Hello! I'm reverse lotus and this is my first fanfic, so go easy on me. Mmk? Also, I'm a fan of yaoi Hiei/Kurama loveliness, and this fic will include such themes, so if you're not a fan of it… well, simply don't read it. I respect other people's preferences, so please respect mine.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. This fic is purely for entertainment and I have no financial gain by writing this, so yeah.

With all that out of the way…

Chapter 1: Prelude

No, it was impossible.

Raindrops fell in sheets from the sky; dark and ominous as it was, it couldn't compare to a certain hiyoukai's inner turmoil. Thunder rolled and lightning streaked across dirty storm clouds, colors like gray and dull violet reigning supreme in the warring weather.

Unthinkable, it was unthinkable and untrue.

Unconcerned with the weather in his dazed state, Hiei merely walked. Water soaked through his clothing in mere seconds, but still he walked on, no where in particular being his destination. It didn't really matter anymore, now did it?

Nothing mattered anymore.

If someone were to glance out their window into the storm's midst they'd see nothing more but a hollow shell of a once powerful demon. A being, feared by many in all three Worlds for his cunning and viciousness and power, no longer the being he once was. He was… uncaring, detached from all reality with eyes glazed over, staring at nothing more than the ground beneath his feet.

Just one step at a time…

Then all at once he stopped walking, finding a familiar residence only feet from were he stood. He faintly wondered how he arrived there. Was it a subconscious seeking of comfort perhaps? To find he'd walked to the Fox's house without predetermined direction was somewhat… unsettling.

Unsettling… asphyxiating.

Not even the Fox could fix this, he dimly realized, a pained expression marring small, delicate features. As his crimson eyes closed against the cold rain and welcoming lights, he felt the undeniable urge to flee. To escape, because, maybe, if he ran fast enough, he'd outrun the truth that was bearing down on him. It felt suffocating, the weight of self-hatred.

I could have… Should have…

He didn't deserve the small bits of warm yellowish light that streamed through the Minamino residence windows. It seemed to ensnare him, the soft liquid-light, beckoning him with the prospect of release. He wanted to give in. To selfishly seek the comfort he knew he needed but didn't deserve. He was stronger than that… or, at least, he used to be.

"Hiei?"

The response was slow, nearly to the point of lethargic. Hiei opened his eyes. They were half-mast yet strangely unveiled, more open than Kurama had ever seen them.

"Come inside, Hiei."

Stepping aside, Kurama pulled the door wide open, quietly urging the soaked demon to cross the threshold. For all of his patience, he wanted to simply haul the hiyoukai inside, out of the storm and up the stairs where they could talk freely. Never had he seen Hiei this way and it set his natural protectiveness into high gear, filling his emerald eyes with obvious concern.

"Kurama… I—"

The demon's voice was weak and oddly strained, like his vocal cords suffered from great disuse, or perhaps overuse. Even the single word spoken seemed to crumble inside his throat from the weight of his distress. Subtly, the fire apparition wavered on his feet before tipping forward into unconsciousness.

"Hiei!"

Sharp reflexes allowed the kitsune to capture said demon before he met the ground, and he quickly pulled the smaller form inside. No matter how fragile and young Hiei appeared, the hiyoukai was far from childlike, with his sturdy frame overlaid in muscle. It made Kurama's job a difficult one, as he had to take one step at a time, an armful of fire demon dangling limply from his embrace.

What's going on…?

Once inside his room, Kurama lifted the fire apparition onto his bed, searching for wounds to be cleaned and bandaged. There were few, which proved mystifying, as large bloodstains reddened the skin of Hiei's neck and chest. The kitsune bent to scent the blood and was satisfied to find it demon and, more importantly, harmless. Some of the more exotic demons possessed naturally poisoned or acidic blood, much like Kurama's own.

"…no. Please, anything but- no… kisama, I'll kill you…"

The muttered words made Kurama freeze, listening, puzzling over the meaning with narrowed eyes. It was extremely rare for Hiei to talk in his sleep, although the demon was prone to nightmares. Nimble fingers threaded through the demon's hair, trying to provide comfort that Kurama knew only he could give. No one else was close enough to Hiei in order to know just how feral the demon could be, how he resembled a feline in more than just an apathetic nature.

"What happened, Hiei?"

The spirit fox continued his soothing caresses, using long, slow strokes to smooth out the apparition's fur-like hair; soon enough eliciting a soft, rhythmic purring from the unconscious form, as the pained expression and mumbled curses faded.

"Ugh…"

As Hiei awoke the purring disappeared, leaving the room silent save the relentless tapping of rain against the roof and windows. The hiyoukai open his eyes but didn't move, much to Kurama's confusion. Usually the demon would have been thoroughly displeased at being fondled like some ningen pet, even if the action was found comforting.

"…Hiei?"

No response from the diminutive demon. Kurama pulled back his hand and frowned at the sight of his fingers painted in blood.

"Talk to me. Where did all this blood come from?"

He was desperately trying to remain calm, but as seconds ticked away and Hiei refused to react, he found worry truly taking over. It manifested in his voice, as it became not hysterical, like most would have believed, but sharp. The kitsune was becoming angry in his frustration, which was not unlike the nature of a fox.

"If you don't start talking soon, Hiei…"

There, a shift of crimson eyes and Hiei was looking at him. It was a start, although the kitsune was far from satisfied. He wouldn't be content until he knew what had happened to cause the usually spitfire demon to appear so empty of everything that defined him.

"Now, where did all this blood come from?"

Hiei blinked, slow to reply.

"Demon."

With an impatient huff, Kurama tried again.

"What demon? Hiei, what happened?"

Silence followed and Hiei closed his eyes, which caused Kurama to grow feral. His hair fluffed like hackles and he leaned down, nearly nose-to-nose, towering over the smaller demon.

"You are the most infuriating being sometimes."

Crimson eyes opened and peered into emerald, and only then did Kurama recognize the scent of tears. They were collecting in the fire demon's eyes. All at once Kurama panicked and his eyes flew wide at the realization. He only knew of one thing that would ever make Hiei cry.

"Yukina's dead."