to make way for the new year.

The same way my old self will die and rise anew, like a phoenix.

It isn't even close to midnight yet, but everyone is practicing the way they light their fireworks. I live a considerable distance away from it all, but I can still hear the preparations. Meanwhile, I am sitting here alone to reflect on the past year.

I found Tae-chan again. Marrying her didn't turn out as well as I thought, but we're still friends and I still love her. Because of her, I met new people and made new friends. I'm still not fond of dressing up in those lolita outfits that Ayumu keeps forcing on me, but I've learned to appreciate perfume.

And speaking of Ayumu...

"Get that out of my closet or I'll give you a closer view of the fireworks." There was a scuffle and a crash. That takes care of that, but I better check if he left it there later. They say that what you say or do when New Year comes is what you'll be doing for the rest of that year. Somehow the thought of sitting alone on my porch makes me kind of sad. Since that incident when we were children, it felt like I was all alone, even amongst the teachers, the political friends, even with my father.

I felt all alone, and I still do sometimes.

But Kami blessed me with this past year. Besides Tae-chan, I met the Yorozuya. Shinpachi has potential to be more than what he is, if only he could let himself go every now and then. Hmph, as if I'm one to talk about letting yourself go. And that Yato girl, Kagura. Saka-Gintoki-san has the perfect partner-in-crime in that girl. Even meeting that gorilla Kondou and his Shinsengumi worked out better than I thought. And Katsura-san, I guess he hasn't forgotten how much more popular I had become for a while. Maybe he's gotten over it now, maybe not, oh well.

Valentine's day passed by, of course I didn't give anyone chocolate. White day came and went, nobody gave me any chocolate. Then came the time I tried to marry Tae-chan. My birthday came soon after. I won't forget how she put a party hat on my head and fed me cake, or how jealous Kondo-san looked when he witnessed it. The day I had to wear the lolita outfit... well, I don't really want to remember that.

There were the times that I wanted to have plastic surgery to be more like a man. Ayumu tried to stop me, but it was Tae-chan who managed to convince me. I suppose it was for the best. Now that I look back, becoming a man probably wouldn't suit me. It started when I saw the his picture in the paper. I can't remember what his name was, or why he was in the paper, but for the moment, I thought I was gay. There was just attraction there really. Everyone looked relieved when they heard the news, and Tae-chan was elated. Later on, I started to appreciate handsomeness... in other men, that is.

Mostly Gintoki-san and Katsura-san.

It won't be long now. I must move on.

Tae-chan. She can't love me as a man, and I respect that. To be honest, I still love her, but not the way I used to. I think I can call her a best friend now, not like before. There is still a feeling of peace when I'm with her and I'm glad it stayed.

They're starting to count down. What will the new year bring? Will Tae-chan change her mind, because if she does, she knows where to find me. Will I be more feminine? Maybe, maybe not. Will I be alone here the same time next New Year's Eve, and if I won't be alone, will I be with Tae-chan or a man?

I don't know.

But somehow, I don't think it matters right now. I've been alone for quite a while and I haven't died of loneliness. Maybe I can survive another year on my own. Wait.

I'm not alone. Not really. I have friends.

Ah, there it is. People shouting happy new year. Time for me to change myself.

"Ayumu."

"Yes, young master?"

"Happy New Year."

"Ah. Happy New Year, young master."

I'll smile. I'm sure this year will be wonderful.
~

Ladies and gentlemen, a fic to welcome the new year. Thanks for reading my stuff, even though I'm just another n00b. XD I sincerely hope your 2013 will be wonderful.

Love, Hiro-chan.